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chrishambolic Dec 2020
I wrote this poem that i will never let you read.
I'm still sorry for everything i did.
Saw you moved forward and found someone better.
Your smiles we're different now,
not like when we were together.

I pray for you every night;
for your peace, forgiveness and love.
Things I'm not sure i can have.
To the most sincerest soul i ever did met.
Thank you for the memories that i will never forget.
chrishambolic Mar 2021
The sea is full of secrets;
undiscovered lies and deceiving waves--
with an odd lay.
Like a fathomless man which
conceals the most heart-rending tales
And only a few  could sense the depth it owns.

A great consolation--it may seem.
But do not let it's allurement outwit you.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I watched him laugh from a distance
as he held another arm.
I listened to his laughter
which was once a melodious sound to my ears--
but tonight it just bought me in tears.

I watch him laugh, while I cry hello.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
Every one is celebrating,
enjoying the festive evening
with drinks in each hands.
Fireworks and lanterns
made this season much more special.
While i celebrate this night,
with my blankets on  and tears on my cheeks.

Every one is celebrating
while I'm silently dying.
chrishambolic Jan 2021
I'm confuse
angry and sad.
What will i choose?
The wrong thing,
where i am happy
or the right one,
where I'm unfree.

It's confusing...
I'm really confuse right now. I'm stuck between choosing the right and wrong thing :(
chrishambolic Dec 2020
No melodies compares to mine.
Even the saddest song on the radio wont' do,
to a melancholic tune i play every night.
Just a usual sound for people
who lost their will to fight.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I've been rejected
I failed many times
I've taken so many people for granted
I made horrible mistakes
I cried
I almost quit
My circle of friends are now slowly decreasing
I beg for forgiveness
I lied
I cheated
I lost important people in my life
I waited
I loved
and i let go
chrishambolic Dec 2020
Dearest don't you worry you'll live forever.
I'll hide you deep in my heart;
you and i together.
I'll hide you in my paper with ink in my pen,
I'll speak with you through my words 'till we meet again.

Dearest don't you worry you'll live forever in my world,
'cause i hid you inside the poems i wrote.
Dearest you will be remembered;
like how people think of Christmas every December.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
O' dear rain,
you came back just in time.
How did you knew all along
i wasn't fine?
The sound as you pour is a
melody to my ears.
Once again, you never cease
to bring me in tears.

But O' dear rain,
why did you left too soon?
I can no longer hear your
whispers inside my room.
You left me again with no words--
no goodbyes.
Will you be back again if i cry?

O' dear rain you caused me too much pain.
Thought you'd come back just like
we promised.
But you left no trace,
you disappeared and vanished.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
Mourn, as the hour draws near--
I'll soon hear goodbyes.
Mourn, for the last petal from the dying rose fell.
Mourn, for thy time has come.
Mourn, not but a smile;
not but a tear.

I'll mourn,
requiescat in pacem
this is a poem i wrote dedicated to a friend i lost a month ago
chrishambolic Jul 2021
Stare at me once more
and I'll definitely sink,
with that deep-sea eyes and an angelic smile.
'Cause in this crowded room
I'd still look at you the same;
too many people tonight
but i only want to wrap your hands in mine.
So I'll step closer and closer till i get near you.
Till my fingers touch yours
and we'll pretend we don't know.
Were stealing glances with each other,
O' how i wish we were something more.
chrishambolic May 2021
I am a poet
and i don't cry.
Shallow thoughts won't impress me;
I won't deny.
I am the wind that blows in a deserted land.
Incomprehensible--hardly anyone could understand.
I am a poet
and i bleed on paper
I am a poet,
and a poet writes forever.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I failed my calculus earlier--
but it just made me feel more of a soldier.
The more i fail,
the more the fire in me grew.
to let out a curse in the air and said
"I wish i review"
chrishambolic Dec 2020
Believe it or not--
but i have already seen paradise,
it was at the moment i looked in your eyes.
Serene yet perplexing,
a vision i am not expecting.

The kind of perfection no one would want to mess,
assertive and hard to impress.
The more i stare; the more the fire in me grew.
I have never seen such alluring view.

As the silence filled the room--
from a distance a sweet-smelling perfume--
i could smell, and a laugh as soft as the breeze.
Too soft that it weakened my knees.

But dear paradise left me hanging,
alone in a bustling room, standing.
As dear paradise walked pass through me,
like i didn't existed;
like i am nobody.
chrishambolic May 2021
I like things that keeps me guessing.
Things that are beyond my comprehension.
Things i cannot understand at first glance--
and things that would drag me down to a bottomless pit just to quench the thirst.
I like you because...
I found these things in you.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
The lights are out for almost an hour now,
sitting on the edge of my bed,
still thinking of you somehow.
Staring blankly on my window with the reflection of the moon;
hoping to forget you, not now, but maybe soon.

The sound of my heavy breathing is the only thing i could hear.
Ignoring the mosquitos bites and their buzz's on my ear.
Right here, right now it's only you i think about,
inside this dark room, no more hiding and no more doubt.

The cool breeze entered from my window this time,
i closed my eyes as it gives me shiver through my spine.
A liquid substance fell through my cheeks down to my chin.
A realization hit me, now i know what a fool I've been.

I told myself many times before to not cry for you again,
but how am i going to end this? still wondering when.
The moon that reflects through my window seems like staring at me;
saying "everything will be fine, set your heart free".

Maybe i was just too dumb to not realize things,
all the pain, the tears, those sleepless nights and the heartache he brings.
Maybe i was just blinded by his captivating words.
I let him ruin my heart and everyday it hurts.

Tonight as i looked at the moonlit with tears on my cheeks,
i promise to forget him, but why does it makes me weak?
As the stars looked at me in return, the moon started to dim.
Woke up in the middle of the night,
now everything was just a dream.
hello?
chrishambolic Jun 2021
A beautiful adventure
yet a perilous one.
Some days are joyful
some nights are despairing.
It's a bittersweet,
unpredictable quest.
So in silence i write--
In silence i rhyme.
Here's to thee;
Life in poetry.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
Melting and smoky--
like a candle at night,
shining like a sunlight.
Every drop that fell
hurts so bad like a farewell.
But just like a candle at night,
you give hope and dreams
blocking all my internal screams.
'Cause you are my candle at night,
that keeps me cozy and less affright.
I cannot tell how long will you last,
but don't leave me scared and aghast.

Few minutes later here you are,
no longer sparkling; no longer a star.
O what a pain in the eye
as in your light i rely.
Like a candle at night gone in a snap,
maybe I'll end this evening with a nap.
a month ago i lost a friend and i didn't even got the chance to see him for the last time due to this pandemic. I was really devastated but i know that he's now in the better place. This poem is for him.
chrishambolic Apr 2021
Mama, i killed someone--
I cut her throat and drowned her to death.
She stabbed me several times and so i choked her.
Mama, im afraid;
will they know i am the murderer?
I buried her body somewhere not far.
Now dead men tell no tales.
Mama, i killed someone--
I killed her in my poem.
chrishambolic Apr 2021
Marry a poet--
she'll tell you the universe in a sonnet.
She expresses her affection in a poem,
for endlessly, to a bard;
you are an anthem.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I love and i let you go;
for i can feel the distance between us.
Your eyes were no longer in love,
it was as if they were absent of life.

I love you and i let you go,
because in the first place
i remembered you were never mine
and i was never your muse.

For the last time, i love you--
and this time,
I'll let you go.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I can still recall your laugh,
your eyes,
your smiles.
Everything about you.
I miss our late night talks,
how you made me feel so special.

You gave me the best memories
And now you're a memory.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
I longed for your lasting embrace;
O how warm and cozy it is.
The dreary night became so lucent,
as you pressed your hand on my cheek.

May this night last a lifetime.
Eye to eye;
just you and i.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
you hid under your blanket
so no one could hear--
how you cried for your life
like the end is near.
may the dying soul in you stays still.
sooner or later i know you'll heal.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
You once showed me the beauty of love;
what it feels like when someone stares at you like you're the only person around.
When someone holds your hand like they're afraid of losing you,
and the unexplainable sensation whenever you're near.

But you also showed me what it feels like to be left alone.
To wait for nothing and cry for nothing.
Now i know the feeling of it all.
Too bad i loved a selfish soul.
chrishambolic Dec 2020
You once promised me eternity,
but you left me astray in the middle of nowhere.
Now you're gone with the wind.
They say all good things must end,
but somewhere down this road;
I'll still be waiting for you.

Waiting for you to return,
even if it takes forever.
chrishambolic Apr 2021
Don't cry for me.
Forever your memory is my companion.
My image will soon be vanished through years;
but don't agonize--
for i am still here.
chrishambolic Aug 2021
I hate to remember you
in every songs that i play.
In every movies I've watched
or even in every poems that i wrote.
I hate to remember you
but every time i do, i feel so alive.
I hate remembering you
but my heart knows
it's still beating for you.
chrishambolic Jan 2021
If i just have the courage
then i wouldn't waste any ink,
To tell the world im in blue
in a blink.
If only i can speak and shout---
then mortals will know
im in pain with no doubt.
chrishambolic Mar 2022
And how strange it feels
To be caught by someone I've never met.
I yearned for love,
And you gave it to me for a little while.
I could listen to you all day.
Your laughter drives me to another world.
Late at night,
When everything else is dark,
Your voice is my light.
Every time you whisper my name softly,
Inside of me,
A garden with butterflies unfolds.
If this is love,
Then I'll have this for the rest of my life.

— The End —