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3.8k · Apr 2018
Knowing
Undone Apr 2018
I walked to school today

Knowing I cried myself to sleep last night

Knowing no one knew

Knowing that was my power that I owned over everyone else
I don't want someone to save me, I want someone to hold me as I save myself.
2.1k · Aug 2018
How?
Undone Aug 2018
I sit and I think
Gazing out at the muted blueberry sky
Remembering all that lead me here
    All the hands that grabbed me
    All the tears into pillow cases
    All the unanswered prayers
Silently I laugh at the absurdity of it
I can’t help but find it amusing
How something like this could happen to someone like me
What a joke
What a life

I look up
Searching for god to pop up from behind the clouds and shout “April Fools!”
But I only find miles of smog
stretching over haunted childhood streets
With a smirk and a snicker
My eyes fall to the ground
I never thought this would be my life
At least it’s not boring
At least it’s something to write about
Lookin for an escape
1.8k · Jul 2018
I guess
Undone Jul 2018
I guess she was the one
And I was just for fun








I don’t blame you
I don’t want me either
I wish I was good enough
1.7k · Apr 2018
do me a favor.
Undone Apr 2018
This pounding in my chest
It hurts my love
It hurts so much

Because my mind well it's decaying
And what used to help has stopped
Everything has stopped

So I need you
I need you to do me a favor

Take my heart
And unravel the veins
Like you're untying your shoelaces
Then kiss me tenderly
Let me close my eyes
And weave flowers in my hair
(daisies if you can)
And tip the mortician so she does a good job on me

Then when my body turns cold
And my lips are sealed with glue
Just know in my final moments
I was thinking of you

So wipe away your tears and get rid of that frown
Cause baby I'll be happiest when I'm in the ground
It hurts
864 · Jun 2018
It hurts to watch you hurt
Undone Jun 2018
You’re crying right now
I’m not
And there’s nothing that hurts more
Than to know you’re hurting more than me
Just let me love away your sadness
At least let me try
Please let me try
662 · May 2018
Everyone
Undone May 2018
Everyone deserves love

Not everyone deserves your love
367 · May 2018
Dreaming #2
Undone May 2018
You dream of her
You dream of holding her
And loving her
Tight in your arms

But me
I dream of you

I dream of playing with your hair
Of clinging to your arms
Of making you smile
Of holding you tight
Of kissing your lips
Of fixing your collar
Of making you coffee
Of rubbing your back
Of taking your temperature
Of singing you songs
Of cooking you dinner
Of ticking your stomach
Of being your one

I dream of you
You dream of her
And I don’t wanna wake up
I want you. Could you learn to want me too?
296 · Jun 2018
Sunset
Undone Jun 2018
The clouds block the sunset
And I can’t help but think how fitting

(I view the holy light of your salvation from behind bars
And you, dangling the key, choose not to free me)

And now I watch this sunset
Speckled behind dark clouds
Desperately poking through to me
Because I guess god can’t cut me some slack and feed me the warmth I so desperately crave
Rather I must be teased by Mother Nature herself as she gives me just enough heat to keep me from freezing to death

The red glow is almost gone
It’s melting into that abyss
It’s falling off the edge of the earth
I can still see a sliver
I can still see it trying to break through
...
It’s gone now
It’s gone  
I’m staring at all the colors
All the remnants
All the pieces
All the gorgeous strokes of light that dapple the other wise pale sky
But the light is gone

The sun actually sets before we see it go down
The light refracts when the sun is below the horizon to give us the illusion it’s still shining bright
So when we watch it slip into the earth it’s already six feet under
Time blocks the sunset
And I can’t help but think how fitting
Feeling really ignored

I don’t like this poem to much but I felt like I had to post something.
295 · Oct 2018
Easy
Undone Oct 2018
It’s easy to give up
When there’s nothing left to fight for
Ready to give up
Ready to give in
269 · Apr 2018
Hey,
Undone Apr 2018
Its 3:47 in the morning
You're asleep
I'm in hell

I want you to know that if you want someone to love, I’m available. Because the second I saw you I fell in love with all that you are. But you talk like we’re friends, and talk is all that matters these days.

So if I can’t sing you to sleep at night
I hope whoever does has a prettier voice.
love lost
254 · May 2018
Tonight
Undone May 2018
Nights like these
By myself
Alone
At the mercy of the strangers around me
I weep for your arms
I want you to hold me
And protect me
And to lay my head against your chest
And have you sing away my fears
And kiss away my tears
And tell me everything is going to be okay
Cause baby I’m so sad
I’m so alone
I’m so in need of you
But you don’t deserve this
You don’t deserve me
You deserve someone who can lift you up
Not drag you down
And as much as I want you
As much as I want you to hold me
I’m too heavy for your arms
Im sorry
195 · Apr 2018
I stopped
Undone Apr 2018
I stopped taking my meds
They’re for people who are crazy
And even though I am crazy
I am no longer a person.
If you do take meds that doesn’t at all make you crazy, this is just how I feel about myself.
192 · Apr 2018
Want
Undone Apr 2018
I just want someone to look at me and think

"How precious."
I want you.
175 · Feb 26
leave me
Undone Feb 26
leave me where you found me

rotting among the flowers

the roses almost cover the stench

and if you squint
i'm almost pretty


the pink petals compliment my green skin
wish things could go back to the way they were
148 · Apr 2018
Daydream #1
Undone Apr 2018
My fingers
Tracing your arms
Climbing your skin
Finding your neck

Placing my ear
Against your chest
Hearing your heartbeat
Your warmth
Seeping into my smile

Peering up
To find your loving eyes
Waiting for me

You
Leaning down
Pressing your smile
Against mine
Most of the time when I use the word “you” well you know that I’m mostly singing about you!- car seat headrest

— The End —