I've been struggling with this same pain for as long as i can remember.
being dragged in and out of hospitals getting told she will be okay.
that pain and fear dragged me into depression and suicidal thoughts, wanting to take my life became a huge part of my life.
self harming, cutting to see blood, feel blood, taste blood. the pain came a thrill.
depression and anxiety didnt help me much either, drowning me in my own thoughts. Telling me im not good enough and i should **** myself cause im not worth living on this earth. There are more people who need the air and space i take up.
now sitting here in the bath with blades and pills contemplating once again if im worth it and if i should take my life.