As I sit with my elixir to my right
and my chaser to my left
This emotional burden
I wish not heft
I find myself
Wanting this girl
This is the third
Time I'll try this world
She wants another
This I know
But however
I still put on this show
I'll try and I'll try
To prove I'm worthy
If she'll give up this guy
Who I know is .....is....
I know how I feel
This feeling is real
Only if she'd see
What she means to me
She's smart
That's a start
But, will she challenge
That's the real test
If she cannot best
I'll soon to see
If she better than me
I so desperately want her to be

I'm blind going into this
They say
Ignorance is bliss
I beg to differ
I want to know
For me, I wish she'd long
Again and again
I keep singing this song

**** this
**** everything
My vision blurs
But my mind is clear
I want her
But I have many fears
If she wants
I'm here

I can't. It hurts too much, I love you and I never said it and it ended too soon and now the words are ******* burnt on top of my tongue and heart forever stitched into my memory like an infected
Wound closed too early that harbors a breeding infection worsening with time. And I hate it, wish I could cut it out like a nagging splinter but I can't because it's intangible so ******* and **** this and **** me for
Letting you sear me branding your face into my eye sockets so I can't rest and I close my lids on purpose just to see you. So when he thinks I'm lost in kissing him my eyes are ******* shut because I'm saying hi to you again with my lips.

Using all of my energy,
I feel like I'm screaming.
But it all reality,
I'm just barely making a whisper.