I'm locked in my own prison.
Stay away.
I cause myself and everyone else so much pain.
Habits need breaking,
Emotions I've been faking.
You will never really know it's me.
Because my body has me trapped.
And I will never be free.

What happened is
you needed me,
and I did not

To  have life
you need to want it
as you want air
beneath the surface.

For Jan*

as
a breath will happen by itself
as
water will find the way to flow
as
gravity will hold us to the ground

I will love you always
and this will be as
natural

I wonder why
I somber cry

Forget me, I'm forgotten

I wish people could see
I wish I could say
There's a mess in my mind
Something's wrong with my Brain

You can't give love
only to take it back
but I swallow words
like pills these days

and the side affects
have no warning label
and overdosing is
too often fatal