I step back and hand you the reins, to this, my sinking ship,

only truth knows lies, as it passes through you, your lips.

I struck a chord, or a nerve, it helps me value my worth,

desperate eyes have been searching for someone like you, since birth.

An idea that is formed in the minds of man,

You and I together - Fate had another plan.

I smile as sadness invades my pores,

Our mystery and intrigue, your beauty the stuff of Lore.

For comfort, I whisper your name at night,

It gets me through the darkness until that morning light.

My eyes renewed, a new day has begun,

you, before me, until the setting of the sun.

I reach for your hand, to secure it in place,

the life of past loves, gone without a trace.

A wall made of words, my past: my mortar,

the time that we have only gets shorter.

The days fly by, just gone in a flash,

tomorrow becomes yesterday, our forever past.

Late nights spent together, asleep in each other's arms,

all that I ask for, as you resist my charms.

Cautious you crept, and slowly you caved,

unsure still, based on past loves that you gave.

Greedy mind of mine, glued to your side,

instead I chose clever words, for my feelings to hide.

There's a smile buried somewhere, there, in your heart,
let's retrace our steps, rewind, back to the start.

Forever forgiving you were to me, I, persisting,
together at last now, more than simply....existing.

Thoughts turned to words based on what we believe,
the length of time: forever, is what I perceive.

Trusted ties to reveal bolder men's lies,
with you, walls collapse and heartache dies.

An island, you seem, set all alone,
me, your rock, your safety and pillar of stone.

A finger brushes lightly against your face,
your smile reminds me that I'm in the right place.

An ocean of wonder reflecting the brightest stars,
a lifetime of forgiveness, healing our deepest scars.

I searched in myself to help try and find the "me",
how do I prepare myself when it's you that I see?

They say out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks,
that must be why "I love you" is what your ears seek.

Like a shadow in the night, you stole my heart from my chest,
like the fists of a fight, you fought and confessed.

You're the arrow, the fear, the calm before the storm,
you're beautiful, magnificent and love in its truest form.

You're the anger, the strong, the hope that I need,
as each beat of my heart, your name, it bleeds.

We stand there listening to our hearts increased pounding,

screams are no longer heard, they’ve left us to our drowning.

Your words encourage, lift up, and wash away all ire,

A mode of respect, a taste of morale victory that will always inspire.

Every future idea, a moment of consistent need,

all of your energy, attention, and efforts fuel my greed.

A hidden meaning presented in perfect plain sight,

a loose embrace, or hand held tight gets me through each night.

A way with words, and each syllable increased meaning,

the curve of these lips lift up a soul that’s comfortably beaming.

There’s a knock on Death’s door as you perform compression's,

A stable stream of stagnant lies that helped cover me in depression,

some half-truths, and even more half-measures,

have led me to reduce my self worth and avoid most pleasures.

Then there’s you: a light-wielding saint with unmatched power,

a simple word, or look helps raise me up in my darkest hour.

You are warm and welcoming, a shelter for my deepest hurt,

a shovel fit to bury each woe and regret under a world of dirt.

I loved you yesterday- I just didn’t know it then.

when the wind whistled and brushed the branches against the shed,

that was when I put the image of you and I in my head.

I loved you today, and I didn’t realize it then,

As new snow fell, it reminded me that no two flakes are alike,

and our similarities are ghost like, existing between worlds.

I loved you tomorrow, and I’m realizing it even now,

I swore at the ******* morning birds singing their song,

and it reminded me of you in the mornings and how i’m always wrong.

I loved you since I can remember, and it’s apparent now,

from the moments that as a baby I took my first steps,

sometimes cruel and calculated, they led me to you.....somehow,

I loved you in my early years, and I never put it together,

since I could form sounds and words, it was to tell you “I love you.”

I’ll love you light years from now, when our bodies are busted and turned to dust,

I’ll hold each memory of us failing and succeeding together and all of our trust.

I love you in the here and now, with each mistake being almost enough for me to break,

it’s us, it’s you, it’s everything that falls in between yesterday, today, and tomorrow that I can take.

I loved you yesterday, I love you today, and I will love you tomorrow.

I have a death grip on this razor blade against my wrist,

praying to whatever god will listen that I slip, wishing I had a nervous tick.

Then I’d have someone or something else to blame it on so it wouldn’t be my fault.

We’re the salt of the earth?

Being drug behind a stalled out hearse?

A family in disbelief, “There’s no way they’d do this! It must be a mistake!”

Tell me that as I sink deeper into sorrow and produce this smile - so fake.

There’s a lot to learn, an image ingrained which we’ve been told is to help us succeed.

I’m only halfway home and I’ve already halfway loaded the gun,

only a pound of pressure is what’s needed for us to proceed.

Numbers exist to call as a stranger pretends to care,

their eight hour shift almost over so they can delete the buzzing in the air.

I’ve never really wanted toast in the tub until I saw what it could do,

I picture myself, my life, my beginning and my end,
and all I can think about - is you.

You are my beacon, my comfort, the reason I breath,

A piece of fate that’s fallen out of it’s trajectory and landed you with me.

I love you. I love you. I love you. Again, again and again.

But now it’s time to sleep, and hope that the darkness isn’t there or selfish enough for me to keep.

A limited remedy, closed, underneath an iron grip,

a stolen moment, reaching out, distracted by the swaying of your hips.

Embrace me, swallow down each simple regret,

peeling back layer and layer, a reminder to forgive, but never ******* forget.

Hold still, a steady shaking, a tremble barely there on your lips,

this ship has sailed, steady blowing, wind buried to our backs,

you make up the terrible portions of me that I’ve always lacked.

Trip - slip, and dip into forever, a stream that lends itself to pleasure,

acquire happiness, somehow, each day alive somehow a valid measure.

“Living the dream,” you scream, as you die every sleep,

“Tomorrow will be different,” you plead, convincing yourself that you care.

Arise each afternoon, the day you’ve slept away,

cuts and curses of life fall into your lap, as if there’s any other way.

A yawn comes at the most precarious time, the moment you needed to hear the most,

blocking out each “make-believe” try, lost like sand to the coast.

I’ve lost the will to change, each do-over and try again, just ends the same,

you snap your head at the slightest sound, like anyone truly knows your name.

A shallow grave filled with wasted compliments,

drowning slowly in wave after wave of “pick me ups”.

Toss a coin and send me on my way,

begging time for another re-do, a way to un-ring the bell,

watch my hope sink to the bottom of a moldy wishing well.

Depression looms like the moon on a cloudy night,

visible, yet subdued, reminding us of our plight.

Knocking once, a temptress to make sure that you’re alone,

there’s force behind the kick applied to the door of the home.

Now it’s here. It’s in. A permanent resting place,

foolish enough to believe each smile plastered to our face.

Bury the hatchet, try to lock the door as it convinces you to unlatch it.

You’re me now. An identity set in stone that makes us no longer who we used to be.

There’s a place for you to pace, but it exists over there,

smile fading, face changing, “I like living in the head underneath your hair.”

The bonus of insomnia is that the nightmares stay at bay,

close your eyes, empty into forever, living in unhappy can’t be the only way.

I pick apart rust from the thoughts formed in this vat of mine,

A decision eats away agony, keeping my  positivity in line.