I am betrayed by the agency of womanhood

a perennial lie; a shackle; a scythe

I am ‘want’ and I am 'pine’ and I am

most importantly, by myself


sisterhood, they cry sisterhood, and I am an echo

I am the clearest resolution

I am a hunting party

I am a dog at a tether; at a bone; at the point of a knife

my love becomes violent, because I torture what I do not understand

pockets filled with rocks and still she rises
absorbs sand through pinkish skin and still

she rises

january fire and a clean mother -
regret can't bury pets but can it bury

our clean mother?

in the place where women go to drown
i take myself there and lay her down

where was it that i saw a catfish hanging
drying

where was it that i dug beneath the silt and found
bones
rusted metal
broken glass

my memories are abscesses;
from what depths do they come?

my memories are experiments in rage,
salutations to the sun,
the axis of the earth                              and they

ground me,
lie for me
allow me to believe in resolution, restitution

other words beginning with r

your mother sleeps with arms outstretched,
tomorrow she'll take back what was hers

your sister waits in the marsh
and the leeches are calling her deeper

after all, didn't the apocalypse start in your back yard?
didn't hell reign on your house first?

if i had of known how far i would have to walk to find this
there's all the chance in hell that i'd be right back at the beginning,
sharpening my tools on upturned stones -
making excuses not to go

if i had of believed in the power of my own two hands
i don't think i would have ever gone looking
for somebody else to hold things for me,
as if it were unbearable to think myself whole

which night is best for burning?
how clean should my be skin be?

tell me how I fall apart at the bone
I'm interested to see how this plays out