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30
Lost for words Nov 2009
30
I've spent so long trying
To forget each cringeworthy day
My mistakes & decisions
Took so long to go away

I've been a million different things
A million different times
I've done so many different things
Committed many crimes

I've changed my personality
And reinvented who I am
I don't recognise myself
I'm amazed that others can

I try not to talk about
The crazy times back then
The drama, the men, the music
The life of way back when

And now the people left behind
The good within the bad
In passing on the past
I lost out on what I had

This rolling stone has stopped at last
Ready to retrace her track
I think they've forgotten now...
Is it too late to go back?
Lost for words Sep 2010
Your sunlight wakes me with a gentle glow
Lifting me from the sleep below
Your omnipresent blue twinkles serenely
While your beauty overwhelms obscenely
Each street a new promise of adventures new
And distant islands known to few
Your water so powerful cleanses all
Sweeping under bridges so tall
The mystery of your Eastern delight
Keeps me with you every night
Smoky, silky, rich and heady
Always waiting, always ready
I rely on you to lift my frown
And you have never let me down
Cacophany of noise, your urban voice
Embodied by life and love and choice
Towers on which a thousand summers have shone
Here long  before me and long after I've gone
Five times a day you sing out your chorus
Reminder I share you with each grubby tourist
But underneath this ancient dome
I know you are mine; my City, my home
Lost for words Jun 2017
Hearing you moan about the baby weight
While warming up the Cow and Gate
Droopy tum and ***** ****** dry
And how they leak at every cry
Your body will never be the same
Ever since the baby came
Constantly exhausted beyond all belief
When they finally sleep through, dear God, the relief
Training and tantrums, toddlers are trying
You learn to accept they never stop crying
Oh to be one of those wretched souls!
Sterilising bottles and benches and bowls
Gaining those precious protective pounds
Awakening to those unmistakable sounds
Washing and folding and wiping and feeding
All the work that comes with breeding
And now the sun sets on that part of my life
Never a mother, only a wife
For all those hopes that didn't make it
Bun in the oven but unable to bake it
Trying not to envy and regret and hate
But I just can't shift the baby wait...
Lost for words Jul 2010
"Boo"
The echo of you is in my mind
My gigantic, magnificient friend
Who society left behind...

What made you? Why did you?
How could you not know?
How much we all need you -
Did we not let it show?
Did you not see the love
In the smiles you grew?
If I could go back...
If you only knew.

That dark, lonely morning
You felt so alone
No one to rest with
No one to phone
The thought leaves me cold
And so angry with you
If I could go back...
If you only knew.

I see you at night,
Dancing and smoking
I know any day
You'll tell us you're joking
Back with a bang
In a nightclub queue
If I could go back, Olly,
If only you knew.
Lost for words Oct 2010
Don't waste the pretty, my friend
Life is for living
Men are like trains....
Don't waste energy chasing after that one
Another one is coming.
A better one.
With seats.

Dance the nights away
Not like no-one's watching.
Dance like you deserve an audience.
Tonight, Matthew, I am Gaga.

Don't wish away your youth searching for stability,
Mediocrity and banality are nothing to be yearned for.

Don't stop moving.
A rolling stone has moss in every corner of the world
A friend on every continent
And a dress in every colour

Exploring the world is a means to exploring yourself
So read more books, eat more ice cream and don't waste the pretty.
Lost for words Nov 2009
Beautiful boy
Fairytale frog
Stupid girl
Like a loyal dog

A magic gem
that lost it's shine
It ceased to sparkle
When you weren't mine

A secret place
Too long lost
Heart of gold
Bitten by frost

A special love
that's disappeared
Now there's just me,
And hate, and fear

The star that shot
Left me here alone
With nothing else to do
But make my way home
Lost for words Nov 2009
Call a                          doctor/ plumber/ priest
My heart is               broken/ leaking/ deceased

My life is                   worthless/ so much better/ over
I'm going to              **** myself/ tell your wife/ Dover

How could you         leave me/ not know/ lie?
I hope you                return my stuff/ come back/ die

I'll never                   forget you/ forgive you/ go away
I need                        closure/ a DNA test/ to tell you I'm gay

Your                           face/ crotch/ top of your back
Is                                so beautiful/ lumpy/ unusually slack

Your                           ex/ mother/ best friend from school
Always made me      great coffee/ feel inadequate/ drool

I will                           miss you/ **** you/ stalk you forever
That way we can      be friends/ get away with it/ be together

I'm sorry                   you did this/ I did this /we failed
I promise to               pay you/ dye it back/ get you bailed
Please don't               leave me/ show the Polaroids/ write or call


(*delete as appropriate, just delete it all.....)
Lost for words Oct 2012
"Grief"
The label given to sorrow I cannot describe
The black cloud under which I hide
The sated reaper by my side

"Bereaved"
The name given to my new found state
The sadness still to raw to rate
When, too early, he became late

"Mourning"
The word given to the crushing despair
The dawn of darkness none can share
Which I can't believe is ever fair

"Loss"
The misnomer given for those now taken
Love and life already forsaken
The sleep from which he won't awaken.
For my wonderful, beautiful boy, who I think of every single day **
Lost for words Jul 2010
If the heart is just an *****,
Pumping blood for life
Why when I miss you
Does it cut me like a knife?

How can something functional
Become so emotional?
Turning from the physical
Into the devotional?

How can those ventricals
Seduced by psychology,
Override evolution
Defying biology?

The pain in my chest
Brings tears to my eyes
It appears cardiology
Is dependent on guys.
Lost for words Dec 2009
At a Parisean restaurant
In a quarter undisclosed
Unaware of everything
The diners sat exposed

As Clara and the Prince sat down
And prepared to eat their meal
Backstage the musician equipped himself
The theft who had yet to steal

As menus and music case opened
The scene was set for all
And as Rigo Jancsi took the stage
The crowd fell quiet, enthralled

The gyspy was a showman
His weapon a violin
A tune danced out across the room
As the strings began to sing

Playing notes of tales untold
His melody charmed her soul
The music pulled her heart to his
Over her husband's buttered roll

Captivated, entranced and mesmerised
Seduced by another life
And when the gypsy left that night
He took the Prince's wife

They ran away and married
A scandalous affair
Society was most surprised
But our story does not end there...

Hungarian tales tell of the man
Whose music stole a heart
Remembered in a chocolate cake
And puppets, songs and art

One hundred long years later
The guitar boy from the band
Strummed his notes and stole the girl
Heartstrings were played by hand

Two stories a century apart
What makes these stories the same?
Because the boy's band of musicians
Used the Hungarian gypsy's name
Lost for words Nov 2009
You said you knew the truth for me
And whispered it on the breeze
You opened up your heart to me
Then pushed me to my knees
You painted out a world for us
Full of sun and smiles
Then you put your words into reverse
and back-tracked several miles
You promised eternal friendship
Beyond all other ties
Your open mouth let snakes fall out
The serpents of your lies
I sent my dove over blackened seas
Olive branch in beak
You turned your back and walked away
So, which one of us is weak?
Lost for words May 2014
The goo-goo gaggle gobble grammar
New eggs standing in a roe
Alphabetting the Blurb is Cuckoo
School kid robots on the go
Fopdoodles questing for an ology
Dilly-dally on Patagonian trek
Mead-merry escalators of industry,
Or dudes who lakh in debt?
A billion ****** bridegrooms
In taffeta take-away
Cherry-picking for the species
From the matrix DNA
Muggles meet at midlife
For a Royal English tea
Swapping apps for homemade yogurt
Just a wee bit too PC
And so the dames riddle their speechcraft
On the doublespeak roundabout
Before Alzheimer's wicked edit
Skirts the bone-house bounders **out
This poem was written as an entry to a Telegraph newspaper competition: a poem of no more than 100 words which includes at least 25  from a list of 100 chronicling the history of the English language. The selected words are in bold. It didn't win :)
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/8824676/From-Riddle-to-Twittersphere-David-Crystal-tells-the-story-of-English-in-100-words.html
Lost for words Oct 2010
Incessent drumming and the roar of raindrops
Keep me from sleeping past dawn
Welly boots step into the cold, wet day
as the sky weeps for the loss of summer.
The wind takes the wheel,
driving water up trouser legs, into socks, under hats
Blown out beş lira umbrellas discarded on the overpass
A graveyard of useless metal spiders.
Still,
Still it rains
Impromptu lakes form from the spontaneous rivers flowing in every street
Bosphorus babies, cleansing the heart of the city
People look like street cats;
Soaked, preening, cowering under any shelter they can find
And still, Istanbul.
Still she rains.
Lost for words Nov 2009
Soozie Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
Everyday, just like the first day
A grand entrance, with lights and bubbles
Energetic enthusiasm - forget your troubles
She brings times that'll last forever
For a dumb blonde, surprisingly clever
A boundless youth that'll never grow old
One of a kind, broke the mould
Soozie Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday
Everyday should be her day
Lost for words Oct 2010
If the grass is always greener,
Stand on both sides of the fence
It's possible to play the field
while sitting on the bench
Jam all your grubby fingers
In each and every pie
Take the best of both worlds
And never study why
Don't agonise over choices
You can join and beat them
Stuff your greedy little face
Have your cakes and eat them
Don't win some, lose some
The winner takes it all
Use the rainy day one now
There's another in the hall
Pop an egg in every basket
Get more cooks on that broth
The more the ******* merrier
And I want the ******* lot.
Lost for words Nov 2009
You're not running through the airport
You're not dashing through the rain
Two weeks from now, I am sure
My life will be the same
You're not pledging to go with me
I didn't have you at hello
You're not waiting on my doorstep
Or finding me somewhere we know
You're not turning your car around
Or calling my name out in a crowd
You can't even realise you need me
Or say it to me out loud
You're not banging on the glass
Or writing me a song
It's f*cking hard to admit it
But I guess I had you wrong.
Lost for words Jan 2011
Didn't get the guy?
Don't get mad,
Get even.
Get up,
get out,
get well,
get fit,
get skinny,
get a job,
get in!
get better,
get a life,
get Carter,
get away,
get married,
just get over it already.
Lost for words Nov 2009
Fight Club kisses
Burn my lips
Purple blue fingers
Bruise my hips
Stolen intimacies
Stain my mind
Flashback images
Make me blind
The smell of ***
Hangs in the air
The taste of skin
And lime in hair
Forbidden ground
Now explored
All the rules
Just ignored
Curious hands
Have now discovered
Real motivations
Honestly uncovered
Satisfaction
of aims achieved
And the loss
Of misconceptions, relieved
Big fat secret
Marks my soul
Silent celebration
Of my match winning goal
Lost for words Nov 2017
For the times when you are weak,
When things are bad and looking bleak,
Know that I am by your side
To bear the things you can't abide
And every day I sit with you
Is another night you'll make it through
And every time I hold your hand,
I carry the pain you cannot stand

For the times when I feel weak,
When muscles ache and eyeballs leak,
I know that I am held aloft
By a hundred hearts and hands so soft
When everything seems to be going wrong
The love of friends will keep me strong
And whatever life throws we will take it
Because I know together we can make it
Lost for words Dec 2010
uh-oh
You're too slow
didn't even see where the red ones go
wasting your eyeline on waves and hares
but the animals only go in by pairs
keep it moving, don't be late
you can't hide when there's too much on your plate
sweating like a cheddar in the midday sun
thinking too much for anything to be done
time trickles through your fingers like a leaking tap
the tide waits for no man so mind the ****** gap
load it up, baby, pose and pout
shake that *** and move it out
dance with the devil, run with the wolves
pride is the sin of he who falls.
Lost for words Nov 2009
You need to stand
You're still looking
Trying to find
Yourself, your place.
These shoes don't fit
So be barefoot
Feel the grass
beneath your feet.
I am the grains
of sand, between your toes...
You need to run,
100 miles in a day
Towards a world
of possibilities.
We're drifting
In different seas
Our paths may cross
in time.

Hey!

Albert!

Good luck exploring the infinite abyss.
Lost for words Nov 2009
A library book
I need to read
A bad habit
I need to feed
A borrowed man
Who'll never be mine
Always on
Someone else's time
You always take
And never give
But you're a chapter
I need to live
I know I'll get hurt
I know it's wrong
But I wanted you
For oh so long
I can deal with
the degradation;
"I can resist anything,
except temptation."
Lost for words Nov 2009
It's in a box and under the bed
Written on my lips, inside my head
It's at the end of the Golden Mile
Behind the sofa, playing on my smile,
It's floating away on a spiral breeze
Sinking to the bottom of the seven seas
Buried in the sand, X marks the spot
of the ****** mystery's secret plot
Beneath the floorboards, in my shoe
In the attic and the cellar too
It's under the mattress - it was above
My secret, ****, shameful love
Trying not to place the blame
For the love that dare not speak its name
The cinema inside's the only place to go
And I know that you've seen the show.
Lost for words Jul 2010
Sensing the loss of you
Was hard, raw and angry
The realisation that you would not be mine
Stung like seawater
And howled like a foghorn
For months, seeing you cut like a knife
Hot, fat tears rolling down my cheeks
As I mourned the loss of your love.

Sensing the loss of us
Was slow, sad and silent
The realisation that I was over you
Crept like an ant up my leg
And whistled like the wind through a window
Now, seeing you is like pressing a bruise
Our conversations just a nostalgic echo
As I mourn the loss of my love.

— The End —