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LH2012 May 2012
Deep green eyes
Dark wavy hair
Small and hidden
Till November hits

You don't see her now
You know nothing of her
But to me she is everything
She's our flesh and blood

Carried so safe
Inside of me
You'll see the evidence
And no one believes

Your mom and dad both
Will throw a big fit
My mom will go off
In a raging kick

But still she is here
tucked away deep inside
She moves and kicks
Not much room to abide

The getting out
Will be later
She needs to grow
Into the world

You don't want her now
Only want her gone
She wants to stay
Inside of me

You will warm up
To the reality of her
You will want her back
If you dispose of her

So back me up now
Don't try to pursuade
Me to **** my baby
Shes vulnerable now

You will regret it
So don't push me to it
I will do anything
to protect my treasure

It is wrong and bad
It should be illegal
so back off our girl
She's safe In me

I know you love me
you will love her too
Give us a chance
To be part of you
©LH2012
LH2012 Jul 2015
The bruise you left upon my breast deep beneath my pallor skin,
Always crawling deep within this living corpse of a body.
The quick connect between the flesh.
Crimson color fills the canvas each slam pooling it deeper.
Windpipe restricted, held and released, gasping for air in a flush of pleasure.
Pull you in deeper begging for more, I get propelled to the floor.
Pressured down and turned around I get the brunt of your force.
The aftermath is purple and blue yet I keep coming back for more.
Its never enough just the once, I'm always aching for further abuse.
LH2012 Jan 2012
You dont hear me
I make sure of that.
But how could you
You don't blink an eye

You call me all slurred
Baiting me in with adoration
then something in your head clicks
That switch is hit

You go off in a rage
Bringing up the past.
I don't know why
And you don't know I cry

I'm not perfect
You should know
But I try my hardest
To get as close as I can

I have regrets
I ****** up I know
But I cant make it better
When you wont let it go

You hold onto the grudge
You choke my soul
It hurts on the inside
But you don't know

Its like I do it all wrong
And your a perfect angel
There's no stop and no time
That i can recover before the next

You act abusive in words
Cutting straight to my soul
No stop no pause
Just words that keep rolling

You don't remember
What u said in the morning
No glance at what words
Break me down and **** me

I wish you could see
The hurt I endure
When ever you call me
In a drunken stupor

But u never will.
I make sure of that
I silence my sobs
Till your passed out

So I continue the mask
Of feelings you don't know
So that you wont see
What you do to me.
©LH2012
LH2012 Apr 2012
Water to ice
Coals to fire
It goes from one
Straight to the other

One gets colder
The other hotter
As soon as it hits
The temperate range

Its like us
At first crazy hot
Then with no warning
Goes straight to ice

We get into fights
We settle our squalls
I always give in
You never relent

Your like the ice
Cold and unchanging
I'm like fire
always glowing hot

Why we cant comprimise
I'll never understand
We just keep fighting
And never let up

There is no comprimise
for the soul of discontent
the fighting continues
Week after week

I try not to let
It affect other parts
But its not just one
But a whole with you

I cant figure it out
It never stays the same
Its always something
Not ever nothing

So I have to decide
I have to choose
Its you or myself
Because this is a zoo

It ***** beyond compare
so at this I will hault
I just cant keep hiding
the pain from your eyes.
©LH2012
LH2012 Mar 2014
What am I to you?
You go against everything you say to me.
You say I’m perfect,  
You say you love me,
You go back and I do all wrong.
By all means, that’s fine.
But your tact, you lack.
You voice you want me to stay,
Don’t want me to disappear
But your actions and tone,
The body says go.
You push me away,
Yet beg me to stay.
I’m tied in knots trying to keep up
This constant turmoil makes me sick.
Over and under, around then back,
The obstacle course is ridiculous,
Near impossible to navigate.
I need a map, an autopilot to get me home
But that used to be you,
You used to be there, catch me if I fall.
Kept me from tears, being that safe haven I needed.
And yet here we are, pure turmoil.
We should have never argued.
It would have been simple.
All good things come to an end,
Some clean, some a wreck.
Stumbling into the wreck
You claim you love me and will ne’er leave.
Contrary you push me to go.
So decide your stand.
You don’t get both, choose
It’s me…
Or I’m gone.
©LH2012
LH2012 May 2010
impartial to war
i try to keep peace
motives still alive
i will survive

enemies don't help
as hard as they try
the sky is dark
clouds heavy tonight

i run like the wind
war close at hand
to escape from the wrath
i need to defend

i fight for the truth
keep safe all in sight
my entorage close
i leap for the fight

spreading so far
we fight in disperse
i'm running in anger
down mountains of bone

blood flowing thick
i hold nothing back
the full blow of fury
headed straight for the top

in mud caked clothes
the blood is stained thick
a sword in my right hand
dagger at left

archers fire in anger
i dodge behind rocks
they hit me in double
i ignore the shock

running now screaming
the serpent sees me
i spring for the ****
blade ready to run through

sword clashes ring
across hills and valleys
we stop in horror
a moment of silence

then blood all about
we challange each other
winner shall live
do as they wish

the looser will die
in bad honor at that
they die cold and still
on flat rocks of stone

clinking at first
we warm up the tension
the swords are flying
death drawing us in

the skill is high
you can't see it all
a blade here now
in one second gone

keep your eyes keen
to see the quick end
shoulder, leg, arm
slices death blowing

still not over
we fight until finaly
i stab the heart
his face melts in death

the fight below
turns into fleeing
we won the war
all tired and steaming

the casualty rate
is high on our side
2000 souls gone
of my 5000 here

the saddness goes on
never to end
home bound we go
leaving all wrath behind

home once at last
good conquered evil
we went for a fight
came back with no evil
©LH2012
LH2012 Oct 2013
Water to ice
Coals to fire
It goes from one
Straight to the other

One gets colder
The other hotter
As soon as it hits
The turning point.

At first it’s real hot
Then it turns icy
No indication of when

We get into fights
We settle our squalls
I always give in,
You never relent.

You’re like the ice
Cold and unchanging
I’m like the fire
Always getting hotter

Why we can’t compromise
I’ll never understand
We just keep fighting
Never letting up
There is no compromise
For the soul of discontent
The fighting continues
Week after week

I try not to let it
Affect all other parts
But it’s not just one thing  
It’s a whole with you

I can’t figure it out
It never stays the same
It’s always something
Not ever nothing

So I have to decide
I have to choose
It’s you or myself
Because this is a zoo
©LH2012
LH2012 Jan 2014
It cuts like a knife
Knowing you’re gone from me
I hate the fact
That we had to go thru like this

It’s not fair to us
Nor to anyone else
We fit perfect
Just like a glove

All I wanted was to hold you close
Just feel you breathe
And before we got the chance
We had to stop

It pulls me in two
The idea that the late nights
Are gone for good
I can’t stand that silence

You’re gone from me…
That’s all there is to it
I have to accept it
But I don’t want to

It hurts you too
Probably more than I know
But I don’t want to go
I want to stay here with you

I put my music on repeat
Just listening to you sing
That same old cover
Burning straight to my soul

Ripping my heart
Straight into pieces
I feel it shatter
Hear it hit the ground hard

My entire body aches for you
The void is where you were
And won’t be any longer
And I hate it

I just want you back
I want those calls
I need that security

I just don’t like it
No
I hate it
I hate it all

I miss you baby
That’s never going to change
I’m always going to love you
That’s never going to leave
©LH2012
LH2012 Jan 2014
It wasn’t long before I knew
He wouldn’t stop and stare
he would take your breath away
His gaze would go through you
Straight to your soul
Like it was connected to you in a way that
Nobody could control if they tried
He wasn’t after anything in particular
Just someone to hold
Someone to love him
He needed a hand, just an offer
Say you’ll be there for him
Actually follow through
Don’t leave him there all alone
You’ve been there, that’s been you in his shoes
You know how it feels to be hurt
Abandoned by all, hope and trust demolished
You had no one to bring you back in
So don’t shut down, open your arms
Feel it with your soul
Everything in you should be open to him
He’s just like you on the inside
Hurting, lost, abandoned…
Be who you needed someone to be for you
That one person you didn’t have
Be his hope, his sun in the darkest of nights
Don’t run. This isn’t about you. It’s about him
Be selfless. He needs you to be there
And God knows you need him too
©LH2012
LH2012 May 2012
It's a love hate
Crazy kinda thing
Love you like crazy
Hate your decisions

You are amazing
Sharp as a tack
Cuddly as a kitten
And full of surprises

But you choose so crazy
Hunting on holidays
Missing family events
Disappearing mysteriously

You run to Ozona
Just for a buck
You come home all mopey
Cause you missed me alot

Once and a while
that's fine with me
But give me a chance
To get us in too

Its love hate
I love you I hate them
They pull us apart
From where we are

They try to divide us
So we fight a lot
You pick them
Over me

I thought I was with you
Not all of them
They push me out
And you don't care

There's too many battles
That rage in your head
Me or them
Choose? I wont make you

Trust issues
Even abandonment
scar your insides
So you constantly hurt

I'm not her though
I won't go
I stay till you say
To go far away

You don't believe
Trust is hard
Keep me in mind
See how it goes

I back you up
No matter what
I don't question you
Like you interrogate me

So its still love hate
I love you yes
But I hats the way
That everything else is first.
©LH2012
LH2012 Dec 2016
Your the ******* worst sometimes.
If you want a family you shouldn't have started your career. You can't have both.
******* ****
*****.
*****
I wish I'd never met you
Why am I still here. You don't care.
All you do is lie to me. Get my hopes up and crush them.
I wish you'd die.
You're just like the others.
All you do is hurt me

Stop. Ignore.
Remove the negative from those who can't see.

You are beautiful.
You are kind.
Your love is deep and strong.
You don't put up with ****.
Head up.
Tears gone.
You are the best you can be.
Perfection
LH2012 May 2014
****** it up.
I’ve done it again
I went against what I said
I put myself first

You don’t deserve this
Nobody deserves this
I feel nothing desirable
You shouldn’t love me

For some crazy reason
You do still love me
I can’t figure out why
But I know that you do

You show it in everything
You give me pieces of you
That no one else will ever see

I was your wild card
Your crazy out there jump
You weren’t going to go for it
And I pushed and you did

Then I ****** it up
I went behind you
I didn’t think
I put me out there first

You had hurt me
But I hurt you more
It wasn’t intentional
Now its remorse

Why do I keep doing this
I always fall back
There’s no escape for me
It’s always a **** up

I’m good at those
I ruin every good thing
Like tornadoes in Oklahoma
There’s nothing but destruction in my wake

I feel sorry for the guys
The ones that deal with this
People I hurt
People that trusted me
I can’t keep doing this
It pains you and I know it

We’re never going to get back
It will never be normal
I ****** it all up
It’s going to never go away.

I’m sorry I loved you
I’m sorry you trusted me
Take a hint, it doesn’t get better
It will only get worse

It’s just how I am
That’s all there is to it
I’m good at ******* it up
******* people over

I loathe that I do it
But it’s just how I am
Leave while you can
Before I **** us over worse
©LH2012
LH2012 Jan 2014
How will I get home from here?
Back to my sweet serenity I love so much
Where does this stop
Is there an end??
I feel like I’m falling down a spiraling shaft
Plummeting to my death in the rocks below
There’s no fix for this, at least it doesn’t feel like it…
I need a hand, a strong place to be
I need that glimmer of hope
And out of nowhere…. I see it
Tall, dark, and handsome just jumps in and saves me
The spinning subsides; I can see walls and clear shapes
He’s there and waiting- holding my hand till my head clears
The dust settles, he pulls me in
That warm embrace is all I feel
A soft landing I’m looking for
All the searching, all the heartache
It can all stop now; I’ve got my safe haven
My beach in a snowstorm, the moon in the dark night sky
My strong tower that keeps me going
Protecting me from the woes of evil
Pushing me forward- urging me to continue
I feel safe and happy
I can relax, all is well, the spinning is over
Forever more I can breathe
©LH2012
LH2012 May 2012
The sky may be dark
The battle is long
Screams pull you down
Slow you to a hault

You may want to continue
Or just stop where you are
But someone needs you
To get up and start

Shes small and beautiful
Looks just like you
Green eyes of wonder
Curls all a mess

She watches you closely
Holding tight to the thought
That you will love her one day
As much as her mom

She's quiet and calm
Until she gets mad
A firecracker pop
With a fuse to be lit

No dolls or tea sets
Bows and ruffles are gone
She plays in the mud
And stays ***** not clean

She watches you
And you don't know
She loves you more
Than the ocean and shore

She wants to go with you
To fight the odds
She wants to help
You pull our side

She's staying home
To keep safe her life
Your battle with them
Would end her

So dont forget her
Even if you don't love her
She loves you
No matter what you do
©LH2012
LH2012 Jan 2012
I feel like I'm sleeping.
Never awake to handle the shock
Just riding with the flow,
Seems to never slow

Its like there's a substance
I have yet to encounter
If I go on without it
I might not survive.

Even the feeling of missing
something so important to human life,
makes me feel So full
, why? ...I don't know

I cant live with you
But without you
I will die violently
If you don't stay

Its the addiction
I know not of
The heroine to
my system of needing

Annihilate my insides
Twist my thoughts
Killing me slowly
You never hint a clue.

My heartbeat slows
my head starts to spin
I lose my speach
and cant find my legs

You make me dependant
Honing down on my thoughts
Consciousness is gone
Now Its up to you

You have the choice
pull the plug
or keep me alive
Just heads or tails to you

You act like you need me
you even say you do
But love? I feel none
Just the want of it.

You pull Me in close
only for one thing
casting me aside
Once you get what you want

Just like the rest
It feels like you are
They say you are but
You insist not

I try to decipher
who to believe
But I can't
You stole the ability

Do this and do that
Notes of discomfort
**** me slowly
Because of your problems

At times I am scared
Of what you may do
I walk on glass egg shells
Trying to please you

One day it may click
that I will want more
But until I get there
Your keeping score.

We fight and we scream
worry about all
there is no love
Only a lack there of

It ***** all alone
with no one beside
You keep to yourself
leaving me blind

So bring the consciousness
Don't just leave me
wake me up
before I die

I want us to live
I want a family
So keep me to love
Not to neglect.
©LH2012
You
LH2012 May 2016
You
Why aren't you better.
Why do you ****.
You said you were going to be a good wife.
Yet here you are.
Ruining the good.
Flawed as you can be.
He doesn't want you anymore
But he's not going to say it.
You share the same bed
The house is both of yours
Yet you never see each other
When you do it's not sweet
There's no cuddles
There's no couple
There's you
And there's him
Why do you do this
Why do you ****
It's not anything he did
It's you.
Bad luck.
©LH2012
LH2012 May 2012
You say you love me
You say you care
But all I see
Is neglect and unfair

You say you'll be there
whenever I call
You say you'll catch
My every fall

Yet instead you
Ignore my cries
And catch, you dont
You push me down

You get drunk and
Go on an angry rage
You make me feel
Like I'm in a cage

Sometimes I wonder
If its all for ***
If you use me just
To fill your need

The hunting and fishing
Friends and stuff
They get more of you
than I ever will

A game is first
The stand ties it
You fall asleep on me
I haven't heard a word

You don't check in
No notification
you could disappear
And I wouldn't know why

It stresses me out
Makes me worry
Keeps me wondering
if its just u and me

Is there another chick
That gets all the love
Is she the one
That keeps you occupied


You say its just me
And only just us
But the way you act
Says there is no us
©LH2012

— The End —