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2.5k · Apr 7
Shut up (and go)
Adrian Apr 7
Keep quiet,
Silence is your friend
And so am I.

Don’t listen to them,
They’re trying to stop you.
You’ll see this through.
That’s the one thing I’m sure you’ll do.

So shut up
And drive.
Only when far away,
Will you begin to thrive.
697 · Apr 2020
Numerical
Adrian Apr 2020
How many blades
Do I need
To sever these connections?

Or are they just too strong
To accept severance
By mortal blades?
What kind of connection might I be talking of? People, emotions, life, or etc?? And how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?? The world may never know.
681 · May 2020
Friday, March 90th
Adrian May 2020
The leaves May be a May green,
And spring May almost be out,
But to me it is still March,
And April May never come.

May-be it will be March
Until I get back in August.
May-be March won’t ever end.
;) so that means in all of March I’ve been rejected 3 times, one of which I probably shouldn’t count.

Also I just realized that I have 72 followers. Thank you, you amazing 72 people! (I thought I still had 49)
646 · Feb 2020
Qs
Adrian Feb 2020
Qs
If I posted a poem
Containing my feelings,
Would she see it?
Or would it be lost,
Like many other things,
In the silky sands of time?
I mean it’s not like she uses the sight,
Right?
I hope she doesn’t see all of this. Embarrassing stuff...
644 · Jan 2020
Someone
Adrian Jan 2020
All of you precious people,
all you precious men and women:
do not fret or fear,
you are never alone.
Just as I am here,
someone is there.
Someone exists
to repair your breaking soul,
and help you rebuild yourself whole.

No matter who you are,
someone out there loves you.
You may not think this true,
so then keep living
and prove me wrong.
You'll realize I'm right before long.
For all those people who really need it. I wrote this with two people in mind. One of them is you, M. You know who you are. If you read this, please don't do anything rash.
617 · May 2020
Lateral
Adrian May 2020
Beyond this ashen landscape,
And the sifting smoke,
Lie melodic rivers,
Glimmering;
in their chilled iridescence.

Blossoming orange clouds
In the morning’s shining sun,
The softly stagnant lake
Sleeps, a dormant source
For the singing streams.
Maybe the charred forest seems long, but such a landscape is not endless.
577 · Jun 2020
Sightline
Adrian Jun 2020
What lies in the eyes
That stand just out of sight?

The void is endless,
But who can see that far?

If one is set to leave,
Why bother looking back?

Just because you’re out of sight
Doesn’t mean you’ve left my mind too.
509 · Feb 2020
Over The Precipice
Adrian Feb 2020
Sometimes I wonder
If I’ve gone too far.
Stepped out of my place,
Reached up that extra inch,
Or ran that extra mile.

Sometimes I have,
But usually,
It just becomes a wonderful conversation starter.
I always wonder this for two firsts with a friend:
When I first swear,
And when I first make a ****** remark or joke.
(Dark humor is usually acceptable for ppl my age if the previous is ok)
496 · Dec 2019
3. Again! Again!
Adrian Dec 2019
You know I love this, you do as well
We all love the feeling of the dripping blood
I know this feeling brings us closer to hell,
But I cannot live through this emotion flood
I need it to stay alive and sane.
The feeling is good too, it’s bliss
I love all the self inflicted pain
I want more, everyday, without miss.
You may think I’m out of line, I’m crazy
But i know you love it too
You are a *****, you’re lazy
I deal with that **** everyday, and so do you.
We need our emotion vents to let out the crud.
Why not again use our own blood
so I’ve figured it out. The even numbered poems are me, while the odd numbered poems are... also me. But the odd numbered ones are by the ****** up me, the one that wants me to die and hurt myself.
464 · Jan 2020
Clamor & Commotion
Adrian Jan 2020
All the voices
Running through
My mind, mistaken.
My thoughts feel taken.
They can’t be my own,
But yet here I lie
Writing yet another one
Trying to wind back up,
Rather than come undone.
Written on the bus while listening to metal music, kinda ironic, right? Jan.9.2020
447 · Dec 2019
Alight
Adrian Dec 2019
Set me on fire;
Put a match to my clothes
Watch me rise in a pillar of flame,
Listen to my livid screams of pain.
Feel my existence slowly fade
As my body finishes fueling the glow,
As my screams mellow into the silent cracks.

In time, the fire will turn to embering ash.
I will have been consumed by a long gone inferno.
And when I have been burned to the ground,
I know that the only place I can go is up.
Im not sure why I write so much about fire. I mean I don’t think it describes me or anything.
437 · Dec 2019
Forward
Adrian Dec 2019
For each step I take,
I’ll have one more step to give.
So I’ll move onwards
Someone’s probably made this connection into a poem already, but think of this in terms of life and what comes with age.
424 · Mar 1
Untitled
Adrian Mar 1
As the gloomish clouds
Silently weep,
The world darkens
And we fall towards sleep.
417 · May 2020
Windswept
Adrian May 2020
Light clouds
softly dance
along this azure sky.

The wind
lies unseen,
unheard,
and unfelt
along these vernal days.

As much as I freeze
in her gusty presence,
I can't help
but miss the company.
Yep. Back with another weird wind love story thing. I honestly don't know why I chose the wind as a symbol for love but whatever. In actuality, it has been quite breezy where I live. (I'm by the ocean so what else should I expect?)
405 · Mar 6
Adrift
Adrian Mar 6
Digging
Into the ground,
Pulling up dirt.

It splashes like water
On a brilliant summer day,
We all love to play in water...

Bury me
Under this weight,
Bury me
Under my sin.
Bury me,
for I will never win.
Inspired by “Dig” from Mudvayne
393 · Jan 2020
reflections
Adrian Jan 2020
The moon reflects
the sun's simmering shine
onto our planet's nightly shade,
just as the sun
reflects her circulating radiance
onto my darkening world.
Written in math class again. It's been a wild week for me with workload so that's why I haven't been posting as much. I haven't had time to do what I love, which *****, but school is important.
386 · Jan 2020
An Assumed Statistic
Adrian Jan 2020
Everyone has watched ****,
It’s like peeing in the shower;
Everyone has done it,
Yet it’s too wildly embarrassing
For anyone to admit it.
I hope it’s not just me for either one of those...
And I hope that I don’t sully the innocence of any younger people.
380 · Mar 2020
On The Hill
Adrian Mar 2020
Sparks fly
Ashes fall
Coals simmer
A crumbling wall.

Torches flicker
Down a lamplit hall.
The fuel dies down,
And a new man stands above all.
Covid-19 is a cool shortening (COronaVIrus Disease 2019)
371 · Aug 2020
Awake
Adrian Aug 2020
Maybe it’s time
That I wake up;
Throw caution
To the wind
for once in my life.

A fleeting flame
Only needs a log
To relight it’s inferno.
355 · Oct 2020
Untitled
Adrian Oct 2020
The fragrance of loneliness
Dwindles under our starred sky.
Only the blind will ever see
A starless expanse.
The blind are faulty to the point where it’s luck.

No I’m not talking about people who are actually blind.
351 · Dec 2019
An Oddity
Adrian Dec 2019
I love you,
Truly, I do.

From the bottom of my heart,
You shake warmth into my core.
But not from the base of my ****,
My mind dares not open that door.

I could never defile you in my head,
It sickens me to even think of it.
In all my honesty:
My heart will forever love you more
Than my ****. To me, my genitalia’s a bore.
After writing this it made me reflect on how someone said I’m innocent in a way.
347 · Mar 2020
Zero
Adrian Mar 2020
At the value of nothing,
Zero is a dead cold end,
Or the mark of new beginnings.

It all depends
On the arithmetic
That you choose
To use.
I mean, it’s true!
346 · Mar 2020
The Flowers In Bloom
Adrian Mar 2020
A soul caught in the past,
A planet covered in cables
Was never meant to last.

Fly the flags half mast,
And wait for it to pass.
Love flies up in a flume,
But why will these flowers
Never bloom?
I can only wonder... and regret.
345 · Jan 2020
Shining West
Adrian Jan 2020
Stepping out
Of the shadowed veil,
And Pulling off
The masquerade mask,
The sun beckons dawn forth.
Thought of while washing my hands. Odd time to think of poetry. Jan.10.2020
341 · Jun 2020
Lingering
Adrian Jun 2020
Venomous voices
Tempting fate.

Listless lisping
And culling words.

Silence prevails,
Pervading my guilt...

And feeding my
Venomized thoughts.
The things I say sometimes...
338 · Dec 2019
7. Don’t leave...
Adrian Dec 2019
Why did I need to leave
It was so much fun dragging the knife through
1 for every time I shakily breathe
On a wave of pain, we flew.
I have always loved that other side
It breaks me that I left
He just wants to hide
Leave me to carry it, to heft.
I have no words for my treacherous acts
I hate me down to every last shred
I want to rip them apart with... possibly an axe?
He means nothing to me, i will turn him red
If it’s the last thing i will ever do alive
I will **** him, or at least stop his thrive.
Said more as an aside than directly at me, but since it’s myself I kinda knew what was going on... also from my random *** suicide thoughts that came during thus time.
313 · Dec 2019
Untitled for a reason
Adrian Dec 2019
cannot publicly acknowledge the existence of angels,
Such an outrageous act has been outlawed by the council.
So here I am to tell you about these nonexistent beings.
They come from a place called heaven, a serene place
Lying in the clouds that do not fade; they are everlasting.
In heaven they soar free, using their feathery wings,
Which glisten like scheelite in the eternally dawning sun.
Their halos are a gold, 10 carats more pure than the element,
And seemingly glow, even in the most minimal light.

And their souls, as pure as a diatomic gas,
As white as the everlasting magnesium flame.
But most importantly, their souls glow like the firey sun,
Always ready to make us happy, and eternal in existence.

But I once again forget, as a note is passed my way,
That “angels,” in fact, “do not actually exist”
Signed,
The council.
It also says to stop talking about these forms,
Or I will be detained... then executed...
Welp, that’s a sour note to leave on...
Bye.
If anyone has listened to the podcast Welcome to Night Vale, you’ll know where my inspiration for the denial of said winged creatures. If not, listen to it, it’s a funny sci-fi comedy podcast. Also again, look up any names that you don’t know, chemistry is pretty cool too.
301 · Jan 2020
Cigarette
Adrian Jan 2020
I lay there in the field,
An unlit Marlboro in between my lips.
Gazing into the summer sky...

My breathing starts matching the lengthening shadows,
My pulse slows down to even out with the intermittent owl hoots,
The cicadas fade into the crickets, and the crickets play a lulab-

A sudden warmth hits my face,
The light of my lighter is shining back into my eyes.
Once the end is in embers, the lighter is pulled away.
I take a long drag and gaze into nothingness,
Once again wondering who lights my cigarette,
Because they always steal my lighter too.
Took a change in my style when writing this over the summer. I don’t actually smoke, just a bit of my imagination at play.
July.2019
281 · Apr 2020
Roof
Adrian Apr 2020
The morning dawn
Begins to light a darkened sky,
Painting colors onto the black.
Like a how printing press makes stories,
The sky paints it’s morning glories.
A child watches this transformation
As it whisks away his trepidation.
A warm sunny light
Shines through these
Once gnarled trees,
And the child finds it
A fine replacement
To the icy blue moonlight
That pervaded the night.
Standing up after a long night,
The boy gingerly steps off the roof
And through his ajar window.
Within seconds of touching his bed,
He’s entrapped, from toe to head.
Slumber takes its firm hold
As punishment for the stunt he pulled.
If I had a window that could let me get to my roof, I’d be up there a lot. I think we’ve all had a fear of the dark’s unknowns.

I’ve never been great at narrative writing, but I thought I’d try my hand at it once more.
277 · Feb 7
Churning
Adrian Feb 7
Within the midst of your lies,
Hiding among the corner
Of your drifting eyes.

I stand surprised,
Activated by what’s lost
Awoken by the cost.

These cold blooded veins
Warming to your pains
Attempting to hide your fear
Of doing man right.

Internalization taking flight.
I still am up and weird about what I did. it’s nothing bad. I gave someone a gift and it made them “disgustingly thankful” in their words. but still I’m in turmoil. Was it right for me to do that, from a personal standpoint? From an impersonal standpoint (not considering me) it was a nice thing to do. I do remember their reaction and smile because it made me happy, but why?
277 · Mar 2020
Sunlight
Adrian Mar 2020
Following a radiant gaze,
And bringing light to the second phase.

Tracing the path of the scorching light,
Yet drooping it’s head in the mild night.

Clouds shall darken the sun dried sky,
But the trooper keeps it’s head held high

In the tempest of winds screeching loud,
The sunflower still stands, tall and proud.
I’m not dead (well obviously), I’ve just been stuck at home and not seeing much new or doing anything wild, so my words are lacking their “power.”
274 · Nov 2020
Autumnal Waters
Adrian Nov 2020
Green to amber,
And amber to brown;
Reflective blue
To a tumultuous gray.
Glimmering dew
Now a shining frost.

The sun,
Once beaming overhead
Now longingly gazes sideways,
Bestowing a more gentle light
Over the delicate landscape.

The marsh is ever changing,
But I feel the same.
I’ve been here for a year... it went by so quick. I’m amazed. I’ve written over 500 poems and used 11 thousand words. But I have a question: does the word count count how many different words I’ve used, or how many words are in all my poetry? It could go either way with me, so I really don’t know.
269 · Feb 2020
Involvement
Adrian Feb 2020
Stop.
Right.
There.
If I’m getting involved,
Give me a reason to care.

I can help with matters
Pertaining to your mind,
But I am not so kind
All of the time.
I’m not the nicest man alive, but I assure you that it’s unintentional. Sensitivity isn’t my forté (I think that’s the accent placement).
268 · Jan 13
Untitled
Adrian Jan 13
As the sunrise’s claymore
Is the blazing creator
Of our earthly existence,

The moonlight’s spear
Is the slice right through the vein,
Revealing what we try hide.
259 · Dec 2020
Scraps
Adrian Dec 2020
The years won’t testify
The light I’ve lit.
Standing off the edge
And rusting into oblivion,
I stand, united in my scream;
It’s the only way I am whole
I wrote this when? A week or so ago? ***? These emotion thingys are weird.
257 · Mar 22
And The Flames
Adrian Mar 22
Burn brighter than steel,
And stronger than a star.
You’ve stoked the flame,
Now take the reigns.

Subdued no longer,
Your ambition grows stronger.
You’re the unyielding flame,
Burn the fields away,
Nothing shall stay.

The match was lit,
The air became flame.
There’s only ashes left
And I’m to blame.
253 · Dec 2019
Camel Notation
Adrian Dec 2019
My life is in shambles.
As destitute as that essay...
For English. This sounds wrong...
3 things:
1, camel notation is a way to name variables in computer coding
2, look closely at the haiku, i messed something up on purpose.
3, I may fancy myself as a poet (idk if i can call myself one) but ******* i am horrible at writing essays.
251 · Jan 10
Untitled
Adrian Jan 10
The permeation of my shadow
Beckons a new dawn
Upon the moonlight
Which shrouds my soul.

But it’s only in the day,
That I can clearly see
The dripping carnage,
Which was once me.
250 · Feb 2020
Fallen Apart
Adrian Feb 2020
I just want to cry,
I want to spit my tears upon my pillow,
and cry in my silence for the remainder
of my raven eve.

Why can't I cry?
Where is the salty mix
running down my cheeks?
Why do I feel the tears well up
even though they don't release?

My mask is broken.
the fissure ran its course,
and split my face right open.
Usually I'd be mad or frustrated in times like these, but this time I want to cry (well duh).
249 · Mar 2020
Enjoyment
Adrian Mar 2020
Why
Do
I
Enjoy
Yuri
Manga
So
Much
These
Days
If you know, you know. If you don’t, ignore this.

**** manga is good too.
249 · Jan 2
Edgeless, Nameless
Adrian Jan 2
Silence;
Turning to dust in the gentle breeze.
Anger subsides
And the turquoise sea drags us down.

Through our ethereal existence,
We listen.
Through our heart’s mind,
We feel.

All we hear is the wind,
And all we feel...

All we feel is our silent suffocation.
I needed to write so I wrote.
249 · Jan 2020
A Coward’s Desire
Adrian Jan 2020
A note lies on a wooden desk,
Its words conveying a coward’s half baked decision.

It was once clean and blank
But this changed, as all things do.
First was ink, forming a needlessly long message.
With this, came the tears, dripping at random.
The upset scrawling accidentally rips the note...
A pen thrown down, blotting the paper and words.
And lastly, more ink, but it’s from a different well.
Aug.7.2019. I remember writing this with two possibilities at mind, either a breakup note, or a suicide note. I feel bad for the paper...
248 · Jan 12
Me, Myself, & I
Adrian Jan 12
Drawing out the vile ichor
Which flows through my veins.
Cleaving out what’s left in me,
And leaving it to dry.

As you’ve taken out my sun,
Only moonlight remains.
And with the rising night,
I enjoy glistening pains.
248 · Jun 2020
Paper Madness
Adrian Jun 2020
As ink is left to fall,
Another paper
Is left to stain.

As my veins
Decide the path
Of my blood,
The ink in my pen
Decides the stain
Upon this paper.
Sometimes the stains
Are legible words.
Sometimes the stains
Are my blood.
248 · Jun 2020
Father
Adrian Jun 2020
He is an *******,
But a good kind of *******.
It runs in my fam.
I abbreviated family to fam to fit the 5-7-5
245 · Nov 2019
Giving my thanks.
Adrian Nov 2019
I give thanks to all around me.
Animate or not, it all served a purpose
A purpose that allowed me to rise
To who I am now.

I rose out of depression,
Out of a need for death,
Out of a cycle of seething hatred

Into forgiveness.

Into love.

Into life.
Thanksgiving, might as well give thanks! So thanks for reading!
244 · Dec 2019
Anime
Adrian Dec 2019
Don’t say you hate it
Without having tried it first.
Hell, you might like it.
I doubt there are many other  people in the poetry community who watch anime... maybe in japan though... nah.
243 · Jan 2020
Sheltering
Adrian Jan 2020
I know I’m Li’l late,
My love’s just a dying shield
That shelters my hate.
Input a but after ‘late’ and before ‘my’. Just my passing thought I had as the bags under my eyes grew... saggier i guess...
242 · Jun 2020
Between life
Adrian Jun 2020
Life flows on
Even if we are stagnant.
Through all it will travel,
Harboring our emotions
And our experiences.

Nothing lasts forever,
But anything good
Is worth trying to keep close.
I’m sorry.
238 · Feb 2020
Burning Away
Adrian Feb 2020
Incineration of the mind,
Quenching the white coals
Of the overheated fuel.

Gazing into this furnace,
Which radiates more
Than the distant sun.

Inflammation on touch,
Festering blisters crowd
My already damaged hand.

Before contact is made,
The hand will reel away.
Only the foolish dive in,
Because the water
Is not fine.
The different ways in which you can express the one you love as an untouchable rose. The ”this” in the first line of the second stanza refers to the furnace as close by, unlike the sun.
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