You were my unexplained
My unexpected
Overtook my life; helped me feel again

I didn't know who you were
This beast, this beauty
But out of nothing came you

My dream without dreaming
The only one that can calm my mind
Rescued my soul, this you did
Relieved me from myself

I fell, entrusted, alive
And exhausted now I try to clear my eyes of saline
My lungs of sad air

For I can't let go
Not now
Not ever

You are my only fish in the sea
And no one will ever love anything as much as this girl loves her fish

It seems that you've opened up my chest.
Cracked my ribs and placed a bullet in my heart.
ONE bullet in ONE valve between my atrium and ventricle.
To stop my life force.
My muscles long for the sweet oxygen delivery.
But to their dismay, it will never come.
My body can no longer function.
My body can no longer breathe.
And I love you for doing so.
You are nothing short of my kryptonite.
The force that drives me mad.
With this innate pull toward you.
I give to you... Myself.
I surrender my will; I bow to you.
Obeying your every desire.
I only want for you to be pleased with me.

I'd take a bullet for you.
Pierce my skin; tear my flesh.
The next time you see me
I'll love you even more.
You knew me before I was me.

When I met you.
You became my inspiration.
Immediately creating a drive within me.
This drive compelling me to move.

And I'd take a bullet for you.
Pierce my skin; tear my flesh.
The next time you see me
I'll love you even more.
You knew me before I was me.

     Bringing me to my knees.
     Forcing me to see my complicated mess.
     Bringing me to my feet.
     Hands in the air reaching for the light.

Your beauty and humility would grace my presence.
Me, a grateful girl, allowed to form a bond with you.
Sweetheart, you were my spark to save my life.
You saved me.
My sister, my best friend.

That's why I'd take a bullet for you.
Pierce my skin; tear my flesh.
The next time you see me
     The next time
I will embrace you, my dear friend.

     Bringing me to my knees.
     Forcing me to see my complicated mess.
     Bringing me to my feet.
     Hands in the air reaching for the light.

I want proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
Because throughout my dreams
You've come into reality
I made you up
My image
My everything
All that you are
Is all that I've wanted
And
I want proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
When you look in the mirror what do you see
Who stares back at you
What glares back at you
Do you SEE me
If you sense me, then you know my despondency
You carry my burden
I've awoken and acknowledged who I am
What I am
Please give me proof
Proof that you're real
Proof that you exist
Because
When I look in the mirror
I see me

As I lay dying from across the room, bleeding from across my heart.
I said I swear, I hope to die.
Didn't know you'd consummate my request.
With strained, staring eyes and with my last will I reach to you.
Back demolished, lungs collapsed, brow furrowed, hand imbrue with my A positive evolutionary force.
Drip.
And drip.
Hand, now algid, now violaceous.
Can't. Engage. Muscle memory. Rigidity.
My limbs are limp, my last sacrifice for you.
I never told you that I can see your soul, your aura.
In this very second, as I lay fixated on your glaring portals, your broken windows, I am the one who procures this victory.
Because even though my mortal being is becoming nullified at the expense of your hand...
It was me who broke your heart.
It was my touch that pirated your soul and you will die.
Your energy will never be able to speak another's name again.

Going through the motions of life without the ability to feel.
I will not allow myself to be altruistic, to have love.
I am mechanical.
I am a fine tuned machine.
Made in your image.
Going through the motions of life.
Watch me be perfect.
Your definition of real.
I'm cold.  I'm gone.
Save me from loneliness.
Save me from the hyperborean dungeon of my mind.
Save. Me.
My heart has turned to pistons and steel.
Bloodless and without flexibility.
Pumping anguish and self-hate with every inspiration I take through my veins, my newly welded pipes.
Lacerate myself to see if I still bleed.
It feels better than the truth.

And I love you
I've loved you for so long
I've loved you all along
You were my savior to this dead heart
And I was your only girl

I didn't put all this work in so that the next one can enjoy you
I AM the next one
I'll reap my own harvest

No matter what you've said
No matter what you've done
I never caved
But we still came undone
Never meant to be forever

But I couldn't stop it
And I couldn't help it
Standing in my past now
It all happened; now it's done
Now it happened; we're no longer one

If you can't see me
Who I am
Then you must go
And I must let you