I long to be aside the trees
By the river that I once knew
Before the storms had stripped the breeze
And the fog had stolen the dew

Once, I returned to that old bed
That captured my time as a boy
I thought the trip would clear my head
That the sun I could still enjoy

Laying upon the cracked, dried clay
Where I’d sit all those years ago
Wasn’t the same as in my day
When my heart knew nothing of snow.

I'll take this space
adequately filled
with no one

And I'll drown it
introspectively
with ire

Conspicuous
consumption of
high regard

of breathless absence
and your presence
so willful

straining against
flitting away
from here

Life is a multitude of refusals
I am not this, I refuse to be
For this is not enough.

First I must be something other
Than what I am-
Then I’ll be me.

I am not your brother,
Not today at least
For this is not enough.

First I must become
As the others are, and
then I will be me.

I am not a dancer,
Though I move my feet-
For this is not enough.

First I must be educated
On that which must be free,
and then
I will be me.

I am not much of anything,
As far as I can see
For this is not enough
For somebody to be.

First I will move somewhere
Far away from me
Where I no longer see myself-
Then I will be me.

Lion and lamb, lover and fiend
Steam and shine, fine and crude
Through this and more I would careen
To be to you what you’re to me-
Sweet fantasy, from dreams removed.

Looking at you, i have to wonder:
Can you see both of me?
Like watching a ragged little dog
Chasing itself around the base of a tree-
Head, now tail, now head, now tail
What must be going through its mind?
Because right now I’m all head, I’m sure of it-
But last night I was all tail, did you know?
Helpless little thing could
Spin itself sick with this
Round-the-tree
Is-a-friend
Got-to-get
Round-the-tree.
So if you’re watching,
Just give it a shout
Or let it run
Until you’ve seen enough.

We wander
in the darkest nights,
searching for light.
Aimlessly we walk,
finding nothing.
In the light
of the century,
we hope
we don't give up.
And still we continue onwards.

Blame all your problems on me.
Regarding your empty sea.
Often letting go without care.
Keen to surmise when not being fair.
Entranced in your little fantasy.
Never thinking naturally.
Admitting you were wrong would be a start.
Nothing is wrong in your heart.
Dabbling in your sick and twisted ways.
Always expecting me to be the one who obeys.
Favoring your pills over your flesh and blood.
Rambling in pain only wanting to be loved.
Acting like all is well.
Immune to your false tell.
Drifting far away from this dark haze.

Secret message: Broken and afraid.