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Aug 2017 · 428
Papa
Leyla Jude Aug 2017
There's a hole in my heart
It makes breathing so hard

You were so young it's so unfair
All I'm feeling is despair

You left me with no warnings
To deal alone with my mourning

You were my father, my hero
You helped me with my sorrows

Tell me who will teach me now
All about life, just tell me how

How can I go on with my life
When in my chest there's a knife

You were my everything
Now I'm just nothing
Aug 2015 · 1.3k
I'm more like a dude
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
I've always been the good pal
not the one you take to the bal
I'll never be girly and cheesy
people'll maybe say I'm freaky
I'd rather wear snickers and jeans
than wait for the charming prince
I'm the one who likes junk food
not the girl this guy finds cute
I thought I was fine with that
but now I'm feeling kinda sad
I know I'm more like a dude
I hope that's just the prelude
Aug 2015 · 1.0k
Stupid cancer
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
Life is just unfair
I've always known that
First you lost your hair
Then you left too fast

You were **** strong
But still it wasn't enough
Anyway it couldn't last long
I know we never survive that stuff

I'll forever think you were too young
To leave us here with a fragile memory
You'll never see my sister have a son
Or assist to her wedding ceremony

I won't share anything more with you
Because of that stupid cancer
Grandma you know I love you
Yet I should have told you before
Aug 2015 · 447
How did it feel ?
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
How did it feel ?
It hurt...

It hurt so much my heart broke
And my chest implodeĀ 
It hurt so bad it made me sick
Now I just want to sleep

It hurt like it never had
I know my words sound sad
It hurt because it was real
And at first that wasn't the deal

It hurt just to think of it
Even for a little bit
It hurt to know I was wrong
To think it would last long

It hurt 'cause it had to
I just need to go through
It hurt but one day it won't
Since someone will heal my wound
Aug 2015 · 881
Mistakes
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
I keep making mistakes all the time
Without even learning my lesson
To me, life seems just so unkind
I often wish I was still seven

I regret pretty much everything
What I did and what I couldn't do
I'm not even good at forgetting
Even though I'd really like to
Aug 2015 · 723
Love hurts
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
As soon as you allow yourself to love someone, you allow them to hurt you.

Maybe I just didn't want to be hurt...
Aug 2015 · 575
The worst
Leyla Jude Aug 2015
I don't care we're not together anymore
I don't care I may hurt sometimes
And I'm probably full of remorses
But that's not what makes me rhyme

I understand I didn't act the right way
And I know I'm hardly lovable
So I don't hate you for what you say
I just some times feel uncomfortable

I don't cry because you're definitely gone
I can imagine what you were thinking
But no, the worst is that you moved on
And I'm here in my bed, ...sinking.
Jul 2015 · 2.4k
Acting
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
I've lived all my life acting,
Acting like I was fine.
Only pretending,
Never showing what's behind.

Then I met you, something started,
But nothing changed anyway.
I didn't want to be broken-hearted,
So I let my feelings in the doorway.

At least that's what I thought

Cause when you left me,
My world just crumbled down.
I didn't know you were the key,
The only one that count.

After a while I couldn't handle more,
I had to talk, to cry, to share.
Now I know I won't do it anymore,
After all, life's just unfair.

and acting is my shield
Jul 2015 · 886
Was it love ?
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
I don't know if I loved you,
or if I loved being in love.
Maybe my ego hurt more than my heart,
cause I feel like for you I wasn't enough.
I don't know if I miss your fingers on my skin,
or only being so sweetly touched.
Perhaps you weren't the one,
but just one within much.
I don't know if I was happy with you,
or just glad to be in someone's heart.
It might not be what love was supposed to be,
but in fact, simply a false start.
Jul 2015 · 1.4k
Disgust
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
Everytime you open your stupid mouth
I just want to stab you with knives
Each time I see your face I feel sick
Oh how I wish you could end in the Styx
It's not hate it's just pure disgust
You only deserve to bite the dust
Yes you were once important in my life
But that was before I thought twice
Now I'm finally moving on
You're nothing more than an old vision
Jul 2015 · 738
Life
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
My heart was covered by ice
Now it has melted cause of lies
And I realize what's under it
Is way too weak
I had never cried
Now my pillow shines bright
I used to be strong
Now I feel like in these stupid songs
I've got knives in my chest
My throat is all compressed
It's so hard to keep breathing
I guess I just started what's called living
Jul 2015 · 1.0k
Lost
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
I'm lost between what I feel and what I think

Between what seems good and what seems right

I don't know where I'm going even less where I'm from

I don't know who I am or who I should be, I just have no idea
Jul 2015 · 1.1k
Trust again
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
I don't think I'll let someone in my heart again
It hurts so bad, so easily, is it worth it ?
I know my chest can't once more handle this pain
And I still can't find out any benefits

I won't be broken by anyone for any reason
I'll be my only confidant my own master
And this time, like a phoenix, I'll be risen
Cause no one will have enough power to see me suffer
Jul 2015 · 682
Did I liked it ?
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
Last night was a weird night
When we went out of the light
I was drunk but I recall
You took me in your arms, so tall
And we kissed it was so strange
More than once it was French
I couldn't avoid you
Or maybe just didn't want to
Was it just the hard stuff
Or could it be a real crush
I think I need to admit
I don't know if I liked it
Jul 2015 · 1.2k
Hiding
Leyla Jude Jul 2015
I try to look brave, confident and strong
in front of everyone, it may be wrong.
It's because I learned to hide
what I really feel inside.
Even if it kills me, I am too proud
to show the real me to the crowd.
Unlike most people I always thought
it's better to have regrets than remorses.
So yes I'm dying behind my disguise
but you'll never see it through my eyes.
Jun 2015 · 464
How could you...
Leyla Jude Jun 2015
He was my flaw, my kryptonite
I know we broke up months ago
But still I couldn't let him go
That's surely why I cry tonight

You knew all about how I felt
you're the one who helped me hold on
But then I saw the attraction
between you two, yes I could tell

I kept saying "she's not like that"
Cause I had so much faith in you
Or I couldn't admit it, that's true
And you just didn't have the right

Finally you are both dating
All I do is think about it
And now I really feel like ****
It's just too hard understanding
Jun 2015 · 655
Father
Leyla Jude Jun 2015
You held me in your arms,
no matter how I felt.
You kept me safe from harm,
I am under your spell.

With you I always have fun,
nobody knows me better.
I owe you all I learn,
I have a debt forever.

I am your honey bun,
for the eternity.
I shine like a bright sun,
when you are next to me.

You make me feel worthy,
even when life is tough.
So you don't have to worry,
you are more than enough.
Jun 2015 · 1.5k
Colorblind
Leyla Jude Jun 2015
I'm looking forward the moment when I'll be fine again
I can't remember the days when I didn't feel this pain

If only you told me what I was about to go through
Maybe now I would not be this broken heart to rescue

I want to be happy, to laugh, I want to be complete
And most of all, I really need to be back on my feet

No matter what it takes, I just want you out of my mind
But it seems like all you did, was to leave me colorblind.
Jun 2015 · 332
Things I hate about you
Leyla Jude Jun 2015
I hate when you're happy
I hate it when you cry
I hate when you make fun of me
Even worse when you avoid my eyes
I hate the sound of your laugh
I hate it when you're drunk
I hate you broke my heart in half
I hate you left me like junk
I hate it when you're not around
And the way you exhaust me when you're there
I hate you saw me in the background
I hate you dumped me with no air
I hate you date my bestfriend
And the way she fell for you
I hate the way it all end
I hate that we didn't argue
I hate you always take up my mind
And the way I can't find sleep
I hate that you were too kind
I hate that I fell to deep.
Inspired from a poem heard in the movie "10 things I hate about you"

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