I don't get it
What the actual ******* want from me

Talk! Say it!
You don't have to ignore me
You don't have to talk sarcasticly
Be true! Make it clear!

So I do understand
The actual thing you want from me
If I did wrong so I can apologise
If I am behaving bad so I can improvise

But don't ignore me
Dont make me feel useless
I have heart too
I have feelings

But sometimes this silly mind of mine can be tactless
It can be hard for me to catch up on things if you did't tell
Because what seems right to me might seems wrong to you
So say it! Talk!
I am a human too
I am not perfect.

One nice man and one young lady
They had been bestfriends since forever
One day he knelt down on his knees
And said "My young lady, will you marry me?"
She said "That's not funny, get up you fool"
He Gave her a serious look. His eyes showed pain
"You can't be serious!"
He held her hands and said "TBH I am, I love you"
"No we can't, we are bestfriends"
"Learn to love me as much as I love you. You won't regret, I promise you"
She laughed as in disbelief of what he just said
He stood up. He smiled and said "I dare you"
He walked away with a very painful look pasted on his face
She stared at his back and laughed awkwardly. She whispered "You don't have to.. Because I love you more than you do love me. I have always be".

I'm sick enough i might die
I can take no more pain
But it is just not 'The Time' yet
God, my soul inside you still haven't take

He gives me pain to **** the sins cause by my mistakes
He gives me pain as a chance to change

Dear god, you still let me breath
As I awaken with fully recovered soul today,
I whispered Alhamdulillah, Allah you're so great

Aku tak pernah anggap kau penting tau,
langsung tak pernah.
Balik-balik muka kau,
Balik-balik muka kau,
Pastu satu hari kau takde,
Aku mula cari kau.      
Tiba-tiba kau jadi penting,
Sampaikan tertoleh-toleh kiri kanan cari kau.
Pastu tengok kau,
Dekat belakang tembok pandang aku,
Senyum.
Celakanya,
Berdegup jantung aku.

If there are only two humans,
One must be good, one must be bad,
Which one should I be?
Both cannot be good
Neither both can be bad,
If both are good,
The world then too peace,too boring.
If both are bad,
The world then too chaotic,too tiring.
Just like in the movies,
We need twists and fun,
Then shall I be..
Angel or devil?
Or.. either one with mask?

He is one lonely man
He lives in his own world
The world where he can expands his happy imagination into wild and fascinating one
He talks when he feels the need to
He tweets when he wants to
He does what he wants to do
He talks sweet
Got ladies head over heels over him
His every word does hurt but it has point
He is one of a kind. A kind that attracts me
A lot

"Through the health and the sick,
Through the thick and the thin,
Through happy moments and the hardship,
Together forever."*
Your vow.

Are those words really are cheap?
because I see now you are no where to be seen.

He used to call me every night
Just to make sure I had a pleasant day
When I'm sad, he cherished me up
When I cry, he lent me his shoulders and comfort me
Whenever we went out for date, he would held my hands
Before we say our goodbyes, he would kiss me and lean in whispering the 3 powerful sweet words "I LOVE YOU" which was never fail to send shiver down my spine

The way he moves, the way he acts, I'm just in love in every part of him
He showed me light when I'm lost
He is the sun, The unforgettable one
With him near, Sky was never dark
The light he brought along, Brighten up my whole world at all time

One day he walked away
He said he had never love me
He told me not to call him again, he won't pick up his phone, he won't call back

It has been months
I'm missing him, badly
I need those affection he used to give
I need those hands which were used to hold mine
I need him

Without him around, I'm dead
And I'm barely holding on

Then I found out he's dead
He got tumor, passed away a month ago
Half a year after our break up
His surgery failed
The fact that he broke with me because he was sick break my heart
About he had never love me, it was a lie
**** it! How can I know nothing about this?!

Without him around, I'm nothing less than an almost dead flower
Sways around whenever wind blows
I might fall at any moment

I'm scared and I'm barely holding on..

There, a lonesome one
With a lot of problems
And confused too
Don't know what to do

When it comes to love
She thought she knows it best
But just not ready yet
Though that's not the fact

She's a lonesome one.

When it comes to love
She's just too afraid
To give what she has
And accept something back

But she feels so lonely
When she is now with nobody
She is so complex
She is a mystery.

Attention was all she need

She did hunger strike
She cut her wrist
She intentionally failed exams

For a very uncertain attention she's hoping from them
But no one bother pay a glance

The efforts, the hopes
All been thrown in the ocean of vains
Yes, her life too.

Is attention that great?
Does it worth a life?

A friend of mine reminds me of a shadow
She was there when I am all good and fine
And disappeared when time is tough and hard
Just like a shadow
Only there when there's lights
And disappeared in the darkest night.

Once, a friend asked me why I write poems --

"Maybe because I am happy
Maybe because I am sad
Maybe because I want to find release
*of so many emotions built inside "

You disguised as somebody else
So they won't leave you
So they'll keep loving you
But are you sure it's you?
The one they're staying with,
The one they love,
Or did you forget?
You disguised as somebody else.

I ♥ U

Love songs and sad songs are you,
Sun and moon are you,
stars too.
The flowers and trees are you,
The happiness and sadness are you,
The cure and pain are you,
The addiction is you,
The obsession is you,
The attraction is you,
The illusion is you.

What aren't you?
You are the drug,
The cure and the disease.

The water, the fire, the virus, the lies,
the truth, the bad, the best,
All are you.

There are so many things that I didn't know,
Things that I don't even want to know about.

Because most of things I knew,
I wish I didn't know.

I am a little too tired of it.