When my heart trembles and shakes.
My tears become lakes.
So tired of the fakes.
I tend to lose control of myself and hate the mess it makes.
The more tangled things get, the more effort it takes...

No flower can be fostered in this darkness, all consuming.
All alone and left to wilt, never blooming.
Each petal swept away, the face of death ever looming.
Crumbling to the earth, slowly the emptiness is so entombing.

Every foot step, every mile, I sit there wanting to linger a while.
Hoping you'll call me home, by your side.
Where my heart likes to hide.
I feel it break a little more, it feels so tender, strained and sore.
Why is this just too hard for me to take?
Hard to ignore this bitter heartache.

I can't stand this.
Every mile I get away from you, makes me sick, feeling lost in nothingness.
I can't seem to hold off the pain, this town makes me go insane.
I hate it, I hate this place.
Here I feel I've got nothing to gain.
Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
No place to my name.

Within your eyes, I am magnetized.
Green and glimmering, the shaky hand of fate instantly realized.
Draw me in, drown me in the sweetest sin.
Your gentle hands, a wildfire burning through my skin.

Blushing, as you kiss me, I feel fullfilled, waking up, blooming.
Ours is a passion all consuming.

This empty cup, it overflows. Within, a new love slowly grows.
Each of us only silently knows. As I dread the morning when he always goes.

How we fit together, like no other could before.
Every last embrace, always leaving me wanting more.
I considered running away, but oh how it's you I adore.

Your smile it warms me up on the coldest day.
I want to run my fingers through your dark curls and sweetly ask you to stay. Nervously, ask you if you feel the same way?

Am I alone in this aching need?
This silent plead.

There was more to this connection than a fleeting escape from our disparate lives and our broken pasts. I can't help but think this is a love that lasts.

Can we give it a try? Can we give it a go?
You're so far away, but I would be willing to take it slow.
The moment I met you was the moment I would know.
There was nobody else, I didn't want to have to let you go.

I made a wish, spoke it out to the universe, screamed it with my heart. A hope for a new love, a new start.

A home where the passion didn't die.
A love that wouldn't lie-
to escape loneliness or their own despair.
A love who would always dare.

Baby, can we dance in harmony?
Can you help to set me free?
Let's runaway together, you and me.
I promise it'll be an adventure, one that was meant to be.

This is a delicate game.
To wait and see-
if our feelings are the same.

Sometimes I think the world spreads me thin,
lays my skin across a tapestry.
Searching not far enough within just to try and master me.
They try to twist me to a design that they find satisfactory.
It's getting hard to see, who I am over what other's want of me...
taking what they can and doing so happily.
Leaving me to falsely believe
that they actually like me.

You stand today, though you're isolated by fear.
Thinking it's best to stay here and near.
Can't take one more step, you grow paralyzed.
You make all these plans, though they are endlessly revised.
Stepping backwards again to that comfortable lie.
You're so lost in your doubt yet aching to try.
Surrounded by faces but trapped behind glass walls.
Cracking and breaking yet none of them falls.
I pound my fists to the hard brittle truth-can't seem to get through.
I try and I try but never seem able to reach out to you.

I'm pretty sure I'll black out the sky and redo the stars within a better design.
You'll reminisce for those days when I called you mine.
When you've had enough of being alone, you'll find me again and miss what I've shown.
But will it all have been worth it when you no longer make my stars fall from the sky?
When I've grown cold from a heart left to die.
Love's fire smothered by the ashes of pain.
Please don't let us die in vain.

You know how Emily said Hope is a thing with wings?

Well mine is nosediving and I can't believe how much it stings.

Despair it grips my soul,
And all I hear is screams.
They always echo on repeat and swallow up my dreams.

I used to love your arms around me.
Now they are suffocating.

I used to believe in one and only-
Now it just feels lonely.

I used to imagine a white wedding,
Now that thinking is steady resetting.

I used to do anything just to see you smile,
Now I know I haven't made you happy in a long while.

I used to believe in magic. Now it's all just noise.
Once the static passes, it's the silence that destroys.

I used to be a hopeless romantic-
Now I am only just hopeless.

It's all in shades of grey.
Decisions you made you can't wash away.
As you are spiraling down, buried by the words you never meant to say.
Searching, like a fool, to find another way.
Living for tomorrow and never for today.

Blank canvas, layers, peeling, past pains, loss, just a little paint thinner to wear it all down.
Gonna paint the next layer thin, again and again.
So it doesn't hurt as much when I peel it all off.
Blisters under my nails.
Stinging tears.
I have only one canvas and it's painting all my fears.
Weathered wood and fraying ends.
This is where it all begins.

I guess It's really over, this life we made.
It singed and scoured the clay in our hearts, though it was poorly molded. Still, this is not how I thought we'd fade.
Still our life was wrongly folded.
Foolishly smiling in the midst of all the pain, I guess with me there's nothing to gain.
This life has fallen, shattered on the floor, I just wish I didn't care anymore.
I guess our love was just a pottery class failure from the very start.
The proof is in my now broken heart.

Loss
chip
Violence
nic
Trauma
chip

With each chip I find it harder to feel.
Every nic makes my world feel less real.

Bruises
nic
Scars
chip
Tears
nic

Each more takes a bit of my heart.
Tearing me even further apart.

Betrayal
chip
Abandonment
nic
Loneliness
chip

I am losing myself it seems.
On this path of shattered dreams.

crack

Each one a new crack in my foundation.
Till I come crumbling down.
Just a linear step to stagnation.
Losing my words--they're all I have left.
Now I am stuck praying for damnation.

crack

I am slipping. Further away.
Lost in the memories of yesterday.
I have lost my voice-I don't know what to do. What to say.

shatter

I stomp on my broken pieces just to relive the pain.
I worry that I am too broken and just a touch insane.
'Cause I need a little sunshine to balance out this rain.
They say it just takes a little bleach to take out the bloodstain.

I am slipping through the cracks it seems.
But I want to glue the pieces back together.
I want to to be free and chase my dreams.
But my moods are changing like the weather.

I just wanna be lighter than a feather.

I am tired of carrying the pieces around. Some pieces already lost and won't ever to be found.

Can I just grind them to dust and blow them away? Lessen the weight of what used to be.
Can I craft a new vessel and gain the power to be free?

Free of all the broken bits of me?