lovejunkie Dec 7

And now it strikes
Like the first blizzard
After the last unexpected melt
From the last blizzard

I waited so long with only one
Single crystalline wish
For it finally to be over
But now that it is
I find myself with nothing
Apparent to look forward to
And long for the days
When I still missed you

Maybe freedom really is just another word for nothing left to lose.
lovejunkie Nov 22

some people, after getting their hearts
broken, they stop beliving in something
very important, that love conquers all,
only love abides; they risk growing
jaded and bitter the further they
stray from this belief, trust me
dear reader, for i lived it myself.
but there is a secret that i learned
that love does conquer all, it is the
most powerful force in the entire
universe, it shatters the shackles
of all rules, and every law that
is not pure and good, it is more
powerful than all the armies, all
the governments that have ever
roamed this earth put together...
and the secret? the secret is that the
love must be reciprocal, for one loving
another without receiving it in kind, sadly
unrequited, that is only one half that by
itself is painful and fleeting, it kills
instead of bringing life, and it
will either end up dead, or
killing the one who lives
without it, but, ahhhhh
when two halves meet
in true love, equally
measured and weighted
and matched to the one thing
the when the halves meet they
will find one thing that no one
else ever has; each other, maybe
not a perfect match for another, but
a perfect match for the two of them,
and that is the love of all-power, the
most irreducible, the most glorious
thing that this life has to offer, and,
often, its first steps are in forgiving
the one who could not love you back.

lovejunkie Nov 22

i feel flourishes
like the full john philip sousa
horn section all blasting at once
inside of my heart, no, not my heart,
not this time, but inside my spirit...
a new day is dawning, and even
more than what is to come, i am
overjoyed at a remembering,
the remembering of who i
was, a strong man, a wise
and a smart man, a kind
man and a devoted man,
whose heart i am slowly
sliding back inside my
chest, becoming the
man i used to be,
and still unwritten,
a happy man... happy,
it seems such a foreign
concept it's been so long,
the man i was born to be
and for a long time was
until i was not allowed
to be him, i was only
allowed to be what
she wanted at any
given second... but
i hold no bitterness in
my heart, it all now seems
just like a bad dream that is
turning to vapour with every
passing second, for i now can
again be me... i am again free

a light at the end of the tunnel,
and realizing that all along,
though the light was always
there, the tunnel was imaginery
and i'll never betray who i am as
a person, ever, ever again
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