I never think much about the fact that I am black.
I know I am black.
Like I know I am a girl,
Like I know I am an American,
Like I know I am nineteen.
It is a fact; I am black.

I hate when people say I am not.
My parents are black.
Their parents are black.
We are black.
Look at my skin,
It's dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not be black?
I am black.

I hate when people say I don't 'act' black.
How does one act to be considered black?
How am I acting? How is it not black?
Look at my skin,
It's dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not act black?
I am black.

I hate when people say I speak like a white person.
A way of speaking is not exclusive to race.
I am not white.
I do not speak like a white person.
My words are coming out of my black mouth.
I speak properly,
The way my black parents raised me to.
Look at my skin,
Its dark and it's beautiful.
How could I not speak black?
I am black.

I HATE when people say I am a white person trapped in a black body.
I have NEVER heard anything more insulting.
I am NOT trapped.
This color is NOT a cell.
I wear it proudly.
Look at MY skin,
It is DARK and it is BEAUTIFUL!
How could I ever be trapped?
I am black.

I am in no way white,
Nor do I ever want to be.
I am black
And black is beautiful

I can be very quiet.
Sometimes, I'm so quiet, I don't utter a word.
I stay here, oh so quietly.
Listening to you mutter your sins.
I listen, oh so patiently.
And comfort your hurt within.
And I wait, oh so desperately.
For my turn to release my burdens.
But by the time your done
And I'm ready to not be, oh so quiet
You smile and leave.
Satisfied from leaving your troubles with another.
And I want, oh so badly
To let go of all I know.
But you've left, oh so quickly
Completing the give and take.
I give and give and you take and I lose all  hope in an even exchange.
So the cycle starts again, and I'm oh so ready to let go.
But by the time they're done repenting,
I'm still left with all I know.

I’m all sharp edges and she’s contours
hills, valleys
soft skin on loud bones

She’s turning me soft but
she says she likes me better that way.
she doesn’t want ribcages, thigh gaps, logic
she wants feelings, hushed whispers, curves

she’s slowly teaching me that skinny girls are
nice to look at but they can’t hold on when you push them away
.
She refuses to realize that sometimes
some things are better left unsaid
.
I am afraid and she’s warm and
i’m shivering inside and out.
i’m bruising, perfect shades of purple
my neck and my knuckles and my heart

i don’t even know what i wanted but it’s
too late now she’s
breaking me.

i always wanted to be in love
but not like this.

She’ll be lovely. You’ll be able to count the spaces in between her ribs. She’ll have thin skin and it’ll be so easy to drive her crazy with just a single touch. It’ll be easy to make your mark on her, too. She’ll bruise easy and love it. She’ll think it’s beautiful.

2. She won’t ever be expensive on dates because all she’ll order is a salad. You’ll never have to worry about her ordering an expensive steak. You might have to worry about emergency room bills when she passes out, but she’ll never ask for anything else. All she’ll want is ***** and sleeping pills.

3. She will always put you first. Your needs always come before hers because she was raised “God first, others second, I am third”. She’ll make you hot chocolate and drive to your house at 3 AM with pizza she won’t eat, even though she’s dead tired and all she wants is a good night’s rest. You can count on her to be there.

4. She will tell you that you are perfect. She’ll believe it, too. Everyone around her seems to be perfect and she’s drowning under the weight of mediocrity but it’s ok as long as you know how perfect you are.

5. She’ll always have scissors and pencil sharpeners on hand. The knives in her kitchen are always sharpened to perfection and if you forget your razor at home, it’s ok. She has extras in her closet.

6. She’ll ******* anytime you want. As long as you don’t look at her while she’s getting undressed, she’ll love you until she can’t breathe anymore. She’ll smile as you kiss her thighs because you’re the only one that makes her feel beautiful.

7. Date a girl who hates herself because she’ll love you.

I love you all, here on Hellopoetry.
Without you. I wouldn't know where I'd be, or even who I'd be.
Thank you.