I was your Hazel Grace
Because I thought I was a grenade

I was in my final year in high school when I started liking you
And soon I would leave the same school we were into

I, and the people around us
We became dependent of your actions
And you made us believe that you liked me, too

So much depends upon this boy I really liked
behind his eye glasses were his eyes that had
always been sending me love letters
that I always wanted to reciprocate
his stunning smile made him look grand every time

So much depends upon this rebel heart
that I was ironically obedient to
Because not granting what this heart wanted
would **** me a hundred times

Until the day came that I needed to leave you
I thought leaving would hurt harder than a heart break
But you were the one who left
And that was when I started believing
that I was not the grenade I once thought I would be
but it was you

*You left me wounded

“Nothing up there tonight but entropy, and the same imaginary shapes that people had been imposing on nature since they’d first thought to wonder at the heavens.”
― Peter Watts, Echopraxia

I'm at that moment in the sleepover
Where I have a headache
From too many sweets and out of tune singing
We are both curled up on the bed under a blanket
Festooned with kernels of makeshift popcorn
The iPad is full of ridiculous videos
And the desk full of dreams on sheets
Of pure dove white paper
Except now it's covered
With glue sharpies and cutouts
But never mind
I couldn't care less now
Because I'm worrying about the money
All spent on food and clothes
Clothes that make you look like you had less food
Than you actually did
I know you're going to snore so bad
But right now I'm writing and laughing
At cheesy videos and hilarious quotes
I wish we could stay together always

The grass is tickling
My hair
And the breeze is lifting
My toes
As they scrunch up under
The sun
And my nose inhales the smell
Of summer
While the whistling continues from
The trees
And the cooing echoed from
The birds
But there is still an underlying hint of buzzing from
The bees

Clockwise against the blue light
Silhouette against a 70 mile speed limit
"I let the music take over my soul, body, and mind."
It looks like an ant with wings
Hitchiking it's final ride
Counter Clockwise against the blue light
It takes off and lands again
The wheel shakes as my unbalanced tires reach 75
I turn the volume **** two notches up
Clockwise against the blue light
"The stress burns my brain,
like acid raindrops."

~~
I am not writing any poetry
Not a huff,
Not even a romantic mood,
I talked to a distress

Unto thee of say my friend:

The suffering of pain is more than a pain
Words of distress
No longer I can't say either

The story of that night
That is longer than a long night
That night, my love had died before the dawn

How do I tell thee

The suffering of love is unforgettable
Than the love you never achieved  
Middle of the night to about chest pain

When I could not bear it no longer
Then at late night I call a friend to awake
No longer I can't say either

My friend
O' my friend!
My dearest friend!

How do I tell thee
My soul grew dry that is more than a wither petals
No longer I can't say either

When the sudden stopped of time
I stood, Saw the closed distant door
No longer I can't say either

To be alone in everybody
Within a moment a known seems to be unknown
No longer I can't say either

The last thing to understand who she is constant
The story of the lost bright Star
No longer I can't say either

The door is closed
Maybe someone has locked
Alone, The sleepless nights of choking

One's that hard
Many pale faces in the crowd of strangers
Love is lost within too many hopes

How do I tell thee
No longer I can't say either
~~
@ Musfiq us shaleheen