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Jun 2012 · 760
Give me an explanation
The last time we spoke,
I forced a smile.
Forced myself to say hello.
No eye contact.
From 6 feet away.
Even though I know,
your smile was fake.
BANG
That string holding my heart together,
explodes.
And the past 3 months
I'd spent
Forgetting every touch
Every love
completely disappeared.
Both smiles were forced.
I wish I knew
the explanation
behind his.
I know we both know,
What's behind mine.
May 2012 · 914
February 15th, 2012
are you

still there?

I’m sorry I’ve kept you wondering,
Sorry that I can’t be
what you wanted.

are you

still there?

I’m sorry I’ve kept you waiting,
Believe me I’ve been waiting
a lifetime and a half for this to end.

are you
still there?

Because I feel so alone now,
so broken how,
Can you go on without feeling?
Without breathing and thinking?

are you
still there?

I think I know now.
Presently, I am alone,
But once you were always with me.
May 2012 · 663
A haiku for Mom
Lifting; You raise me,
My entire life to you,
Forever in debt.
May 2012 · 1.2k
May 11th 2012
I can hear the wind chimes,
and it keeps time,
Like it's giving me a sign,
a way to find,
What will happen next.

The sunlight on the trees,
Just right and glistening,
Makes me want everything I see,
to stay and keep me company,
forever in this moment.

On my table I see raindrops,
The sun is out, the rain's stopped,
From each leaf the rain hops,
Drips and drops,
I wish it would continue.

I can still hear the wind chimes,
You, once, were mine,
But so you know after all this time,
I'm afraid I will never find,
somebody like you.
May 2012 · 2.6k
420 Haiku
About to light up,
Wait just another minute,
Now it's Four Twenty.
May 2012 · 513
Limited
So limited,
Yet living so free,
Give me a reason not to be,
I am what I am,
And you can,
Take my hand,
And leave me the way others have done.
I'm limited,
But it won't stop me,
Won't slow me,
Won't sadden me,
For I do not stress,
Over what I cannot change,
I can't change who I am,
Though sometimes I wish I could,
I'll never forgive,
The one,
Who limited,
Me.
But I won't ever,
Let it,
Define me.
May 2012 · 907
Make up your mind(song)
(Verse 1)
Guess I just wasn't it for you,
had me waiting around, set me up to lose,
Don't know what I expected from you,
Just a little understanding,
You're taking your time with putting me down,
And I guess I'm still trying to figure you out,
But I think I'm sorta over it now,
Just gotta steady my rocky landing,

(prechorus)
I keep trying to find my bearings here,
But it's hard when you just disappear,
Honey I don't have the patience,
So don't you keep me waiting,

(Chorus)
So make up your mind,
I keep running out of reasons to give you more time,
Maybe you're already gone,
And you didn't have the ***** to tell me all that was goin on,
All I know is the thing that's tough,
is knowing I won't be good enough,
for your love, so baby
Please be friendly
I'm not looking for love,
but my heart is on empty,

(Verse 2)
You haven't spoken one **** word to me,
And I understand you need time to think,
But I didn't think it'd take you weeks,
Guess it wasn't worth it,
I thought I knew you better than that,
Such a strong connection when we met,
Didn't think you'd wanna leave just yet,
But then again you were a little *******,

(prechorus)
I keep trying to find my bearings here,
but it's hard when you just disappear,
I don't have the patience,
So don't you keep me waiting,

(chorus)
So make up your mind,
I don't wanna keep wondering if you will be mine,
Maybe I want you gone,
And it's good that we didn't work it out,
So now I can move on,
All I know is what's gunna ****,
is thinking I'm not really good enough,
to keep you,
but baby I won't fight fate,
and when you realize I'm gone it'll be too late,
I realize now I don't need your love,
but that doesn't mean you can set me up,
and make me think,
this would actually work,
I'll find someone else who will see my worth,

So open your eyes,
and try to realize, how much you lost this time,
I won't be back here again,
I'm sick of you, and I can't believe,
that we couldn't even be friends,
All I know is what I'm gunna do,
and that's find someone thats ******* better than you,
and I, know now, that somehow,
I'll find my guy,
and he won't think twice.
Make up your mind.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6JZz48BUHME&feature;=g-upl
May 2012 · 385
May 2nd 2012
It was like the clouds had read my mind,
They all had started to get in line,
to swim across the open sky,
close up the holes, and shield your eyes,

I wanted the sunlight to go away,
Turn back time to another day,
The clouds continue and do not cease,
Not one bit of sunshine, not one piece,

And as the blue turns into gray,
I lift my head and start to pray,
I still feel warmth despite the cold,
Too young to die, for someone so bold.
May 2012 · 998
RIP
RIP
You're so close to me,
And yet you feel so far,
Gone much too soon,
and that's the hardest part.

I can't believe the fact,
That you've left this world for good,
I wish I'd spent more time with you,
And hugged you when I could.

Your smile lit up the nighttime,
Your frown dimmed the brightest of days,
You left for once but not for good,
I'll see you in a better place.

You had so much to live for,
You always exuded such life,
No matter how dark the times,
You could always find the light.

You may not be here anymore,
But you'll always be in my heart,
No matter how far away you may seem,
We'll never be apart.
Apr 2012 · 598
Third times a charm
For awhile,
I thought it would actually work,
I truly believed myself,
I tricked myself into thinking that,
You would like me just enough,
That I would be Just good enough,
to tell you my secret,
and have you still like me,
My face is strong in company,
but quietly,
You'll see,
tears will fight their way,
onto my face, forever etched, will forever stay,
I can't be cured.
Can't be loved, won't be heard,
not much worth, too hurt,
to try anymore, given the situation,
and the situations inflation,
I can expect no less, not one to impress,
I'm okay with being alone.
I know I'll have me. And I'll never
Let me down
a third time.
Apr 2012 · 620
Patience
I don't need you
To tell me I'm not good enough
Who do you think you are?

Do you honestly, truly, believe,
that you're better than what I give,
you have no battle scars?

And who are you,
to make me wait,
So patiently, for your decision?

I don't wait, don't trip,
don't need your ****,
you act like I need to be forgiven.

Never once did I ask for this,
This is just the hand
I was dealt,

It's my life I have to live,
And I won't live it for anybody else.
Apr 2012 · 495
May 1st 2012
If you'd just give me a chance,
one shot to prove myself,
I'll show you I'm worth it,
Unlike anybody else,
I can be what you've wanted,
What you've been searching for,
If you'd only let me,
It can be just like before,
Before I opened my big mouth,
But it's part of who I am,
A part of me I've grown to hate,
I wish you'd understand.
Apr 2012 · 353
Wake me up
Wake me up,
When I can be free,
From this wretched body,
That's restraining me,

Wake me up,
When I can go home,
and be loved by somebody,
Or not be alone,

Wake me up,
When this pain will go away,
Please don't be afraid of me,
Please promise you'll stay,

Wake me up,
When I've slept through all of this,
I tried to be worth it for you,
But it seems I won't be missed.
Apr 2012 · 837
March 18th, 2011
I watched your hands run through my hair,
and I knew you had me, right then and there,
You kept me going long with your lies,
I know I shouldn't be quite so surprised,
but once I had a bit, I knew I'd never have enough,
That's what made losing you so mother ******* tough,
I know you're not really gone from me yet,
It's just an inkling inside me, I feel you regret,
The time we've spent and how close we got,
Or how close I got, you never even fought,
To keep me with you but I'll try not to notice,
Try to be hopeful and try to keep focus,
on keeping you happy, and maybe you'll stay,
And If I try hard enough, You'll love me one day.
Apr 2012 · 1.2k
Quitting today
Been trying to quit smoking,
bout 3 months now,
but the most I can do,
is hardly cut down,
I tried to, cut my losses,
cut off all contact with you,
but when you shoot me a text,
I'll tell ya what I wanna do,

Gunna light up a cigarette,
take a few puffs,
wanna take a few swings,
No, you don't look so tough,
wanna give you just what you deserve,
and take another drag,
maybe I'll just quit tomorrow,
When I'm not feelin' so bad,

I tried to, quit smoking again today,
but then you called me and asked me to come out and play,
and it's, so hard to say no to you,
so I'll light another square, and think what to do,
I said, anything that keeps me from goin' to you,

Light up a cigarette,
and blow the stress away,
It's a sad, sad cure,
when I don't know what to say,
Claim it's my last, no smokin' no more,
then I see you again, and I have a few more.

I have a thousand wishes,
and baby you're at the top of the list,
but I know I shouldn't, I know it's wrong,
So instead, I'll just,
smoke one.

Gunna light up a cigarette
and I'm ready for bad news,
Cos I know that's all I'll ever hear from you,
I know I swore I'd stop,
and break this bad habit for good,
but then I see your face,
and buy another pack like I should.
Apr 2012 · 755
April 13, 2012
I couldn't find love,
So I thought I'd create it,
Didn't think much about it,
So I didn't think to fake it,

Going on in my head,
It played out so nice,
but you didn't feel the same way,
No, not in this life,

I pushed you to love me,
pretended we were fine,
When in reality, there was no 'real',
The relationship was a lie,

You wanted me,
I wanted more,
than to wait until midnight to knock on your door,
You pushed me away,
but I clung to your side,
I knew without you, my dream would die,
So I'll be here alone,
waiting for your 'one day',
but hopefully by then,
I'll be long gone away

I should have thought more about it,
I should have put up my guard,
I hate when that when I'm with you,
that simple task becomes so hard,
But I failed and let it down,
with your, "Let's just be friends,"
you broke my heart so many times,
why not let you do it again?

You wanted me,
I wanted more,
than to wait until midnight to knock on your door,
You pushed me away,
but I clung to your side,
I always meant for life,
when I said "ride or die",
now when you come back, I'll be long gone away,
and here you'll stay, regretting the day, you sent me away,

I put it all on the line for you,
You really ******* me over,
for what it's worth I know I'm better,
I'll find another lover,
But you, you
you are gunna miss me.

You wanted me again,
already out the door,
"Let's be more than friends,"
No honey, not anymore,
I'm passing you now with tears in my eyes,
I loved you once but we were a lie,
Now that you're back, I'm so far gone away,
I'm not coming home, No I'm not going to stay.
Apr 2012 · 1.1k
You're Amazing (song)
I keep waiting,
for the right thing to say,
But baby it's hard,
cos I've never felt this way,
So I'll keep waiting,
but it does me no good,
Cos your hesitation,
Keeps me from thinking I should,
Maybe I don't, understand,
what you're thinking of me,
Maybe I don't, understand,
What you want us to be,

But I'll keep tryin',
No I won't stop tryin',
To say, all the things, I wanna say,
I'm not denyin',
That you are tryin',
But baby, listen to me,
I want you to stay,
I want you to know,
You're amazing.

I keep picturing,
How our life could be,
If only you'd tell me,
How you really feel for me,
Is this just a game to you?
Are you just passing the time?
Maybe I don't wanna know,
As long as you're still mine,

But I keep trying,
No I won't stop trying,
trust me I care way too much,
to be lying,
but don't waste my time,
If you're not feelin' fine,
Just please let me know,
What's on your mind,
I want you to know,
You're amazing.

I don't know what you want from me,
but I know what I want to be,
And baby,
I can't keep pretending,
You only see what you want to see,
If you don't want to be with me,
Then baby,
This is ending,

But I won't stop trying,
Even though you're flying,
Way past me now,
And I'm here cryin',
I can't keep relying on you if you don't,
Know what you're doin',
I want you to stay,
but baby I'm Through with it,
You're out there somewhere and I'm here singing,
You're amazing,
Yeah you're amazing.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wvA4EG4ON3c&feature;=g-upl
Apr 2012 · 526
J.S. (song)
I let you slip right through my fingers,
I watched you leave with no goodbye,
I wish your love for me had lingered,
cos now, I'm stuck here, trying,

To think about what you mean to me,
I mean I know you were always a friend to me,
I miss you so,
Can't believe I let you go,
I never thought that you'd be into me,
so for all this time I stayed friendly,
I gotta let you know,
Friend I'm in love with you,

But it's too late,
You're already gone,
everything reminds me of you,
There must be something wrong,
Everytime I turn around I see you there,
Why'd you have to leave me,
You know that it's not fair,

(For me to)
Think about what you mean to me,
I mean I know you were always a friend to me,
I miss you so,
Can't believe I let you go,
I never thought that you'd be into me,
so for all this time I stayed friendly,
I gotta let you know,
Boy I'm in love with you,

So I guess that's it,
No second chance,
Time to forget all about,
That bad romance,
It's been six months,
and yeah I guess we're friends,
One thing that I've learned from this,
All good things come to an end,

Gotta think about how you just left me,
I mean I knew you were always the enemy,
I hate you so,
Now I'm trying to let you go,
And then I think about all the fun we had,
It was the best **** summer I ever had,
gotta let you know,
Boy I'm in love with you,

Gotta get over you,
Gotta get over you.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V6NDxFS43UI&feature;=g-upl
Apr 2012 · 745
Being me
I knew from the start,
it was a little too good to be true,
but I couldnt help but feel,
all these good vibes from you,
You made me feel so good inside,
but I was hiding something too,
and I just cant help but think,
I was a little too honest, too soon.

'Cause maybe, if I would've waited,
you would have thought that I was worth it,
or maybe, if I had waited,
you'd understand that nobody's perfect,
but maybe if I waited, I would have let it go too far,
I guess I'll be alone forever, but I'm wishin' on that star,

I don't know what I expected,
probably a little heart,
but I just thought it'd be easier
to be honest from the start,
I wish I knew what you were thinkin',
can't seem to let it go,
if you're quick to leave, so might be everybody,
so for now I'll be alone,

and maybe, if I would've waited,
you'd have seen me in a different light,
or maybe, if I had waited,
I would know how to make this right,
but maybe, if I had waited, I might not have said anything at all,
and you'd, be stuck confused, with why I had to stall,

I thought just maybe,
you could see past my flaws,
look at whats underneath my skin,
and know that just because,
I might not be perfect
I'm still pretty good too,
and I know even more that,
I'd be really good with you.

But I'm glad I hadn't waited,
to share this part of me,
and now I know that you won't budge,
no matter how great I may be,
I realize now I don't need you,
nor really anybody,
I'm fine with being alone for now,
because I'm okay with being me.
Apr 2012 · 509
Fate
Softly, in the valley,
Where a boy and girl lay,
a thunderstorm began to brew,
much to their dismay,
Together they tried to run,
but you can't outrun fate,
then his hand slipped out of hers,
by then it was too late

She searched and searched,
but it seemed he was gone,
"Oh why had I insisted he come along,
now the two of us are on our own!",
She spoke to herself, because he was gone.

She walked through the valley,
so overcome with gloom,
and feared that nighttime,
would fall upon her soon,
Again she called out his name,
with tears in her eyes,
but she couldn't even hear herself,
over the strong storm sighs,
Underneath a giant oak tree,
she took shelter and started to wait,
the darkness and wind together again,
reminded her, you can't fight fate.
Apr 2012 · 383
April 2nd 2012
I saw someone who looked like you today,
but I turned my head to look away,
You ****** **** up and left me alone,
I'd rather not think about you today.

I spent time alone and put it away,
Left for awhile, I couldn't stay,
I know I'm being difficult but hey,
It's obvious we can't be friends this way.

— The End —