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Mar 9 · 72
Yesterday I died
Yesterday I died
Just not how I'd thought
I just gave a seat to a guy on a crowded bus

Yesterday I died
When I could have fought
But showed grace to a friend that I trust

Yesterday I died
When I swallowed pride
And called my dad after our last fight

Yesterday I died
When I stayed up and tried
To pray with my savior through the night

Yesterday I died
When instead of giving in
I called up a friend and confessed my sin

Yesterday I died
When I let you win
And picked up the word again

Today I lied
Because yesterday I did none of those things
I am very much alive
Not crucified with my king
I heard him whisper each of these things
But I ignored
If today my death knell rings
And I stand before... Him

Will he say well done?
At least you believed and tried.

Or say yesterday, you died...
Dec 2019 · 87
Today
I left my heart the April when I met you
Just a Friday evening when I finally came to
I'd known your voice all those years
Drowned them out with my fear
And then somehow your word broke through

Like a **** in the crack in the street
I shouldn't be here but your voice swept over me
You told me the things that I feared
Things my heart bloomed to hear
And in that moment my soul found peace

It's a miracle that I'm even here
That your love opened my closed ears
After all of this time
The cross still shines so clear
Like the day your love first drew me near

Then that first December with you came like a flood
I saw my family in tears and tasted blood
My heart was hardened by fear
But then your love flowed in here
And forgiveness rose up from the mud

It's a miracle that I'm even here
That your love opened my closed ears
After all of this time
The cross still shines so clear
Like the day your love first drew me near

It seemed like just another Sunday in May
But then your spirit came in like autumn rain
Out of season without reason
And suddenly I was a son
Or realized what I was all along

It's a miracle that I'm even here
That your love opened my closed ears
After all of this time
The cross still shines so clear
Like the day your love first drew me near

Though the months and days keep flowing past
Looking back I guess I thought this phase would pass
But Jesus you never end
When my faith dies you rise again
And I know are always my forever friend

It's a miracle that I'm even here
That your love opened my closed ears
After all of this time
The cross still shines so clear
Like the day your love first drew me near
Like every day when you draw me near
Like today cause I know you're right here.
Dec 2019 · 56
Hymn
Oh thunders roll and stormy sprays
Weigh down my soul and doubt prevails
But your control like sunny days
Rise in me like the morning
It is your love that's dawning

Each flooding grief my heart can brace
Relief the thief cannot erase
It is belief and sovereign grace
That rises like the morning
Your love in me is dawning

Death's shadow looms and strength retreats
Under the gloom of pain complete
But from my doom, death shall retreat
I'll rise up like the morning
Your life in me is dawning

Death doubt and strife, filled to the brim
Was all drunk dry, and died so grim
So life on life I'll rise in Him
And rise up like the morning
Your light in me is dawning
Sep 2019 · 762
Rebel King
Rebel son
Born in the shadow
A fire in the hollow of night

You're the reason
That the angel's are singing
To terrified shepherd's tonight

Oh they did not know
And we don't still
That you came below
For your will fulfilled
Caused us to be saved
From ourselves and the grave
We will sing
To our rebel king

Rebel priest
Baptized in the river
By the one who you soon would save

You loved the least
Like your own sons and daughters
Like your blood flowed through their veins

Rebel love
That raises the standard
Changes our hearts from within

You are above
Sickness couldn't touch you
You healed us out and within

Oh we did not know
And we don't still
That you came below
For your will fulfilled
Caused us to be saved
From ourselves and the grave
We will sing
To our rebel king

Rebel king
betrayed by a brother
Led out like a lamb to be slain

Torn skin
Until you didn't look human
You bore our shame and our pain

Without sin
You were tried as a rebel
Innocent and you bore our shame

We thought you'd win
But you died like a rebel
Bearing our sin and our shame

Every curse and blow
Every blood drop spilled
Oh the thorn torn brow
Oh the life I killed
But then death rebelled
And the grave did too
As the dead broke free
By your death renewed
And your life cries out
In our very souls
Destroying our doubt
Making broken whole
Let my heart of hearts
And my songs now sing
Lifting holy hands
To my rebel king

I've been blessed to know
And be in your will
Let my life be yours
For your will fulfilled
To be saved and save
From sin and grave
Until my life sings
To my rebel king
Aug 2019 · 73
I'm waiting for a city
I'm waiting for a city where the broken
Are windows that let the light in
Where the pressed are the sweetest wine
Where the torn are stitched into Him
Where the lost are the street signs

Where the economy is grace
Where unity is race
And the currency of mercy
Is minted in every soul

Because every citizen is whole

Our gates open
Our tears dry
Our chains broken
Our joys rise

And never fall
A City, The City, YOur City for all
Aug 2019 · 95
Turn out
Turn out
all of the lights
Burned out
This is what it feels like
Lie down
Spread-out out on the floor

Silence
Nothing is moving
Violence
And my heart is hearing
Voices
I haven't heard before

No light
Left in the dark
No fight
Left in my heart
Tonight
Might be the final time

No place
For shadows to move
No space
Inside the room
Their crowding
Around me to get inside

But I want to say goodbye to you
I want to go away but you
Just keep holding on

The shadows seem bigger than stars
Maybe it's cause they're so far
Or maybe it's cause it's been years since they've been gone
But the light goes on
Maybe it's been years since I've been gone...
Just the shadows go on

Turn out
All of the lights
Till the house
Is like what is inside me
Where did you go?
Little punk that used to feel,
Who challenged what was real
The heart that won't keep quiet

I used to know
The person you'd become
When did you get so numb
And go on autopilot

I don't know if I'm still the enemy
But if I am I already love to hate me
But you want me to love me enough to let go
I don't know if I can become who I was
My back is breaking from all the last straws
Cause I'd hate to love the person I know

As me
Cause me
Is a little bit short of patience
a little bit prone to lie

Cause me '
As me
Is a little bit prone to darkness
The secrets that I hide
That borrow up inside
Until I believe the lies

Can I really change and find
The heart of a warrior in my mind
I don't know
Anymore
But I know
You're more
than I know

You're still like the warrior I used to know
Hands full of scars and a heart full of souls
I'm giving up the facade of control
Into your hands I'll let go.
May 2019 · 64
The girl the wind forgot
Her came from a land without rain.
Where the sun forgot to shine the same.
Born on the savannah where the wind understood.
Those who wander keep nothing good.

Like a seed without roots, that trees forgot.
Her heart set afloat by the freedom she sought.
Snow, rivers, sea, shore.

Her loved her island more by more.
She slept her tears, and listened her fear.
(And this continued many a year.) Her future seemed glad and grim.
And then her heard of him.

Him sounded amusing at worst.
He sang his hope, and laughed his verse.
But as they met, both him and her,
Felt the awkward disappear.

Time went on and so did they.
They laughed their fears they spoke their pain.
Till the wind reminded her one day.
And her first learned the touch of rain.

Shore sea river stream,
Her learned to forget her dreams.
Till all at once, one night she knew.
That him forgot the same dream too.

Stream skies stars streets.
Her journey begun amid complete.
Some guessed if only on a whim.
That his dream was hers, and her dream was him.

Complete amid begun between.
The wind wandered on unseen.
Like anyone and no one before.
They lived their dream more by more.

They sang their wish, and did the same.
Soon they will have the same last name.
The sun remembered to shine again.
Shore sea sky rain.
Love and the mystery of how it finds it's way home.
Apr 2019 · 555
Echo on
Every string that you cut off
You say prunes but I'm no vine
I'm feeling off and out of tune and out of time

Cause all I have is your song
And when the last string is gone
Only dissonance and distance
Echo on echo on echo on

Every instrument you send to play with mine
It outshines, until shadows are the only place to hide,
And I'm inside

Cause all I have is your song
And when the last friend is gone
Only dissonance and distance
Echo on echo on echo on

When the last string is straining, fading, snap,
Will you clap, will applause or pause fill the wake,
Will you take another broken instrument
That failed to play the song you meant
Will you re-write the last movement
So only the song that you meant
Echoes on Echoes on Echoes on
Apr 2019 · 61
Who
Who
Who guides on dark stars that roam,
and taught the moon to hide?
Who calms the blue ocean's roar,
with whispered lullabies?
Mar 2019 · 175
Fair trade
Collapsible lungs
Bendable fingers
Removable teeth
But the pain still lingers
It feels like we weren't made long for this world.

Pluckable eyes
Breakable jaws
If we look past the lies
We know it's because
We know we weren't made long for this world

Carve up your pound of flesh
Take from me my last breath
Cause I'm a stitched up limping mess
And only you can cure my death

Inflatable pride
Debatable truth
Preferable lies
Reimbursable youth
I know I'm not made long for this world.

Surrendered pride
Rendered truth
We rended light
Cause the darkness is cool
I know you weren't long for this world

I Carved up your pound of flesh
Stole from you your last breath
You were a limping bleeding mess
And you carried off my death

The transaction was made
But no one but me
Could say fair trade
And walk away ungrieved
I don't deserve to be long for his world
I don't deserve to be long for his world
Jan 2019 · 143
Harmonics in the heavens
Harmonics in the heavens
We’re waiting here again
For you to speak between the lines that blur where we begin
Your voice it roars like lions
Echoes out like a flood
My voice is drowned beneath the water muddled thick as blood

Oh
My spirit groans
Oh
No words to say
Oh
I know you know
No
One can take that away

There comes the dischords (sin)
Singing of our disgrace (grace)
Grace is your re-word to resolve all of our mistakes
You introduce a phrase
Your music set in words
So beautiful it comes alive and cannot be unheard

Oh
My spirit groans
Oh
Don’t know what to say
Oh
I know you know
No
One can take that away

Harmonics in the heavens
We’re waiting here again
For you to speak between the lines that blur where we begin
Oct 2018 · 352
On this side of the sky
On this side of the sky
The cash before my eyes
Are paper blinds
Over my windows

On this side of my room
I'm hiding in the gloom
It's just easier
In the shadows

But you're the blue up high
The storm in the rain
On this side of the sky
You're the joy in the pain

On this side of the sky
The storm is rising high
There are no silver linings
Except the lightning

I'm running through the storm
My eyes are clouding up
It's blurring out your form
But I'm still searching

You're the blue up high
The storm in the rain
On this side of the sky
You're the joy in the pain

I lift my eyes up
To the mountains
A sunset of bloods
You turned to fountains
Your skies went black
So mine turned blue
On this side of the sky
The light is you

You're the blue up high
The storm in the rain
On this side of the sky
You're the joy in the pain
And when the storms fade
And I fade too
On that side of the sky
My light's still you
Where can we go when we want to see
The things we know we couldn't be
The thing you wanted I couldn't find
The haunted memoirs of my mind

We shrink inside where pain is bottled
Where ink stains the paper rotten
So we wind up and throw it out to sea
Drifts within the shore in me

Departed pushed by the tide
Discarded polluted inside
Smashed on the shore by the storm
Trash always goes back where it came from
Aug 2018 · 88
Tracing
Tracing the lines on a blank page
Lines that were never there
Trying to find my way out of this paper maze
But the page won't tare

You come alive on the page
Your ink stains it red
Your love your pain your hope your rage
It gets into my head

You can't be re-written
Can't be erased
You tear out the ending
And re-write a whole new page
The chapter that would end it all
Starts again
As the hero enters in

The cut out words have been erased
You've taken their place
The story isn't over yet
I'm reading you between the lines
You're the word so new it shines
And flips the story on it's head
I lay down the life I led
You can author me instead
Jul 2018 · 211
Heaven Left to Pay
When I was lost in my way
You knew the day you would call me son
Like the son who ran away
You faithfully stayed cause’ you knew I'd come

You waited for me,
So here I am waiting for you.

Every moment so far has drawn me to your arms
You've worked it all for the good
Every moment that's left I give back to pay a debt
I can't make good on
Cause all I can give, is all you have given
When I give it all back there's still heaven left to pay
So I can gladly give my life away

When I felt orphaned
Abandoned and knew that I had no home
Your love was open
A love that awakened a love all our own

You made room for me
So I am clearing space for you.

Every moment so far has drawn me to your arms
You've worked it all for the good
Every moment that's left I give back to pay a debt
I can't make good on
Cause all I can give, is all you have given
When I give it all back there's still heaven left to pay
So I can gladly give my life away

When my hopes are broken
When I can't lift my hands to you
When my heart is aching
And darkness is all that's in view

I look to the cross
And I see you broken
I look to the cross
I see your hands lifted high
Praying for me
In your final moments
Your heart poured out
Your love lifted high

Here I surrender
Here I lay my life down
Here on the altar
I give you my love lay down my crown

You gave your life for me
So here I give my life for you

Every moment so far has drawn me to your arms
You've worked it all for the good
Every moment that's left I give back to pay a debt
I can't make good on
Cause all I can give, is all you have given
When I give it all back there's still heaven left to pay
So I can gladly give my life away
This is who I was
Lost in who I was meant to be
Found all I was not meant to see
In between you and me

This is who I am
Still picking up my tab
Even the one you said you'd grab
But debts are all I've ever had

This is who you are
You won't let go
Cause your love won't let you
No, you won't let go...

This is where we stand
Inseparably apart
Your love pursues my racing heart
And when it stops is where we start

This is where we fall
Half way to where you are
Slipped as I start to pass the falling star
At least the ground is not as far

This is who you are
You won't let go
Cause your love won't let you
No, you won't let go...

If this is all this is
I just want you to know
I know you loved me more
More than love could ever know
Jun 2018 · 182
Grace not to choose
Laying down stones,
Building up walls
First comes the temple,
It's not that tall

Invest in foundations that nobody sees
I hope it's enough to get you to me

I have a thousand lovers
You're the only one I want
From a thousand vices
You're the only good I won't
I know they're bad for me, and you're really good
At setting me free from all that I would, not loose...
When i'm this broke, give me the grace not to choose.

Here in my mansion
The walls are so high
You need Jacob's ladder
Just to get inside

There's a hundred rooms just to explore
Ignore the thousands where I've locked the door

You need a place
Take mine
If you need a voice
Take mine
If you take me
In every moment
I might not give myself away
Jun 2018 · 110
K e e p u s a p a r t
The only think that can keep us apart
Is right here with me
Separating my self from my heart
Until you see

You can't keep us apart
You can take the me out of what I mean
You can't take the I out what's mine

But you can take what you've see, and make it shine
And let the black slip into the back of your mind
Because the only thing that can keep us apart is me
Jun 2018 · 121
The Willow and the Wall
There's a place we used to hide
Between the willow and the wall
It wasn't very wide
Barely a place at all

But you were there, and I was there and no one ever knew
No one could have known what love would do to me and you

They cut the willow down
When they sold our home
The roots deep in the ground
Cracked the wall of stone

And you're not there, but I'm still here and no one knows
And you're not there, but I'm still here and no one knows

And I'm imagining and trying not to of who we used to be
The day we ran away to just go walking by the sea
It's raining so hard in this house that I might drown
Can't remember when we were last around
The willow and the wall are crumbling down

You used to call me your safe place
And you didn't need to smile
I felt tall and strong
Lord it's been a while

I'm still in love with the person that you used to be
And you're sitting there wondering what happened to me

There's a place we used to hide
Between the willow and the wall
It wasn't very wide
Barely a place at all

I'm still waiting for you there, where the leaves are falling
I'm still waiting for you there, where the leaves are falling


And I'm imagining and trying not to of who we used to be
The day we ran away to just go walking by the sea
Now it's raining so hard in this house that I might drown
Can't remember when we were last around
The willow and the wall are crumbling down

We are the rock and the hard place
Our love is caught between
I'm the wall holding you back
But your heart is evergreen
I'm learning that love can be more than out and in
The willow and the wall are coming down

And I'm imagining and trying not to of who we used to be
The day we ran away to just go walking by the sea
The walls coming down give room to grow
To the only love I've ever known
The willow and the wall are crumbling down
Apr 2018 · 141
Paramedic
You found me east of the park
Just after dark
When the sky was still dyed red

No sign of external abuses
Just bruises
From my heel to my head

You knew you'd postpone this death
Though I didn't want to be
You drew your own life breath
And breathed into me
I rolled and choked on life as it stung
Air cold broke like a knife to the lungs

I looked into eyes I'd never known,
And saw a debt I could never own.
But you just smiled and sent me home.
Mar 2018 · 223
The second day
Today gravity gave way
The lost finally flew home
You led them on parade
From your grave to your throne

The bolted gates gave way
On both the sides of death
And she was dismayed
As she took her final breath

Oh... The day between dark and life
Oh... The day between death and light
Where the world thought all was lost,
and you left death double crossed

Oh... we took a sabbath's rest
Oh... while you overcame the test
Our works for heaven done,
the lamb of God has overcome.

They thought the light went out
It was just shining underground
You'll clear all of their doubts
When tomorrow comes around

The day before today
They ran from where you died
Soon they'll be running to the grave
To take their places at your side

Oh... The day between dark and life
Oh... The day between death and light
Where the world thought all was lost,
and you left death double crossed

Oh... we took a sabbath's rest
Oh... while you overcame the test
Our works for heaven done,
the lamb of God has overcome.

We are the second man
On the second day
Every second we're here
Till he comes again
Is all for his glory

Oh... The day between dark and life
Oh... The day between death and light
Where the world thought all was lost,
and you left death double crossed

Oh... we took a sabbath's rest
Oh... while you overcame the test
Our works for heaven done,
the lamb of God has overcome.
Easter is coming
Mar 2018 · 116
I'm never gonna find home
You took one step closer
and two steps back
well if it's over
you can't go back

Look over your shoulder
It's still a fact
When it's over
You can't go back

Who do you think you are
Who do you think you scarred
Who do you think fell for who
Who do they say I am
You'll never understand
Just who walked away from whom

I took one step closer
Two steps back
Still going nowhere
That's a fact

Ooh I'm never gonna get home

One step closer
To where I was
Still going nowhere that's because
Ooh... I know I've never been home

Who do you think you are
Who do you think you scarred
Who do you think is falling for who
Who do they say I am
You'll never understand
Just who walked away from whom

One step closer
Two steps back
Still going nowhere
That's a fact

Ooh I'm never gonna get home
You're never gonna get home
We're never gonna get home
Feb 2018 · 88
Half full
Your skin feels like whiskey
And I'm thirstin' for a taste
I'm dying to touch and see
How much before I waste
The sense to know purpose
But I can feel your preface
Slip between the surface
Beneath drunk and awake
Hear our heart beats shake
Like ice spins in liquid fire
And cools the heart's desire
Between skin and sin we pull
**And sink the cup that is half full
Feb 2018 · 132
You are the star on my hand
I
Found
You shining
Like crystal at noon
And you lit up my room
And put rainbows on my walls
Until I didn't feel my heart
Was as cold as a stone
The beats started
To drone and
Sing of
you
&
I
Jan 2018 · 101
I think that you're lost
He sat in the periphery of his own life
(And asked 'are you okay?')
And he didn't know how to answer
Or who was asking for that matter

(Why won't you go away)
He whispered back to himself
And sat in silence

Outside and within
And watched the red light
Flicker across the window pane
(Am I okay)
He asks himself,
Really meaning, will things ever change.
Jan 2018 · 87
The Light Inside
Her hands were tired creased with lines that ceased to feel and felt to find the things that warmed the skin and lit her fingers crimson.
Like when she was ten and hid a torch in her hand to feel the warmth of light, and marvel at the light inside.

But the batteries have died,
The light's burnt out.
Her hands have gone numb.

The heat of the dawn and she closes her eyes to the sun, (was the sky ever this bright?) She looks through closed eyes at the crimson gold and flecks of dust, and touches her cheeks.

Warmth, was always within.
And her her eyes try to cool the flame,
as her fingers tingle.
Jan 2018 · 80
Untitled
Amidst a world of wires
Towers and satellites we wait
We're playing with desire and deciding our fate
Jan 2018 · 100
My patch of sky
There is a patch of sky
That I know better
Than any student of the weather

I know every mood
And every color
From grey brood
To amber wonder

Musing whiffs
of white and grey
Purple pride
That fades away


But the sky was never mine
The storms go rolling by
The Mornings turn to blue
The afternoon tired sighs
Noons scorching golden hues
The thunder roars and fades
And blackness veils it all
As the stars and moon parade

You are my patch of sky
Amidst the joy and pain
I love watching our lives
Shine as the weathers change
And when the night is nigh
Our memories like stars
Remind me that this sky
Was never mine but ours.
Nov 2017 · 246
Open Casket
Open Casket.

Letting the grains slip away through my fingers
The dust never settles the pain only lingers
It still feels like we never closed the door on this

You were afraid that the wound never heals
Then you moved on to a place that’s too real to be
True in my hollowing heart, can I follow you from the dark

Bury me with my casket open
Cause’ my bones were never broken
Just out of joint, but that’s not the point
You never let continents keep us apart
What’s six feet of earth between eternal hearts
You must be joking, Jump on in the caskets still open.

Cotton and lace I want all of the frills
If life is a lesson then death is a thrill
Who ever said that there is no hope for the dead (to find love)

If you’re still afraid that the wound doesn’t heal
Put your hand on my heart you’ll see that the promise is real
There is peace right in there but it still wants a piece of you
Bury me with my casket open
Cause’ my bones were never broken
Just out of joint, but that’s not the point
You never let continents keep us apart
What’s six feet of earth between eternal hearts
You must be joking, Jump on in the caskets still open.

The grains slip away
It never changes and you’re still afraid
That my heart will re-arrange the truth
Bury your doubts
In cotton and lace
Til’ you can’t get out
The grains slip away
It never changes and you’re still afraid
That my heart will re-arrange the truth
Bury your doubts
In cotton and lace
Til’ you can’t get out
But just trust me on the other side
You’ll see me
You will see the light
You will know that the truth was always inside
Bury me with my casket open
Cause’ my bones were never broken
Just out of joint, but that’s not the point
You never let continents keep us apart
What’s six feet of earth between eternal hearts
You must be joking, Jump on in the caskets still open.
Oct 2017 · 910
Fly again
As the drizzle begins
The butterfly hides
Because paper
Cannot glide
When wet
Fall

When the clouds roll storms come
We put pain aside
Cold makes us numb
And pain dies
Forget
All
Paper hearts will dry
Lighter hearts will fly
Sep 2017 · 242
Be my God
Be a thief and rob my sin
Your squatting my heart anyway
My rebel chief, usurp my king
I never liked me anyway

Be my jealous one and cull my lust
Until my heart beats for you
The surgeon I place my eyes and trust
That you'll blind all else from view

Be the thorn in my weary flesh
When the spirit is willing to work
Be the scorn that will refresh
When my heart is about to shirk

Be the door closed when I want my way
Over the the path you've trod
Be my fatal dose when my faith might sway
And when life's over be my God.
Sep 2017 · 268
I won't survive you
I see your voice and feel your eyes
In the void between my skies and soul

In the gap where life denies
In the wound between broken and whole

You're inexplicable but I can explain
That your touch doesn't look the same
Your silence will not sustain
I can feel you call my name
And it's just beyond view
But I see you're doing something new

There where your bones meet mine
Where blood washes through

In that war between the divine
I feel you breaking through

You're inexplicable but I can explain
That your touch doesn't look the same
Your silence will not sustain
I can feel you call my name
And it's just beyond view
But I see you're doing something new

Here's my altimatum
If you want my life so good
Make silence my anthem
Cause only you could
Make gentleness my fist
And forgiveness my kiss
Until I can't resist
Cause I will resist
A new heart
Set apart
Solid
Without I
Sold
I must die

You're inexplicable but I can explain
That your touch doesn't look the same
Your silence will not sustain
I can feel you call my name
And it's just beyond view
But I see you're doing something new
And I hope I don't survive you.
Aug 2017 · 146
Hide and seek
If you're looking for me
I'm not here anymore
Go back to the place
You found me before

It's all in the details
I heard somebody lied
All I heard was a hiss
Now I'm dead inside

Can you find me
Can you find me
Can you find me
I'm hiding here

Now it's been so long
Waiting to be found
I might as well be buried
6 feet under ground

I am feeling you digging
You better be find me soon
Cause my death is growing
And it will soon bloom

Can't you find me
Can't you find me
Can't you find me
I'm dying here

If I ran to the ends of the morning
You would surely be there
But I'm covered in the black of the night
And it feels like you disappear

Where can I run from your presence?
Where can a mere mortal hide?
When you took all my sinfulness
And laid it bear on the cross crucified

There you'll find me
There you'll find me
There you'll find me
I was forgiven here

If you're looking for me
I'm not here anymore
Go back to the place
You found me before
Aug 2017 · 225
The song you'll never hear
I thought our love was evergreen
Ever seen an evergreen fade
I cleared your things with gasoline
With gasoline until the garden was greyed

Well the smoke curled like your hair
But it's gone
And I've been teary eyed here
Too long

Goodbye
I hope you never see the tears
I tried
To hide them all these years
Not that you care
That I'm singing it from here
Goodbye
From a song you'll never hear

I watched the clock to pass the time
At last it seems our time has run dry
Your love it tastes like alkaline
Poisoning the earth once it dies

Well we were like a battery
That drained
The toys are all gone but well
Poison remains

Goodbye
I hope you never see the tears
I tried
To hide them all these years
Not that you care
That I'm singing it from here
Goodbye
From a song you'll never hear
Aug 2017 · 286
High on our fate
Your eyes are the sweetest kiss of all
Your smiles are the brightest list of small
sweet thing, that keep me singing
And stringing musicals out in the rain

It's the kiss in the touch of your hand
In the cookies burned in the baking pan
crying one batch went bad
But I see you're not sad over coffee and cards

You're the gasoline to my spark
The sand to my toes
The ravine in my heart
That nobody knows
You're the river that carves out
The shivers and doubt
And finds that the ocean can wait
Buried in sky we're satisfied -high on our fate

You remember the words I forgot
That December my heart was in knots
that it tied down the three words
I'd known you deserved but you let it go

I remember the letters I burned
The tear etched pages I turned
Around into long-winded prose
For my long distance hopes in your arms

You're the scene to my art
The sand to my toes
The ravine in my heart
That nobody knows
You're the river that carves out
The shivers and doubt
And finds that the ocean can wait
Buried in sky we're satisfied - high on our fate.
Jul 2017 · 203
Sleep
I'm on the edge of awake and asleep
And the blade is pressed below my eyes
Hard enough to bruise but not to break
Soft enough that I can't sleep and I'm not awake
Jul 2017 · 375
Patience
Waiting is difficult
But it is essential
Love too soon or too late
May never become love at all
Act too soon on your anger
And you will regret your call
But if you wait the hate will subside
And love will guide your actions

All I'm saying is that patience
Is a harvest sewn and waited for
That reaps a crop greater than the field
One that cannot be stored but produces a yield
Ten, Hundred, Thousand fold the time thrown away
And that time thrown away is never wasted
Because as the watchman waits for the dawn
When morning comes, he breathes a deep sigh
And smiles as the light warms his face and soothes his sore eyes
Patience proved right produces insight
That waiting can be for gain
Above all else what remains
We learn to cope
With man's most powerful curse
Hope

And nothing could be better or worse.
What makes an athlete great?

Is it the shoes or the pace
The coach or their grace
The time it takes to finish the race?
Is it the hours in the gym
The drive just to win
Or the people cheering for her or for him.
Is it the desire
That un-bottled fire
That rages and urges us faster and higher
But who bought them the shoes
Thought them not to lose
Picked them up when they were tired and bruised
Yes I crossed the line
I put in the time
But they all came together to make victory mine.
Every athlete carries the hopes of the people who helped them
And it’s the only weight they carry, that makes them faster.
Jul 2017 · 252
Do they hear me?
I hear the stars sing
And still the night with song
A song so loud
It makes the world still

And as the cold wind blows
The warmth I feel
Is warmer than the sun
Or a lover's arms

And their light leaves the night
Dark and cool
But fills my eyes with a light
Only those who look deep enough can see

I hear the stars
And whisper back
And wonder through the void
If they hear me
Jul 2017 · 299
The back of the bus
I sat in the back of the bus,
And I knew every day he would come
With some new joke for us
Some quip about how dumb we were
I can still hear the laughter

And if I raised my hand
It would be twisted and turned
Until my eyes burned and
The pain was returned
Two fold, and my heart was scorching hot and freezing cold.

Too hot to be silent too cold to move
And one day I proved
Enough was enough
And beat him until he cried
Until my rage was satisfied
And his was forced to subside to fear

Now he sits in the back of the bus
And he knows every day I will come
With some new joke
To poke the wounds I made
That he gave me
Of which neither of us will ever be free

If only I'd said sorry.
Jul 2017 · 188
Still the light grows
I am witness to the light
And called to shine
In spite of the shadows inside.

I am called light
But the shadow I call mine
Makes my light hide

Where my flesh is whole
My soul is shadowed
Where you wound me it shows

Thus your life I stole
Burns out my marrow
And still the light grows

I am witness to the light
And still the light grows
Jun 2017 · 186
Broken Mirror
The mirror is broken
And I don't know why
The pieces are stained in red

And it seems the reflection
From the shards left by
Match the image left in my head

Was it one too many failures
One too many falls
Or too much compromise?

Was it that I took a leisurely
Lazy call
With consequences I didn't realize?

Now my eyes can't see themselves
All they see is shadows
And no one really sees a shadow
Until it looks back at themself

I see my shadow in my reflection
And I'm afraid of the dark
Jun 2017 · 161
Love is enough
I don't know what to say when I'm with you
Words pale and fail to say what my heart knows

I try to raise my voice, but it trickles into nothing more than words.

My spirit's longing but my heart is cold and silent
Turned to stone from years of giving up the fight

I try to make a choice to love you, but I've always said those words

I've wronged you
I'm sorry
I don't know if I can change
But I need you
I'm desperate
I know your the only way
I can love
And be loved
And find that maybe love is enough

I keep thinking of all the times before this
Blaming you or me for how I just can't change

I'll try to look beyond, so my love goes beyond only words.

I still feel the shadow creeping up inside me
But I also feel your life breaking through

I know this heart will fail but please prevail, please be more than words

I've wronged you
I'm sorry
I don't know if I can change
But I need you
I'm desperate
I know your the only way
I can love
And be loved
And find that maybe love is enough

To change a heart
To change my life
From wandering darkness
To living light
Than can warm hearts
And light lives up
More than words
But changed inside

I've wronged you
I'm sorry
I don't know if I can change
But I need you
I'm desperate
You're the only way
I can love
And be loved
And my heart knows that love is enough
(When times get rough)
My heart knows your love enough
(When I fall)
My heart knows your love enough
(When I'm weak)
My heart knows your love is enough
(When I'm lost)
My heart knows you love is enough
Jun 2017 · 149
Walking with you
You're calling me where I can't go
I'll run into the hollow
Of the tree
Please don't follow me

You're sending me where I can't dream
I'm so afraid I want to scream
I'm leaving
don't follow me

But where can I hide
Where you don't provide
Where can I go
Where you don't know
Running from you is like running from myself
But the only way to follow is to leave myself
There's no paths left to choose,
I guess I'll be walking with you

I've made every excuse I can
I've told you I'm not who you need
But you still follow me

You say that you are
You say that I am who you need,
Yeah you still follow me

But where can I hide
Where you don't provide
Where can I go
Where you don't know
Running from you is like running from myself
But the only way to follow is to leave myself
There's no paths left to choose,
I guess I'll be walking with you
Jun 2017 · 227
Light again
Oh hey the sky is blue again
All different hues of blues
And the clouds they fade away
The grey has washed away

Oh hey, Hi! it's you again
We're all different hues of blues
But the clouds just fade away
When I see your face

And when it's dark you're the silver lining
And I hope that I'm yours too
You're the sky, when the world's so black it's blinding
I look up at you
And I'm reminded
Light will come again

You've got me convinced
That forever is forever
The future is a journey
Where we are always we

I've never thought how since
This forever is forever
The man I used to be didn't hesitate or contemplate
That kissing you would be the death of me

And when it's dark you're the silver lining
And I hope that I'm yours too
You're the sky, when the world's so black it's blinding
I look up at you
And I'm reminded
Light will come again
May 2017 · 314
More than love
She says I don't understand what it means to be alone
I guess that's been true since the day I met her
She sat out in the storm on her own
And as I watched her I knew she was wrong

She always said the wind reminded her of home
Until I asked her to stay
I knew she was a rebel but how could I have know
That she would turn away
That she would run away

Nothing hurts more
Than standing at the shore
Watching a horizon
As the sky opens
Wishing you weren't on the other side
And I'm numb
Nothing hurts more than love

And she's off on another adventure
Somewhere between the lines
And I'm here trying to find where we were
somewhere between the lies

She's sitting at home in silence
And I'm walking in the rain
It's more than the distance
I guess somethings do change

Nothing hurts more
Than standing at the shore
Watching a horizon
As the sky breaks opens
Wishing you were still on my side
And I'm numb
Nothing hurts more than love

And I'm sitting out in the cold on my own
I never felt this way before I met her
I understand what it means to be alone
And I guess I will forever

Nothing hurts any more
I'm standing at the shore
Watching a horizon
And the sky's broken
Wishing you weren't on the other side
And I'm numb
Nothing hurts more than love
May 2017 · 303
The stars blur
I'm lyin under the stars.
Talking to myself
And suddenly I remember you
I remember all the scars
The years up on the shelf
The lines you tied to me that pulled me through.

But you never knew the lion
You only knew the lamb
And maybe that's for the best
But I remember how you were cryin'
And I'll never understand
Why God always makes us fail our last test.

And I'm lyin' under the stars
Counting the scars in the ceiling
I'm trying not to think
You might have never made it through
As far as the earth is from the heavens
My thoughts are chasing after you
And as I wonder where you are
Suddenly the stars fade from view.

You lulled me to sleep
With stories I would keep
Even if the details kind of blurred
And I remember I heard
In more than just words
That love could over come a broken world

And I'm lyin' under the stars
Counting the scars in the ceiling
I'm trying not to think
You might have never made it through
As far as the earth is from the heavens
My thoughts are chasing after you
And as I wonder where you are
Suddenly the stars fade from view.

The hand that held me up
Shivered as it fell
And I just stood there saying it would pass
I never should have let that moment pass

And I'm lyin' under the stars
Counting the scars in the ceiling
I'm trying not to think
You might have never made it through
As far as the earth is from the heavens
My thoughts are chasing after you
And as I remember your eyes
All the sugar coated lies
I remember your smile
And those long homeward miles
I remember how you cried
Years after grand pa died
I remember holding your hand
And me trying to understand
How something once so strong
Could shiver too
I prayed but I could not believe it was true
That you...

I remember your eyes
And suddenly the stars blur from view.
May 2017 · 647
You get it!
You get it...
And that's what I love about you
You get it
Yeah you still roll your eyes, but you don't narrow them
You see the disguised ideas and shadow them

To me it's just numbers
Gestures at the air with hand
They don't make sense, but they're beautiful.

But then you have it in a book.
You make sense of
My nonsense
You call it arithmetic

And what I say in my sleep
You keep through your days

In so many ways.
You get me.

And your prize!
Is you get me.
May 2017 · 226
Red
Red
If you are reading this
You know nothing of me.
People who know me, know I hate being red.

If you are reading this
You think nothing of me.
Because I misspelled read as red.

If you are reading this
Know that I think nothing of me.
Because the thought of you reading this makes me red.

If you are reading this.
Know nothing of me.
For all I am will one day be red.
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