I bended the rules
I told myself I wouldn’t talk to you again
That your words meant nothing to my ears
But then I found myself next to you
In dim light
Talking about our lives
As if we were meeting like friends
And not ex-lovers
And the worst part is
It felt like I was being recovered
From under six feet of dirt
And I could see your face
And it didn’t hurt to smile at you
And maybe it was the fact that
Your words seemed almost true
Like you really did care for me
And that it was just me and you
And that’s all it was ever going to be
Except time got in the way
And distance forced us to change
And you let your heart slip onto another girl
And I learnt how to toss my love onto boys
Who didn’t know how to throw it back
And so I watched you leave
And I watched you go
While I let the darkest parts of me grow
So now I am a tangle of weeds
And I only wanted you to see
That you meant more to me than anything
So I let you touch my arm
And lead the way
Because you took my heart by surprise
On that fateful day
And the time we share now
I will make it last till the end
Because I always loved you
So my rules,
I can bend

If you love her
please remember
she burns like
Hyrogen sulfide and nitric acid
lit in the middle of the night
and so perhaps when you hold her
don’t hold too tight
because she will light up the night
As she sets her sights on you
and if you’re not ready for it
she’ll burn you through
because she doesn’t know how to stop
and how to forgive
so she rips apart others
as a way to cope, and to live
so just know
that if you love her
her love is a sin
so say your prayers
and count your blessings
for this is not a battle that you can win
And  if worst-comes-to-worst
Leave her with a kiss
and a goodbye
and don’t turn back
for in the dead of night
She’ll sound the alarm
and raise the attack
She was born a warrior
and set out to fight
but deep down she can learn to love you
you just have to show her that light

"text me when you get here"
I asked him to say
But instead of a text, a policeman called
and it rained the day I put flowers on your grave

He
        left
              without  
                              reasons
Said
        goodbye
                        with
                                 empty
                                             words
Winter
             is
                 such
                          a
                            cold
                                    season
Hollowed
                    in
                          broken
                                        thirds

By the third ***** shot down
I had forgot your name
and the way you used to kiss me
but even though I couldn’t stand up straight
you told me that you missed me
and then all the feelings came back
like empty bullet shells
burning holes into my skin
and though I tried to stop it
little bits of you kept flooding in
and soon all I could hear
was you saying my name
so I drank more
in that hope that I might be able to disappear
between you arms
and never be found again

I care for people so much
that I don’t care for myself
so I let you stand like a temple
wrapped in rubies and gold
while I am a pile of rubble
under 10 feet of dirt
and its not that I don’t want
to lead you a hand
but just know
that when you take it
you must understand
That through this act
I will give you my all
and you will rise
but I shall fall

I think we are all a little unsure of ourselves
and perhaps we’ll never find out why
but no matter what
I’ll never stop looking