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meliza Feb 2017
today, i say hello to you
only to say goodbye;
i'll find comfort in your presence
today for the last time.

you used to be my safe haven
my peace, my tranquility
but things are simply meant to end
and it's our time now, maybe.

with the peace we had hand in hand
came the anxiety in my heart
because even back then somehow i knew
that we would fall apart.

and maybe it's time to find comfort
in something that isn't you
because although you were the best for me,
i'll never be good for you.

so today, my love, i say goodbye,
the most bittersweet of words,
as for my mind now walks away,
my heart remains yours, undeterred.
me and writing
meliza Feb 2017
don't words lose meaning when
you say them again and again?*

if i keep repeating your name,
will you finally lose meaning
to me?
meliza Jan 2017
sometimes, I find myself
staring at something yet
nothing at the same time.
like struggling to find
where's the silver lining
between the two of us;
kind of like playing chase,
playing hide-and-seek, but
not quite knowing who's it -
I'd chase after your back
but you're right behind me.
tag, you're it, we'd both think.
but soon we'll get tired of
all the uncertainty
and ever-constant change.
one of us will just stop
while the other goes on
still looking for nothing.
now when I find myself
staring at something and
nothing at the same time,
it reminds me of you,
me and you, you and I -
and what we could've been.
  Jan 2017 meliza
David Lewis Paget
We’d been together so long, it seemed
That nothing could tear us apart,
We lived our lives in a world of dreams
And Barbara lived in my heart,
But frost had covered the window pane
And then it began to snow,
As Barbara turned, with a look of pain
And said, ‘It’s best that you go.’

I didn’t know what she meant at first
As I looked up from my book,
“Go where?’ I questioned, but thought again
As she quelled my heart with a look.
‘I said I want you to leave,’ she cried,
And her face was set in stone,
‘We’ve come to the end of the path,’ she sighed,
‘I want to be left alone.’

Then suddenly all confusion reined
I didn’t know what to say,
Whatever had brought this mood on her,
I wished it would go away.
But she was firm, and she packed my things
And ushered me out the door,
I stood there shivering in the cold
To be back on my own once more.

I found a flat and I camped the night
There was barely a stick or chair,
I’d have to buy all the furniture
To make it a home in there.
But I sat and cried in the empty room
As the question came back, ‘Why?’
I’d loved her so and my heart was torn,
I thought I wanted to die.

I went to her with my questions, but
She slammed the door in my face,
Whatever love she had had for me
Had vanished, without a trace.
It hurt so much that she cut me off
With never so much as a sigh,
I called that all that I wanted was
To tell me the reason, why?

The roses had bloomed so late that year
Were still in the garden bed,
We’d always tended the bush with joy,
We both loved the colour red,
So I snipped one off as I left one day,
And planted it under her door,
To let her know that I loved her still
I didn’t know how to say more.

Her brother called in a week or so,
Said she was in hospital,
She’d gone in just for a minor cure
And thought that he’d better tell.
So I caught the bus and I went on down
With a quaking fear in my heart,
She hadn’t said there was something wrong
Before she tore us apart.

The doctor came in his long white coat,
His brow and his face was grim,
I said, ‘Don’t tell me the news is bad,’
He said, ‘I’m out on a limb.
Your wife just passed from the surgery,
But she pulled, from under her clothes,
And asked if I’d pass this on to you,’
In his hand was a red, red rose.

David Lewis Paget
  Jan 2017 meliza
mygreatestescape
Did the sea
seem inviting
that day?
The way
it must have
taken your breath
away
for you to
say,

"Ah, here
I'll stay,"

Did you love the
sea more
than air
that day?

As the skies
rumbled,
downpouring
their gentle
guilt
in your tangled
mess of hair,

The way
it trickled down
your smiling face
- into your mouth,
I can almost imagine,

Did the sea
not scream
******
as you divulged
beneath
its rough
edged
waves,

Did you not
claw
towards the
heavens,
Did you not
scream
Until
you were
strangled
alive?

Did you love
the sea so dearly,
to let it's
cold
arms
drag you
to even colder
places.
For a friend and another suicide attempt.
meliza Jan 2017
and all the harm that e'er I've done
alas, it was to none but me.*

"I want to die,"  I confess after one too many drinks.
"I want to die," I watch your eyes as your smile slowly shrinks.

"Life is precious," you say; I shouldn't just let go.
"Life is precious," but love, the voices don't think so.

"Everything will be fine," I look up as the stars seemed to dance.
"Everything will be fine," I say firmly to my shaking hands.

"Stay alive," you tell me now, and I nod almost eagerly.
"Stay alive," your voice rings in my head as I watch you leave me.

"Goodnight," my voice sounded clearly in the wind.
"Goodnight," I let the darkness swallow me in.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," I mumble to myself.
"I'm okay, I'm okay," *but liars go to hell.
reposted because of too many revisions. i change my mind too much.
excerpt at the beginning from the song "the parting glass" --
good night and joy be with you all.
meliza Dec 2016
come here by my side, love. find comfort in me.
let's talk over coffee and bad poetry.
i might not be enough, but i'll try, you'll see.

we could wallow together in solitude
and try to be happy as much as we could.
maybe for a while we'll forget that we're *******.

tell me where you're hurt; let me share your burden.
the weight's crushed you under, love; see, you've fallen.
let me lift you up. let me see your smile then.
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