There's a sadness
and I always know when she's coming.
She's on the door, asking for some space
"I don't need a lot, just a little bit", she whispers.
No answers.
She starts to scream.

I'm always caught up trying to decide if I let her in or throw her out. She always catches me at this very point, when it's usually too late: I'm back in the grave.

It's a ocean of feelings, of nostalgics old times, of who I was, who I want to be and who I'm becoming. It's slowly making me float at the same station: Me.

She caught me. I'm hers.
I'm trying to be healthy and happy and wish happiness for everyone... But this bravery, my dear... How could I?

It turns out that, night falls like this I  don't seem to have the strength to fight it. There's just sadness. She caught me. I'm hers again.

Missing you is like being in the open sea
and these days I get to think I'll die
because it comes in waves and sometimes
They're so bigger than myself
Pushing me deep, one side to another

Somedays it's like a whale's mouth
Her teeths cutting through my bones
Eating me alive
And I can't get out

Other days it's the boat
Like it came to save me
Missing you shows that what we had was worth it
And I don't feel so bad
because at least I've tried

Unlike you,
Who gave up in the first sight of water
Oh God, no
Please don't leave me in the open sea...
I hear my voice begging.

The waves all over again.

I ain't no candle in the wind

I'm the board, the lightning, the thunder
Kind of girl who's gonna make you wonder
Who you are and who you've been

They mistook my kindness for weakness
I ****** up, I know that, but Jesus
Can't a girl just do the best she can?

Catch a wave and take in the sweetness
Think about it, the darkness, the deepness
All the things that make me who I am

And who I am is a big-time believer
That people can change, but you don't have to leave her
When everyone's talking, you can make a stand

'Cause even in the dark I feel your resistance
You can see my heart burning in the distance

[...]

I hope you can look at yourself
Beyond your choices
Or at least,
Beyond that choice specifically.
Because that's what I do.

You see, baby
We have this same atoms composition
And exquisite ways of seeing the world
That's alright

Today I was getting ready to go out
And then I couldn't help noticing that
My chest is holding a lot of scrapes

It got me thinking.

If that's all over,
and there's nothing left but ashes

Then why the hell
am I still bleeding
Over your name?

You are an interesting species.
An interesting mix.
You're capable of such beautiful dreams, and such horrible nightmares.
You feel so lost, so cut off, so alone.

In all our searching, the only thing we've found that makes the emptiness bearable is each other.