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Liz Anne Mar 2012
As I lay dying
I can feel it all
Teeming fumes
Budding consumes
Children falling
{Now I'm flying}
Please don't
Let me touch
The moon
Liz Anne Dec 2011
If I showed you would you see
What lies inside a colored dream
Would you wonder as I do
And wander into a broken seam
And ponder how the fat bee flew
Far and wide I’m hopeless
Blanketed in blue
A shallow stream with floating cars
A moment too late
A chance taken too soon
I wonder if you’d find that true
Liz Anne Dec 2011
Puzzle pieces he used to fit
A lock and key that once were
As perfect for him as he for them

In the growing parts of her soul
She knows they’re no longer
All the things they used to be

Nothing left but days of old
Some days are peace and so past
Are those once pleasant circumstances

In each of their deepening hearts
There are mounting thoughts in the soul
Hoping and embracing the change
                                                        of tune
Liz Anne Jul 2012
I feel a storm in my gut
It tosses and tumbles and groans against the waves
Clouds kick and thrash without the wind
Rain thick and fierce flies up
Impossibly drawn to my voice, my foggy head
My hands tighten to hold back the thunder
And lightening, oh light stings my mouth and eyes
From icy toes a deep anger resonates
Rough soles flash fury and singe my ears
I will not be cruel, I have known heartache
What I give I have received
This rain is nothing to a crack in the sun
With my storm came hammer and chisel
And now, for what you make me break, ache
You’ve given me a dull rolling hate
Pulsing and breathless a torrent on my sea
Liz Anne Sep 2012
A stubborn stride takes her there
Dries her lips and pulls her hair
Skies smell of gasoline
Fading to tar
Asphalt and a broken down car
Rain on her flesh
Running circles around scars
Dirt thick as leather
Her foot is bleeding
She can feel each of your stares
Many things scare her
None she has chosen without care
In the way she moves
She feels a graceless wandering
A stumbling, tripping,
Lost-like confidence as though
She's only going the direction she'll go
Without purpose in one fell swoop
She's back again
She hasn't got a chance
She's yet to fall through
Here she found the rabbit hole
Here she found the ****** end
Then she saw the error of her ways
And he wouldn't let her in
She's got a little secret
If he can find her tell
She's floundering
In seas of green and callous red
Next time he sees her trip or finds her fall
She'll dare him to wait and see if she'll spin
Saying: "You just wait my friend
Here I aimlessly go again"
Liz Anne Feb 2014
Could you tell
rain
from glistening dew beneath
the shade of a
eucalyptus branch?
If you so chose
you could
listen
to me and close your soft eyes
and feel dew
like the difference
between you and me
and the dull
scent of the oncoming
rain
Liz Anne Mar 2012
Of late I've begun to see you're not quite who I thought you were
Perhaps you were cynical and more than a bit neurotic but I still thought you knew
The little secrets to life and love I had long since survived
The things you've said should have made me furious but all its done is help me realize
You are just as tainted by naivete and apathy as by the pretension I mistook for wisdom
My friend you upset me but you'll have to work much harder to make me hate you
And I care as I always have but if you'd like my trust and my friendship back
You'll have to work a whole lot harder than that
Liz Anne Sep 2012
If I gave you my memory
Would you find it odd
That I ask you to help me
Find all the details I lost?

But you weren't there
Sometimes I think
Neither was I
We'll find it anyway.

Is there a day in your past
You'd like me to see
Was it there before me
Or lost long after I left?

I suppose you must have
Stories you never told me
And I'm sure there are lies
We have both called true.

Have you an once
Or an inch I can have
If I had one would you
Let me give you mine?

I bet you still think this
Is all some bitter end
But I haven't left yet
And neither have you.
Liz Anne Dec 2011
It almost made me lonely yesterday
When you didn't call
It almost broke my heart today
When I found out you were kissing her

And I almost broke down
And I almost cried
And I almost thought it was

But then I realized
I was only
Almost in love
Liz Anne Oct 2011
I'm not sure what to say
When they're about to take it all away

Is it worse not knowing?
Than to calmly watch it come?

I can't yet cry for those we've yet to lose
Can I smile without causing, feeling pain?

Staring at the sun but it only hurts
When I look away

Is it so horrible to not want
To let my gaze
Stray?
Liz Anne Jul 2012
I like to keep the door open
To remember it’s there when I’m lonely

Late in the night I imagine what it would be like
If I took those first steps through

Just to pretend I know an impossibility
Leaning in close enough to see

Without ever leaving reality
But I won’t ever step a single foot through

Because I’m not always lonely
And you are never going to be there

At the start of every coming day
The only one I’m thinking about is me.
Liz Anne Dec 2011
Do you see it?

                                                                                                                                                                          It’s coming.

It’s just a glimmer now.

                                                                                                                                                        But it’s getting closer.

Here it comes.

                                                                                                                                                Straight from the horizon.

Faster, it’s getting faster.

                                                                                                                                                   And brighter, too bright.

Much louder now.

                                                                                                                                                   Must be a noisy coming.

It’s almost here.

                                                                                                                                                          Are you ready for it?

I don’t think I ever could be.

                                                                                                                                                                               Too late.

I know.

                                                                                                                                                                              -Because-

-Its-

                                                                                                                                                                             -Already-

                                                                                         HERE
Liz Anne Mar 2012
I know you're awake.
What are you doing?
Looking at the stars aren't you?

I know you wanted me to see them.
But I'm too tired to go out into the cold.
Would you tell me about them anyway?
I bet if I closed my eyes I could see them through your eyes.

Tell me.

Is Orion there?
He's my favorite you know.
He's strong.
Every time I see him his bow is drawn with purpose.
Even if the purpose is unbeknownst to me.
Can you see him?

And the moon.
Would you tell me about the moon?
I love her best.
Her light never burns or blinds.
She is kind.

Could you just whisper to me about the sky?
I want to fall asleep to the night and you.
Liz Anne Oct 2012
Something about the way you said it to me
Made me forget all the little in-betweens
And every moment that you missed
You haven't seen the things I hear
I don't want to touch
When I can feel
I've got skin-like scales
I'll cut you with burnished claws
If you'd said something else I'd regret
But I've yet to taste the melody of scorn
I'm deaf and out of touch but you can't see
Liz Anne Mar 2012
Tonight I'd tell you
If you only wanted to know
I'm afraid you won't ask
Because its already hard
To let go
But I wish you would
Tonight you could tell me
If only you wanted to
I wait to hear your answer
To a question I can't ask
Tonight is just a moment
I won't think about tomorrow
If I could only let you know
Liz Anne Mar 2012
With a thousand words he told me he loved me
~
That's alright, I told him, the sun never shines when I am looking
~
I wish I could tell him when the floods come screaming in
~
But I know it would only wash away his idle smiles sooner
~
There are days when shooting stars reign and blue breezes blow troubles from my hair
~
Moments pass where everything I want glides the tune on his lips
~
I remember the copper warmth of heart that led me here with him
~
And yet I can never keep hold of the feeling's sandy kite strings
~
It will come, they told me, give him the chance and Spring's love will blossom
~
So far as I sadly see now April's dewy romances are all that call me near
~
His gold-freckled eyes ask to know my soul and make me wish I had—
~
Make me wish I could honestly repay a thousand well-wandered words
Liz Anne Oct 2011
Today I peeled back your skin
And stepped in
I stretched your fingers like
New leather gloves
Wiggled your toes in dew-stained grass
Then opened your eyes
But I couldn't see the beauty in
The life surrounding you
Flowers were objects and pets accessories
I listened for the gentle hum of bees but
All I heard was your breath
In
Out
In
Out
Pause
For a moment I stopped you from
Breathing
Just to bring the beauty back
To me
All the same it was gone and you
Were turning blue
I let go and ran out
Away from your shoes
Liz Anne Jun 2012
My soul shakes and I feel that ancient rage
It breathes in and out of my lungs
Flowing like the slight breath of smoke
After the first taste of ecstasy
Rage is not black or darkly brooding
Broken and full it burns in my veins
Fought and forced and drawn upon
Like some frigid barefoot army
Strong as I am I wouldn't and couldn't be
If not for the rage that feeds the battle cry
Ragged are the edges of my heart
Wounded, scarred, stitched and ******
All the ties that make me strong burn me
Each strength I gain I lose a little
Thick and festering I feel it flare
Scorched are the remains of what I became
Every scabbing wound you left on me
In my rage is hate, yellow as drowning green
In my rage is strength, slick as steel fencing
In my rage is love, brutal as searing live wood
Liz Anne Jun 2014
gravel under my toes and the ache
or road-burned soles
lilies of the valley are the picture
of any purity
I have ever seen
but I've been a nocturnal blossom
whose weakness
is wanting a pretty reflection
of overwhelming sun
and the truth is mud is a second
skin like lovéd dirt
caked into my own blemished flesh
rough hands made busy
I'm a distraction from my own quiet lips
bare feet in the garden
grass in my hair
I wanted grain because sustenance
always meant something more
than dirt-born ideal
but instead I've planted pretty things and ran
to the center of the road
where I'm making my sunburned stand
as cars rush angrily by
I'm not asking which way home
all I want to know is how long
and how far I have to be
before I can finally build something
only for me
Be
Liz Anne Sep 2011
Be
If you can hear me
I am waiting
Pen in hand
Hope in heart
When I am near
You run far
I can't hold the hand
Of one so lost
Help me understand
My shoulder
For your tears
If you'd say
I'd hear you
And we could be
And let the world
Be
Liz Anne Mar 2015
Independent of my thoughts
I have every inclination
to find a setting
sun whose
Love
is only split
by the violent
edge of a mutable
and moving horizon line.
Liz Anne Dec 2012
A glass of fabric softener to begin the evening
Followed by a sick-scented bleach chaser

Just another Facebook fascination
A text or two to say goodbye or *******

What's the honest response to hearing the lost?
To knowing a scream when you see it in the silence?
When the distance is ever-wide between the two?

Each of us is living in a world where bleach cost money
But laundry and loneliness have always been free
Liz Anne Oct 2012
Milwaukee never saw me coming
In all my grey-eyed mistakes
But neither did Paris
And I arrived there without
A sense of falling, foolish place

I wish there was gum on my shoe
I'd hoped the Frenchmen would be mean
It's all mixed up, I got it all upside-down
Please don't ever ask the men of Milwaukee
Not all of them can actually sing

He toasted the world's greatest painters
I let him call me his own dying art
City of Light, I'll take my leave
When he didn't find a note I'd like to think
The champagne glass in hand heard him weep

Bearskin rugs and wide-brimmed hats
I never gave my head, the time of day to ask
Sorry I can't take it back, whatever you see in me
I'm afraid I can't say another word
Or you'll see I'm inevitably green
Liz Anne Jan 2013
Lag feels more like laaaaaag
When I'm killing time

It's a waste to spend days waiting
To learn a trade or two
That can only maybe help you

Movies and TV shows
My music is always going going going
Until the battery is dead and gone

Diet coke and french toast
Sickeningly sweet
I've yet to take a bite

Wasting time dreaming
My plans are rotting and drifting

Must do what I have to
Have to learn while I can

Striving and driving into whithered suns

Funy how they all demand
This is how it must be done

But after they lose it they'll say
All they want is to have a little
Youth back to do

Everything they say the young
Are still too young to do
Liz Anne Jan 2012
When I met you you were crying
Somebody did you wrong
Your face was a fish
A red, bloated fish
And it made me a little sad
To see the fat fish in your eyes
I gave you a crumpled tissue and tried
To make you smile again
Then, my friend, you were laughing
Cheerful as a fluttering lark
But they said you were cruel
And I'd never have known
Except now you've gone
And done somebody wrong
If I was her I might have cried
So no, you are not a fish or a lark
More like a dog
But the greatest consolation I have
Is knowing Karma has found you
And She's a bigger ***** than even you
Liz Anne Jun 2014
Like a bird on a buoy
there's a lot of wasted space
between me
and where I want to be.

The shore never looked as good
as when I couldn't see it anymore
but I'm too busy dreaming
about what's on the far side
of this divide to notice
I'm slipping away with the tide.

I'm singing my song far from the dry
river beds and nests in the sand
and not a soul can see my feathers
ruffle in the breeze.

I wouldn't have it any other way
because I'm finally far enough
away you can't see my colors
and think that's all I meant to be.
Liz Anne Jan 2014
Would you
lend me the last few
dregs
of your aging green
tea? And would you
mind if all I
kept
was their taste on my
tongue? If you want them
back
I've got their memory
but kiss me
fast.
This dusky memory won't
last.
Liz Anne Apr 2012
Ain't no love
Ain't no sun
Since my lover's gone
Only black skies remain
Under new blue
They tell me
I'll find a good love
Kind and loyal love
But they don't
Oh no they don't know
Ain't no love
Ain't no sun
Since my baby's gone away

I ain't gonna wait up
No I ain't gonna stay up
'cause he turned all the lights off
When he left that day

~

And since that day
Only black skies
Cold lifeless black skies
Come my way
I picture a bluesy crooner singing this in a 1920s speak-easy . . .
Liz Anne Dec 2013
There isn't a more pleasant way
to burn through my
color-soaked retinas than to look
long into the setting sun hoping to see
something of you
and find instead the
missing
parts of me
Liz Anne Apr 2014
Silken pigment catching the wind
pulling like feathers plucked
from grey butterfly wings

I've seen the worst of you

like a hemorrhage
brought to just below the skin
your wings have holes
from all the small places
you've pushed your way into

looking for flowers
where the sun couldn't reach

with the slightest icy change
in the breeze you did your best
to color yourself

darker than you ever had to be

and I held back your hair
delicate and falling
while you did your worst

you bleed any way you can

I see you wishing it would all
circle the drain and bring you
to the blossoms you can't find
but you won't listen when I say

they're not there and they'll never be

you can't hear me while your wings
are scraping away
and I did my best to say
the only flowers worth your time
are the sun soaked ones
you knowingly leave behind

I was there before I knew
so much of your life
you'd make ****** and grey

and I stayed

but I've more than found my way
without you or either of them

now I think I'll let you crawl
when you could have flown
after so long trying to keep you
from that narrow hole
maybe you will finally fall
and be free of this

other woman

you should have called friend
Liz Anne Jan 2014
Orange blossoms on candy apple trees; nonsense never mattered much to me. Do you feel snakes in your toes like a curse on your modesty? Speak up and out! I doubt you realize how different those two things can be. "Shake dreams from your hair, my pretty child" and forgive me now for dawn is the least of all I've wasted. I don't much care if you mind that I'll be growing figs where you always hoped I'd plant pine trees. Then I suppose if you really did feel the same curse that I have, our torn-rooted feet would have hissed and begged for a bit more thistle and violets instead. Do not mistake pointed words for silence; I know hope and color beyond reason. I miss mud in my hands and the blades of broken grass lying flush with the skin of my ankles. Loneliness is a lack of wind but bitterness is wind-blown grit in my teeth; I will never say I do not love them both. It's easy to miss the burn of coastal sun and forget the feel of sand under your fingernails. I have fought when it was not asked of me and I have been calm when I should have thrown a punch. Still you ask sharp pine of me when all I hope to grow is the soft wide leaves of fig trees. Don't look for anything but nonsense, because after the orange blossoms wilt I will caress tender leaves and watch blue Cuckoo birds carry away my ill-planted figs.
Liz Anne Jan 2014
Turning circles and dancing
on blue depression glass
rosettes under my toes will never wilt
they'll never fall, never fade
never bloom

I'm turning circles and turning
back around to the last place
                    I saw you
the wind in my hair will be the same
every sight and sound the way I left it

But I'll turn circles and hear
all the chinks and tings of my miss-stepping feet
caught on the echo of your absence
and falling gracelessly over the cut-glass of cold blue rosettes
Liz Anne Feb 2012
An angry sun setting
Once saw me smile
And burned a blue hole
In my every sight
And every now and again
I find myself wishing
I could smolder too

Trees often elude me
When I most want to hear
The sway of branches
And the grace of leaves

Concrete is most cracked
When I crave something
Solid under unsteady feet

And some electric nights
My moons are serene
But mostly the little stars
Remain unspoken and unseen

Closing my worn and wary eyes
Makes it hard to feel
Dew and troubles anew
But even then I can find
That little blue hole
Pulsing fiercely in time
With the back of my mind
Liz Anne Dec 2011
Sometimes when I am driving I pretend they are after me.
Anyone going the opposite direction is an innocent, oblivious passer-by; they can't know that I’m on the run. It would foil the plan. Those behind me are the enemy. They hope to quietly apprehend me before I reach the state line. I floor it going uphill. I turn the corner at the stop sign. For a moment I've lost them, out of view. I slow a bit, enjoying the few seconds of a victory drive. Then, suddenly, there! In my rear view mirror there's another one! I reach over and turn up the radio, just a notch, and smile. I am Bonnie minus Clyde.
And they are never going to catch me.
Liz Anne Jul 2012
There's a boy in my hometown
He loves me more than anyone
Said he'd wait until the end of time
But his is the love of a child' s memory
And he can't catch one wild as me
He says he just wants a simple kiss
A quiet afternoon in the same old place
And he doesn't understand why
I spend so long starring at the moon
Or why I'll always turn and run
When we talk he says he's good
And I know all he says is true
The things he says are blatant casualty
He is steadfast and I am distant
His word is honest, he smiles carefully
But I won't be rescued or protected
I know he won't stop chasing after me
And I know I break him a little more
Each time I reach out to lock the door
But I can't help if I don't feel
Everything he swears is real
I can make him smile if I look too long
My words can hurt and heal, I know
He is young in so much younger than I
But I am long gone much too high
And all the things I crave fall to me
When I am alone and untamed
In that moment he can't see in me
Where reality collapses on fantasy
I leave him his bewildered smile
My head and heart run far and further
It's everything I ever wanted
But it's everything I want alone
So I smile and again I'll leave him
To the innocent love he'll give
There's a boy in my hometown
Who loves me longer still
After I've secretly found the freedom
He never thought was worth finding
All this he can't see inside of me
Liz Anne Mar 2012
It’s not about you and it never was.
You are the ring of wax the candle left behind
When I switched to China rain incense.
Your words were a kind melody
I once danced to; now I smile.
Kindness is a virtue best appreciated
By the receiver and I am tired of giving.
Love is the thought that won't cut my mind
Or mend my fractured soul.
I do not mind having a splintered past
But I'd much rather be alone than mean.
And I would be mean, love without peace,
Leave me with my braids and beads,
All those fraying leather seams.
Bet you couldn't see my melancholy
I bet you think I'm lying, you think I'm scared.
You think you know me, sorry,
Not even that is true.
The girl you met could've been ensnared
She lit candles and didn't care.
Wax only burns the moment it touches skin
Flame can't last longer than the wick.
There's a spirit inside me now and she,
I, am very brave if sometimes icy.
So leave the ones you won't know
Forget the ones you don't know.
No person is what they seem
Or who they seem to love.
Not all wise men prosper
Nor is all bravery kind.
Perhaps the wisest
The bravest thing
For me to do
Is to be sour
Is to be mean.
Liz Anne Feb 2012
Can you see me?
Gazing up from the ground?
I'm still breathing.
Every breath is harder.
Than the last.
But I'm not stopping now.
Not anytime soon.
My hope is louder.
Than the blows you throw.
A heart can fracture.
It can even break.
But breath keeps breathing.
Long enough to heal.
Liz Anne Dec 2011
My knuckles sting
From an icy gust of lovers lost

Calloused are my palms
That gave up their soft beauty
To a beautifully temporary green

Nails short or jagged
Sometimes they cut and bleed
A snag between your skin and mine
Not all of my ventures bring me peace

Small and stubby fingers
Thin bones just below the skin
Overused muscles and tight tendons
My hands are ugly and they often ache
They are broken --but they serve me well.
Liz Anne May 2014
My mind is clear
finally
for the first time
in a long time
and I see the light
break on the rim
of the crystalline
glass I mistakenly
thought I had to keep
sheltered
to keep my happiness
unbroken.
Liz Anne Sep 2011
Here it is and there it goes
Like sand through my fingers it slides
Smooth and untouchable gleaming
A flickering flame it leaps
In and out of my grasp
One blink and its gone away
Until I wonder if it ever was
Then it lands subtle as a butterfly
On my open palm
Liz Anne Dec 2011
The most beautiful clouds are those just before the storm

Peaceful are the tears that fall before the sky breaks

Troubles on the horiz' seem large and forever reaching

Doubtful are the smiles soon to part after the peaceful dark

Black shadows keep sunlight and blue from breaking through

Waiting hearts and hopeful parts find stillness in the sky

They'll search for the calm before the coming pass

Chaplin's words ring true for those who refuse to let fear in

In the placid moment before the storm effervescent hearts

Hold to the knowing hope that beyond the dark there is

A waiting light
Liz Anne Jan 2014
She grew soft flowers,
back when her hands were small,
with narrow stems and crisp scalloped petals.
She grew them without dirt
or water, holding them so
carefully
it was as if she was feeding them
air. She found in them
beauty, she found
in them hope, as much as
all the quiet things she most wanted to be. But
no one told her and she learned
quickly
what no one would say. As the years went
by the stems grew meek
and the once bright
petals began to steadily fade.
She knew no better, no other, way.
It came like a blow to her gut when she
was finally forced to say
her flowers were paper.
Not meant to last. Not meant to stay.
Not meant to be anything but a
momentary breeze. They did not tell her
beauty is destined to pass. They
wouldn't say not everyone is wise
enough to take
the hope they're given and
run.
She decided then
what she would not be. Not flowers
of tissue with pipe cleaner leaves but something
far distant from these false
house plants. She would seize hope
and with it she'd run, until
she grew branches and roots meant to be torn loose.
Be they paper or petals, she could
no longer grow flowers, but at least,
what she discovered in her now
tumbleweed garden is that at least you can
see a tumbleweed take
to the breeze before its last
breath of shame and regret. After all
sometimes hope for a future beyond, is all you get.
Liz Anne Oct 2012
Will you not?                                                                                  
Weigh my soul?                            
                                 As I have sought?
                                                                                           To cradle yours?
Liz Anne Jan 2013
On the last overpass
Before the outlet malls
Sits a park green with trees
A little oasis before
Altered desert sands
One bush bright with weeds
Pulls its arms in and through
Gaps in chipped olive chainlink
Flailing in the vicious
Car-spun winds beneath
The brambles on the inside
Long to fly without dirt underfoot
The knarlled flowers on the outside
Wish they had the shade
And cool company of trees
But of the branches flowing
In and out of the in-between
I can't say if they want for
Anything but stability
Liz Anne Aug 2014
The fine fine
fine
wrinkle of your lips reflected
refracted
in the passing light
sight
of a carside window pane
pain
in the heat of a copper glowing
growing
like fruit after the flower dies
cries
in the narrow cave of your eyes.
Liz Anne Nov 2011
The things I can do
And those I cannot
Don't seem so far away
Perhaps I am
Only
That
     Which I can
              And cannot
                    Cease to do
Liz Anne Nov 2012
Rain falling
Like a long ago lover
I ran from
In favor of deeper
Grey earth valleys
And air dully filled
With the scent of
Warm wet concrete

If he was new
I'm an old, old soul

This one is another
Dripping face under an eave
I prefer to be
Where I can feel
Cool winter pain

"Mind if I?"

"I didn't know
You smoked."

"I don't."

But

Marlboro

Reminds me
Something of home.
Liz Anne Dec 2011
Snow glows like moonlit tears.

Smoke halos caress wild children.

I often think the moon glows with a serpentine smile.

Only savages live with vacant securities.

Dust cloud angels stain the frozen melodies.

If they invited you in could you risk losing the day?

Wander Haight and squander your fixes.

Haloed sinners purge peace from smoke and snow.

How now, dear friend, are your rich man's worries?

Toil relieves turmoil when smoke and song share.

Demons and devils to the ordinary man's struggles.

Only angels share fumes and folly to give us spring's bloom.


Not every able young man will last the winter.
Liz Anne Sep 2011
Changing skins
She slips through a crack in the sidewalk
A rusted soul floundering for air
New life she thought
But old frustrations burst like so many balloons
And again she'll shed because from this skin
She can see only concrete
Liz Anne Feb 2012
Welcome one and all to baggage claim
Whether you are here for the first time
Or struggling with the last
It is clear your insecurities did not fit in the overhead bin
That half stick of deodorant your self-deprivation would not let you leave behind
And the little bag of "just in case" paranoia won't let you escape
Are all here nestled between your socks
And if you don't see them here take it as a threat
You'll have another case waiting for you at the gate
So enjoy your time, don't spare a dime
In a little while we'll all be here once again
Please don't bother checking in
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