I walk lonely as clouds
where do the crossroads meet
i dream of things i have never seen
it makes me long for paradise on earth
my thoughts at night are
Dangerous enough to destroy the ******* towers of Hong Kong
powerful enough to break through darkness
soft enough to melt every sadness
with a touch of love and sweet memories
Yes, i am a night owl
Some call me a nocturnal bee or the crazy thinker
Because, the NIGHT was made for
Lovers, writers, poets, artists, painters and thinkers like myself

It was on the 31st day of the 7th month in the year 1990
On a cold Tuesday night at the Bota hospital, Limbe
At 11:45pm
I finally came out with a cry for attention and love,
After a long struggle between life and death -
as the doctors tried to save my ailing mother's life.
Mom was bleeding helplessly
I was almost forgotten on a table wrapped in a linen cloth
The mosquitoes feasted on my succulent pinkish body
I cannot tell if my cry was one of Joy, to be born into an unknown world
Or; a cry of pain and misery to be abandoned on a hospital table
like an Orphan child
My grandparents were trying to save the life of my mother, their beloved daughter and they almost forgot about the poor little child that was born
As they told me, my mother passed out from the surgery
when she woke up the next morning,
It was like she was in a trance and she shouted to see the baby
The nurses had to hold her down because she just had a surgery
and didn't need to strain the stitches below her belly
Then, i was brought in to meet my very biological mother
She held me in her arms and hugged me, and her eyes filled with tears
Then, i could hear her heart whisper;
"I wouldn't have known what you looked like my poor child"
At that point, i giggled in her arms and am sure if she could understand
a baby's language; I was only telling her
"Never you leave me again Mother"
That is the story of my birth;
The "Extra-Ordinary" child was born into an "Unknown" world!

She wore her pain like high heels
She was so confident in them and the way she carried herself/pain
She let her tears pour like raindrops from a burst sky
knowing that there must be a rainfall before the rainbow
She was strong enough to show her scars to the world
because sometimes perfection comes from broken things
She was broken,
She was hurt,
She was a poet,
She let her ink own the skies
She was beautiful in all her imperfections

Sometimes we do not always get what we want in life
But then, we should be thankful for the small things we have…
A forgiveness granted
A loving family
A friendship deepened
A talent discovered
A goal attained
An accident avoided
A gratitude spoken
A difficult concept mastered
A love recovered
A new opening
A blessing received
A natural wonder witnessed
If we put all these together,
Then we realize that we are truly blessed beyond measures
So, Be thankful!

B-aby don't sit there in
R-ags like a slave girl
O-nly you can set this
K-ite to fly again
E-verything grows again,
N-ever underestimate your
T-ransparent heart.
H-ealing comes with time
I-nhale the sweetness of the
N-ight, let your light
G-low all through, even when the
S-un goes down.

I used to fear thunder and lightening
But now I pray for it.
I used to fear storms
But now I pray for it.
I used to fear darkness
But now I pray for it.
I used to fear silence
But now I pray for it -

Knowing that everything
I've ever feared has only made me
STRONGER

Come hither my love
Let's dance all niGHT
Under the moon liGHT
Till the moon is out of siGHT-
Hold me tiGHT
With all your miGHT
So we can feel it riGHT
And know our love is briGHT
Baby, we'll be alriGHT
With the sunliGHT
If we leave behind every weiGHT
And just aim for the spotliGHT

Why do you want to tell me all your secrets
Don't you know I'm the girl who never falls
Why do you want to pour out your heart to me
When you know I'll hit the road every single time it calls

Please, don't tell me you love me
Cause i wouldn't know what to do with myself

Why do you want to visit me
Don't you know I'm a loner
Why do you want to waste your time on me
When you know I'll break your heart every single time you try

Please, don't tell me you love me
Cause i wouldn't know what to do with myself

She's been through hell
more than anyone could understand
more than she'll ever share
it's a mystery how her heart still beats
and how she keeps that smile on her face
her mind never stops
it keeps working like a time machine
neither do her thoughts of feeling less than enough
she just wants someone to laugh with
and tears when she hurts
she is tired of doing it all by herself
she needs someone to lean on to when she feels the weight of everything upon her shoulders

I am Marhteena
I come from a small village in southern Cameroon where people use kerosene lamps at night and store drinking water in large aluminium pots.
where neighbors share kitchen utensils on a daily basis and eat from the same bowls of soup with one another.
where children go to the streams in the morning to fetch some water for cooking and rake the woods for some firewood.
where women go to their farms to plant corn, yams and vegetables while the men tap fresh palm wine and tend the goats and pigs.
where children play under the scorching sun and eat roasted grasshoppers for lunch.
where children make their own toys from rafiagrass and abandoned wires
where children climb trees and hunt birds with their catapults
where children go fishing with small bowls and learn how to swim by themselves
where children sat around fireplaces at night to tell folktales and ancient stories
I am Marhteena, i come from a very small clan but these experiences have shaped me into who i am today
I AM PROUDLY AFRICAN!!!

There are people in our lives
who understand our silence
and so, become our words
when we cannot speak.

They become light
when it gets too dark
And we cannot find our way.

They become a rainbow
when we've been so beaten
and forget to shine.

And then, there are those
who come like the rain,
not to quench our thirst
but to sift you away like dirt.

La tendresse c'est une sourire
qu'on ne peut jamais oublies
La tendresse
c'est une femme amoureuse

Tenderness is a smile
that can never be forgotten
Tenderness is a woman in love

Dear World,
Ooh how you treat me like a Robot
I'm forced to act and work like a machine almost
every other day
When will all these pressures end?

Dear Africa,
Ooh how you make me feel like Clown
I'm forced to smile at the things i don't want to
almost every other day
When will all these pressures end?

Dear School,
Ooh how you treat me like a modern slave
I'm forced to memorize lots of dates and words
almost every other day
When will all these pressures end?

Dear Work,
Ooh how you treat me like your "errand girl"
I'm forced to show up in snow or rain or sunshine
almost every other day
When will all these pressures end?

Dear Parents,
Ooh how you treat me like a prisoner
I'm forced to tell you wherever i'm going to
almost every other day
When will all these pressures end?

Dear Mimi...
We got all your letters
Love;
World, Africa, School, Work and Parents!

I write love letters to myself,
to remind me of who I was
and then to who I'm becoming--
because she needs to know that she's doing well.

I write letters to my younger self
I want her to know that she lived her best life.
I only wish she knew that and didn't try as hard
to impress people...

I write letters to my future self,
I want her to know that she'll make
a badass wife and a good mother.
I am so proud of you already!

Just like a rainbow after the storm
Just like the calm of the sea after the waves
Just like sunshine after the rains
Just like Spring after the winter
Just like the rising moon at night
Just like the cry of an infant at birth
Peace brings back that tranquility
It heals all the pains of yesterday
It refreshes the soul and uplifts our spirits
Peace is all we'll ever need in order to thrive on!

How do we comprehend God
When He takes away your best friend
On the same day and year,
He gives you a little sister?
"You give and take away" Oh God

I miss you "Martha"
Your beautiful smiles and laughter
I don't know how I've survived these 9 yrs
Without you

Every passing year, as Cathy turns a year older
It reminds me of a "sister-friendship" I had with you "Martha"

I miss you terribly
You will never be forgotten

Adieu "Sweet Martha"

I believe in Garri
The holy son of Africa
Who was conceived by our toils
Born of the ****** Cassava
Suffered under the grater
Was suffocated in bags, died and buried
He descended into hell
On the third day he arose
And is now seated on the Centre of the frying ***

I belive in Garri
The savior of the lives
The defender of the weak
And the universal mother of all

My Quiet times
Are the ones that speak
louder than all the noise
My Darkest parts
Are the ones that shine brighter
than the sun
My Deepest scars
Are the ones that leave
the most beautiful memories

Her most priced jewelry
           Is the glitter of the tears from her eyes.
Others say it is the sparkle of her eyes
           When she smiles --
But, only she knows
That her tears are more expensive than her smiles ...

Wednesday lover
you bring out the music in me
that makes me sing loud like a ****-a-doo-doo
Wednesday lover
You're the mirror in which i see my very own reflection
nostalgia, Aahhh ...
that longing for something familiar

I am Ngose,
I come from a small village called Muyuka (Cameroon).
My tribe (Balong) is almost extinct.
Where I come from is simply beautiful.
Beautiful in its rivers that flow behind our houses
Beautiful in the dancing trees that give us shade on sunny days
Beautiful in its sand that burns beneath our feet
Beautiful in the music that is sung in the market square
My village is absolutely beautiful!

I am Martina,
I may not be like the girls you see on the cover page of a magazine
I may not be dressed in designers and exotic fashion
I may not have lived in luxurious places
I may not have the taste or styles people admire
I may not own anything deemed worthy or wealthy
BUT, I am CONTENT
Beacuse, I know where I come from!!!

My heart sinks
as i watch the sun slip into the clouds
and the days lost in a trance
yet, another day/month
without my love
here with me