when we remember how the
universe stretches itself out,
we realize how close we are.
135.8 miles is nothing, really.

how lucky i am for closeness,
moments against your chest,
in your arms and on your lap.
i would cross the sky for you.

Everyone’s caught up in things that don’t matter
I don’t care who can shotgun faster
People are dying, there are lives at stake
There is only so much ******* I can take
Complacency chews us up and spits us out
It’s so hard to figure out what life is all about

Laying on my back under the covers
Staring at the popcorn in the ceiling
The sun is peeking through the blinds
The dust is swirling through the air

Feeling the thumping of the broken fan
Breathing in the stale afternoon
The air is rattling through the vents
The pup is snoring through her dreams

Is the ceiling spinning, or am I?
The sun lady says, “Patience.”

Love, the entire universe is you
Your eyes are in the sun
Your heart is in the moon
Your soul is in the stars
There is no escape from you now
You are everything

Our heat is rising in this room
My mood breaks as the waves
Destruction is inevitable
You should not have done that
My mind and the wind swirl
Faster and faster, no brakes on this ride
You were not prepared
But you caused this **** anyways
I am a natural disaster
Don't pick up the pieces from my storm
There will be too many to count
My broken heart will never be the same

These stiff covers let in so much air
If you wake me up, I won’t care
Waking up to the sun staring back at me
Is the only kind of morning I want to see

Let's buy a bungalow
With a small porch
And a porch swing
To hold hands on
For lazy afternoons

Let's buy a bungalow
With flower boxes
On the small porch
To raise colorful blooms
As our love thrives

Let's buy a bungalow
With a welcome mat
Before the front door
To make new friends
And to walk on each day

Let's buy a bungalow
Let's build a life together

You, shouting into the crevices of my being.  
Your words bouncing against my insides
like the metallic spheres in a pinball machine,
knocking out what was left for me to say
with small dings that echo in my ribcage
and fill my skull with absolutely nothing

Me, thoughtlessly regurgitating your own voice back to you.
Wasted energy, heaving empty thoughts onto your white sneakers
with small parts of me that are now gone forever, leaving me
with the ***** aftertaste of absolutely nothing

Come here, love.
Let's try to make something
Out of our suffering tonight.

We are two
Dead, dry sticks together
That hope for a flame.

The balance beam between
The strange misery of love
And the peace of anger.
I am no gymnast, but
I cover my limbs in chalk
And climb on again and again.
The falls leave bruises
That will never go away,
But I choose to continue.

Last night the cicadas sang
For us and summertime
Your eyes showed me
The truth in my lies
Your tongue is poetry
It leaves poetry in me

When you worried and said,
“Are you still happy with me”
My heart crawled up my throat
How could I make you think
For one moment that I don’t
Want you more than anything else

I’ve been coughing my lungs out
Hoping that you feel the same way
I’m not scared of dying
I’m afraid of being alone
A life with none of you is the
Worst nightmare I can create

She runs into the wind
With the glare of sun
In her bright eyes

Sleep holds me as my eyes
Reflect and absorb the light.
I'm driving, sleeping, eating
blind and deaf and complacent.
I am only here when you are here.

I waste centuries waiting.
Finally, you come to me.

Love, take me with you and we'll
Crackle and burn and smother ourselves
Together till the end. You have kissed
Your princess awake from her slumber
And your fairytale has become your own.

But, what of when the night ends?
Am I only alive when you're breathing into me?

Sometimes
Speaking with you
Is like yelling into an empty cave
All I get back
Are my own words, mumbled

I tried to take all of you in at once
But you just go on and on
Give me a compass, a telescope, a map
So I can I find the rest of you
I will go to the end of the earth
To know every last bit of you
The good, the bad, the ugly
I want it all and I want it forever

Looking ahead and realizing
How little I want to follow
The plan I set for myself
I want to pull over at the next exit
Get out of the car, wander
Feel the wind and the sun and the grass
Take my time
Stop thinking
Stop worrying
Stop stop stop

Where did the questions go?
I have searched everywhere,
On the tip of your tongue,
In the dark parts of your eyes.
No questions, only answers.
Finally, I looked
Inside of your gym shorts.
There, I found it! A care
For me as a human being
But only when my pants
Are on the floor too.

I am the sea foam slamming into your rocks

I didn't understand that
avoiding the truth was lying
until I told you everything
I opened my heart and
you poured yourself into me
Keep going love
Pour, pour, pour

You filled my quiet place with smoke
****** throat and salty tears
The silence isn’t silent anymore
Your laughter and smooth words
Suffocation, persuasion
My fingers forgot how to escape
My voice forgot how to say “no”
My lungs forgot how to breathe
Swallowing fire instead of oxygen
And exhaling regret

How much longer will you stay

You have barely touched my wounds
They are awaiting your attention
Many are old, some are new
Trace your fingertips around them
Get to know them
Get to know me

Keep your eyes on every part of me
I'll be embarrassed at first
But grateful in the end
Memorize all of my blemishes
Get to know them
Get to know me

I don't need a hickey tonight
Your marks are beautiful
But appreciate my own
Kiss my scars with soft lips
Get to know them
Get to know me

How much longer

You’re looking at me again with those eyes.
I know what they want.
There is no meat left here.
Eat up anyways, hungry boy.
I hope you like the taste of skin and bone.

When I am alone,
I sing lullabies to vacant space.
I imagine your grin,
Appreciating my off-key song.

The language of my love
Is in my beating heart
The sincerity of my laugh
My fingers in your hair
The sighs in my kisses
My genuine smiles
The nervous stuttering
How tightly I hold you

You are not here
You cannot fully understand
I struggle to translate

No one desires to be looked at
With a tired pair of eyes:
Grazed over, thrown away.
Everyone desires to be seen
With brand new eyes:
Analyzed, every detail noticed.

Do you see me, love?
It’s been a while since
You first laid eyes on me.
I long to be recognized—
Open up those weary eyes
And you might see again.

Tell me that you love me in a loud, clear voice. I am struggling and cannot understand a mumble at this moment.

Our intimacy ebbs and flows
The ebbs, the drought
It pulls us away from this
Dries us up, we both know

But there are moments when it flows
It pours, the monsoon
We’re caught in the rain
And we’ll stay as long as it goes

Your hands are clumsy but the look is sincere
Hold me until you understand

You are a tree
A strong, beautiful tree
Your roots pull others into you
The others water you for protection
You provide warmth and love
But they are unhappy still
Yearning to be your one and only
You are only here to give
So keep giving, do not worry
Do not tire, do not fret, do not wane
They will learn.

we’ve been chipping away at each other
like old paint falling off the walls
we have become two naked fools
who finally know how average they are

when most things become aged
they are thrown out and replaced
yet for some strange reason
i love you even more than i did before

Another lonely eternity has passed.

When I see you next, please
give me your warmth.
Start at my fingers, my toes.
Work your way inward.
Go to my shoulders, my calves.
Kiss me harder and take your time.
My *******, my thighs.
Find home and love me until
the sun crawls over the horizon;
when we realize that
the world never stopped spinning.
Life needs you back from
This small, momentary heaven.

Another lonely eternity has come.

Your brown eyes are my warm coffee
Your smile is the sweetest sugar
Your touch is the richest cream
I'll hold you like my favorite mug
I feel so full when you are here

Who invented you,
O critic who reflects
The lies of my body?
Our ancestors searched
for the truth deep
inside of themselves.

Please, mirror, show me
The sun in my heart
The heart in my mind
The mind in my soul
Free me from the
Shackles of discontent.

When a fragile thing is dropped,
It shatters and becomes a weapon.

I can see the future. Someday
Your stale eyes will glance over
Mine and finally decide that
They're looking for another.
You deny, deny, deny, but
I know what lives inside your
Mind and finds desires that
I have left, unable to fufill.
I'm waiting in limbo, knowing
The What but not the When or the Why.
Therefore. I'll lick up every
Last drop of affection and hold it
In the back of my throat
Because nothing lasts forever,
Does it?

You picked up my *****, cracked,
******-up glasses from the concrete,
Wiped them off with your sweatshirt,
Balanced them between my eyes,
And everything became a little clearer.

Tell me more of your stories
Stuff them into me until
My existence itself is a reminder
My life
Buried under thoughts of you
I'm okay with that
You can have the shovel

Let my lust rise up
As incense before you
Listen to these hymns
From my ***** mouth

Say your prayers
When you kiss my neck
Tithe to me
But give one hundred percent

Take and eat
My body and my blood
I am drunk
On this communion wine

My arms are sore from trying to reach out to you
The stillness of being loved and ignored
You’ve said you can’t pick up signals
But they are all that I have left

Crazy:
You want it, I’ve got it, I need it.

You’re everything I asked for.
I’m not worried about them;
I only want you more.
They will try to look in and see,
But the windows are foggy,
It’s just you and me.

I have been throwing around tolerance
Like a flower girl tosses her petals.
You have taken advantage of it
And learned the wrong way to treat me.
I feel your boots stomping all over me,
Stomping so hard that I can no longer speak.
I am squished, I am flat, I am buried.
The only direction I can go from here is down.

He gutted me but you filled me

When I’m with you,
You swallow the whole world,
Including me.

When I’m away from you,
I want nothing more
Than to be swallowed again.

Our ancestors survived
On kindness, generosity.
Sharing their harvests,
Holding onto each other.
Why is it that, today,
Survival is dependent on
Selfishness and power?

I used the Big Dipper
To scoop the darkest part
Of my universe out
For your eyes only

But you focused on
Orion and Saturn's Rings
And avoided the space
Between the glowing

Your sweet rhythm in my bones
Leaves me singing your song every night
I am so lucky to have a beat that
Matches the tempo of my own wild heart

warm weather
fresh flowers in your hair
sweet sunshine on your lap
soft honey in your mouth

first freeze
wilted petals at your feet
leaves through your fingers
grey clouds in your eyes

you'll carry me inside

I traced a note on your stomach last night:
"I hope this lasts forever."
The words will never cross the abyss
between my tongue and the world.
The other "forevers" live in the gap;
Only time will tell on this one.

Laying on your chest and
Listening to your heart beat
Like the ticking of a clock,
I can feel the time slipping
Through the vacancies
In between our fingers
Like sand in an hourglass