I smoke **** because it makes the headaches go away My brain pounds against my skull And the lights flicker and The sharp pain follows me home The drugs made everything dull I mean, can you blame me? A life full of sharp Stabbing Pain Washed away with an inhalation of smoke The tramadol didn’t work The codeine didn’t work But the smoke
You used to use it against me You used to say “You’ve changed” “You aren’t the same person I fell in love with” The pain The blame Of changing with your growing age You used to smirk After you flirted After you insulted After you won I used to imagine what it would be like to kiss your thin pink lips I thought I could predict the way you would kiss The way the knives prickled off your tongue Sharp I am surprised they are not Red with blood You used to do a lot of things You used to play god But you kept forgetting your own rules I Was scared of your inconsistency I was scared of how much it took to get you to love me I Was always scared of something And that something changes constantly
I Used to Be scared of you
I used to send you messages littered with “I’m sorry” And “I love you”
We
Used to do a lot of things
But we don’t anymore
All the memories All the ticks Melted With our friendship
It’s dark here And the fire sizzles And the heat hurts So hold my ******* hand As my head pounds And the sobs escape And the night takes another life Hold my ******* hand As I feel her grow farther apart from me Constantly I held your ******* hand Through your parents fighting And the nights spent crying And your loved one almost dying Even though I was tired Even though I was hurting That’s what we do We hold each other’s ******* hands