Where do you stand.                Now
       Alone in the sun
       Miserable earbuds
       and backwards youme
                                       Forever
       this moment in the loneliest place in my life
       suburban parking lot, USA
       Covering secret hope with blankets of anonymity

       Money just cools them
                   Freeze each other LIKEICECRYSTALS
                   can't even be together
Never.       Even when it can't get worse
                   in the sillyfuck of summertime sticky countertop of hangover

Seasons without the hot seatbelt of safety
                   and the inoutness of us
                   not careful always
Sick bruised overdue goodbye
                   life sentence
Stealing it back with the work of no worries

Just hoping art still means something
just ******* praying it's not empty
                   like your neverpromises
                   and your didntlies

Cowering with broken heart fever
Burying strangers shrugs in coffeehouse choketears
Who-gives-a-**** cliche misery

I hope your own shadow haunts your periphery
                   Like narcissus' fear of drowning

Sometimes the goodbyes are should have
A whole year of goodbyes
All I wish for is the end

Trembling consciousness
Bewildered by the separation between
Within and without

Troubled yearning settling
Just beneath my skin

Cold morning water lip
Straight-------- swallow---- bury me
Bury
Secret, knowing, secret
How clean can she be?
Break me simply
Break me soon
Find me out
Oh, it’s here
No fool, she can’t change it
I cannot, I will not
Go crazy
With love
For you

The one thing you want, the one thing I crave incessantly
Will never happen
So what the **** are we doing here?
Braiding each other’s lost subtleties into something no one wants to see
But us

Free
Fast
Falling
*****

His eyes grew dark and distant
absolutely nothing wrong
He smiled without his eyes
how are you feeling?
nothing, numb, bored

Bracing each other, pushing
                                             out

Fearing the flatline, we find
one another, in the dark

Rubbing the blood back into his palms
he buries his breath in my clean hair
Counting down the seconds, we remember

Leaving the cold room, he asks
is it over now?

Startled by my reflection
In the open window
Living room straight back
through the kitchen

Blue snowlight
Stares through me

Seeing out all day long, forgetting

The night drops black curtains quiet
when no one's looking, instead
Of out

I see in
Brave and solitary
The one waits true
Bright unsecret
Blood rushing real
Whispering cure

He can see pain and touch it
away
with golden sincerity

quiet hope nestled
pushing out from crowded corners
secret wanderlust