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Marilina Jul 2022
You dream for your life
To be a beautiful story.
And sure, sometimes things
Work out on their own.
But sometimes they don’t.
Sometimes you need to work hard
To get your “happily ever after”.
But maybe there’s none.
Not a fairytale, but a tragedy.
It’s still a beautiful story.
Marilina Oct 2022
I made a wish
I set a goal
I marked the date
I work towards it

But

I have a feeling
That I won’t accomplish it

Again
Marilina Dec 2022
You are a horrible choice
Yet so appealing
Marilina Mar 2022
After the war
I promise to find you.
To hug you so tight
And never let go
Marilina Oct 2018
Autumn
Sweaters Scarves
Drizzling Raining Pouring
Umbrellas Boots Witches Ghosts
Coming Creeping Scaring
Mysterious Ghastly
Halloween
Marilina Sep 2021
I envy the birds
How they spread their wings
And soar through the sky

Not a thought on their mind
Free to fly far away
Let the wind carry them

But here I am locked
In this small gilded cage
And my wings are clipped
Marilina Sep 2018
Have you ever tried not to breathe?
Some can hold their breath for a while.
Some for only a little bit of time.

Eventually you take another breath.
Something in your body stops you
From suffocating.

Same with you.

Something doesn't let me forget you.
I keep on thinking of you.

For a while.
For a little bit of time.
I'm losing my breath...
Marilina Nov 2021
I catch myself thinking that
You haven’t crossed my mind lately
And that makes me happy
Marilina Oct 2021
I’ve lost people before
To distance, time
Plain circumstance

I never thought I’d lose you
Or so I hoped
But here we are
Marilina Dec 2021
I’m lost in here
And no one can see me
It’s hard to find yourself
When it is so dark
Marilina Sep 2021
It’s funny how sometimes
A month can feel like a day
And a day can drag on
Like a month
Marilina Sep 2018
You can't just assume
Things about someone
Just because they act
Just the way they do.
Just because they're different
And are not like you.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Do you think the crowd
Might think better of you?
Marilina Apr 2022
Do I
Do I not
Should I
Should I not
Marilina Aug 2022
To be honest I don’t even care
What you’ll choose to do
To stay or to leave
Just don’t stand in the doorway
Marilina Dec 2018
I am surrounded by people
But I feel alone

They discuss things together
But I am excluded

Whenever I speak up
They treat me like an empty space

So I just stopped trying


Only silence greets me back in the morning
Marilina May 2022
I like you but
You are a pain.
But a familiar one.
One you can tolerate.
But why should I suffer?
You remind me of the things
That I’ve known my whole life
And want to change and to escape
This vicious cycle of childhood trauma
I guess it’s not a good relationship?
But for some reason people
Always choose to suffer.
It is all they’ve known
Their whole life.
A familiar
Pain.
Marilina Aug 2022
You and I are either fated or doomed
Because we’ve faced so much struggle
Now this relationship opens a wound
And everything’s turning to rubble

We could have succeeded, you know
If only we were willing to fight
But now no one’s interested though
Neither you, nor I
Marilina Dec 2021
My dearest friend
You’re not alone
Bad things will end
All will be gone
Marilina Dec 2021
You haunt my dreams
I feel unease
But when I wake
I don’t find peace
Marilina Jan 2023
You aren’t mine
And I’m not yours
There is no way -
You’ll always be hers
Marilina Sep 2018
Don't get your hopes too high
Dreams tend to get shattered
Marilina Oct 2018
You've left my mind
At last
Marilina Sep 2021
So much to see
So much to learn
I’m in too deep
How to return?
Marilina Sep 2021
Summer’s gone
You went away
Hoped to stay friends
To stay in touch

We do still talk
But not as much
It’s not the same
Oh not at all

Summer’s gone
You went away
I hate it now
It’s not the same
I wish the circumstances were different
Marilina Sep 2021
I’ve always put reason before happiness
For once I thought
***** this
Let me be happy
Just let me be
For once

And I was
For a moment
And it felt liberating
But then it ended
I was *******
Marilina Oct 2021
I don’t write poems in my language
The pain becomes too real
The wound that’s left is deep
It’s better not to feel

I don’t write poems in my language
I feel detached from this ordeal
Like all this didn’t happen
But writing helps me heal
Marilina Oct 2022
Daydreaming of a future
Where the two of us are together
With everything going
According plan

I don’t know how it will turn out
All I have is blind hope
But realistically speaking
There is little chance
Marilina Jun 2022
It’s June already
Half a year gone
I haven’t noticed
Been robbed of it,
Of a normal life

The war’s been going for a while
But I still haven’t learnt how to live
But to live on
Survive
I know everyone is tired of the news. Ukraine is not making headlines anymore but people are still dying and cities are being bombed everyday. Please continue supporting Ukraine 🙏
Marilina Dec 2018
You changed
You don't seem like yourself
As if you turned into a different person

Or maybe you didn't
Maybe you always were like this
And I just never knew
The real you
Marilina Apr 2022
Your silence speaks volumes
I heard your message
Loud and clear

So here is mine, friend
This is the last you’ll hear from me
Marilina Sep 2021
You used to lie right next to me
So close
But now you’re far and gone

I used to think our souls were tied
So tight
But now I think they’re torn
Marilina Oct 2021
There’s so much noise
Inside my head
The constant buzz
Unending dread

I keep on turning
In my bed
Twisting and thrashing
Thoughts run ahead

There’s so much noise
Inside my head
The constant buzz
It doesn’t end
Marilina Oct 2021
It’s been a month
Or even more
Since you’ve been gone
Not to return

I went outside
And met someone
But they’re not you
There’s none like you
Marilina Jun 2022
Are we drifting apart
Or is this normal
Are we falling apart
Or is this normal
Have you lost interest
Or is this normal
Will you still wait for me
Or are we done
Marilina Feb 2022
Type….

Erase

Type…

Erase

Nothing seems right
Stuck in one place
Marilina Feb 2022
When you put on a different shirt
Or make your hair a different way
Your life might take a different turn

But not for me
And not today
Marilina Oct 2021
The pain
It comes and goes
One day it’s there
The next it’s gone

One day you’re good
The next you’re not
You can’t press “mute”
Do what you want
Marilina Apr 2022
That’s a low bar to be honest.
But the best you can hope for in times of war
When peaceful sleep has become a luxury.
I’m physically fine.
Marilina Oct 2021
I’m in this room
Four walls
A ceiling
***** floor

Big window
Heavy curtains
Unmade bed
A wooden door

It’s open
I can go
But I don’t
No more
Marilina Jun 2022
I have nothing to say
So I stay silent
But on the inside I’m screaming
As something sinks it’s claws
And tears my soul apart
Marilina Jan 2022
I dread going to sleep
Because falling asleep
Means waking up in the morning
And going on with my life
I have no control over
Marilina Apr 2022
You don’t know if you’ll survive today
You don’t know if you’ll survive tomorrow
You can hope that your loved ones are safe
Pray they don’t suffer and feel no sorrow
Tea
Marilina Oct 2021
Tea
I spilled the tea
The cup is empty
All that was needed
Had been said
Marilina Dec 2021
I knew it would end
One day you had to go
We’ve run out of time
Why did it have to be so?

We met again not long ago
So we could say goodbye
Last kiss, one last embrace
I was the only one to cry
I wrote this back in September but forgot to post it
Marilina May 2022
It will all pass with time
But waiting is torture
Marilina Jan 2022
I din’t tell you “no”
I didn’t tell you “yes”
And now I sit alone
Now I feel like a mess
Marilina Sep 2018
Why don't you look at me?
Why don't we ever talk?
We're both so similar:
Both quiet and calm.
I like to think we're smart.
We have similar views on things
And get each others jokes!

Yet we don't talk a lot.
And you don't look at me.

At break you always sit there
Staring at your phone.
All alone.
But you never look at me.
You never say hello.
Only rarely say goodbye.
But never look me in the eye.

You never text me first.
However, if you do,
You ask me what the homework was.
Is there nothing else you'd like to ask?

We spoke before, on a bus ride home.
Or at the theatre, we even sat together!
But it felt awkward and forced.
I started it, of course.

Though you have texted me once.
This summer.
You said 'hello'
And asked me how I was.

Yet we don't talk a lot.
And you don't look at me.
I don't know what to feel. I don't know how I feel. What do you feel?
Marilina Sep 2021
Thought I moved on
Felt guilty but relieved
And then I looked
Into your amber eyes
And fell for you again
Found a photo of my ex and it brought up feelings I thought were already buried
Marilina Sep 2021
It felt like a trick
But there was no evidence
Just a feeling

I guess I always expect the worst
Or maybe I’m blind

— The End —