Sometimes I get a sick joy out of knowing
that it was over for me the day we parted
but the only thing keeping you alive
is hating me
I realize how this sounds,
a relationship ended with someone and now there is a new relationship and the only thing that seems to be fueling the new relationship is harassing a member of the old relationship.
I've never been able to draw
a paintbrush does not belong in my hand
I've never been able to dance
the beat of a song doesn't flow through my bones
I've never been good at math
numbers simply look like rebellious letters
But I can write
I can paint you a picture with my words
make you feel something more than a beat deep in your bones
and make you believe in the only math that matters
you + me
love is my three AM phone call, that you don't send to voice mail
love is when I remind you to bring an umbrella
...it's also bringing you chicken soup instead of saying I told you so
love is texting me six times a day to remind me to eat something because you know I'll 'forget'
love is waking up beside you on a Sunday morning and hearing your rough voice mumble in my ear "good morning beautiful"
love is not laughing at me when there's tears rolling down my cheeks while standing on the porch
love is kissing my forehead and whispering *"don't worry, I'll be home soon."
There's so many words that I'm dying to say
things I had held back,
the things I hid away
but twenty six letters will never be enough
to communicate how this feels
Bringing people into your life is a big responsibility
like owning a pet
you have to feed their minds
you have to exercise their limits
you have to show them affection
you have to make time for them
you have to care for them
because sometimes they can't care for themselves
Through the trees
Up the hill
Into unknown land
Increasing the distance
Between you and I
Was something I used to dread
To drown on land
To fight or flight
Doesn't seem worth it to me.
I remember the day we started talking
your gold hair kept falling into your eyes
and I kept fighting the desire to push it away
so it wouldn't hide the beauty you had been blessed with.
You always smelled like a garden,
but not like you had been planting it, more like you grew there
Just sprouted from the ground one day and walked off into my life.
I fell in love,
you laughed at me,
until you fell too.