I woke up alone in my bed
welcoming the air to cave in
creating a melody as I breathe out
making the rays dance around my room

then my heart took another beat
and the walls were tuned in
like a crowd clueless about the show

stories beneath me, my feet stepped on
memories reviving from floor’s glory
an ancient soul could have sworn
I was the first to feel this lonely

life surrendered as I whispered
agony to push my soul up
from a surface of forged memories
resisting reality to keep me numb

for once, I was able to feel the sky
lifting my tanned fingers to wrap the clouds
a bird rested on my branch to ask
“how does it feel to wander bewildered,
  wrecking the future and sleeping wounded,
  reaching the sky to neglect the ground’s fight?
  I will get you down for one more chance
  but remember, it will be you leading the way.
  it has been a pleasure meeting you,
  I will read a story to wake you.”

I write for the dead
whom I keep alive
long live the dead of the night
standing in my memory to keep it alive

I wail for the dead
devoted tears mended my spine
voices inside my head
conducted my fall

I lied to the dead
their graves haunted my grounds
faked my death to escape
but my soul got stolen in chains

let the dead live within
soon they will gnaw
at the deepest roots
until the soul cave in
howling of sorrow
longing for a rescue
but the body reeks
bleak and shallow
emptiness then
for infinite days

the sound of nothingness
soothing my brain
from missed calls
buried under my pillow

a burning candle
smothering the roof
but my throat choked on
words that never made my note

I slept away my hopelessness
praying the rain would wash it away
the thunder woken a light within me
my desires stormed like a clenched beast

I never intended to harm you
if I could change the past
I would never run away from you
alas, self. I was too cruel for you to last

in a room full of people
my heart lingers of loneliness
as the shadows of my fingers
turn into one soulless silhouette.

intertwisted skin solaced in warmth
dreading my own happiness
like a painted smile
with all of my pain
underneath it
a southed yearn dying north
urged to lead the madness.

I miss you when you were a stranger
just a thought in someone’s brain
you captivated me faster than a beetle
a sweet memory keeping me sane

but even before the fourth night
I knew our ground wasn’t stable
I cried in a gray colored corner
reading stories about a dead woman

I didn’t realize the pain that I created
blurry in my head were your words
to sweep you out wasn’t the hardest
but to think it was all to fill a dark void

I walk empty handed again
it’s a familiar feeling yet I loath it
my fingers braided you with poems
now I unknot us from a virulent lane

now I am a stranger breathing fire
within your lungs I ash the moments
of your lies my kind heart was tired
pillows we dreamt on left us in torment

all i know is
I’m never wrong
about you
my pristine dream
absent fires tell a story
of a flooded land
merged with nicotine
is how I would like to flee

tell my story like
you could no longer speak
split my violet letter
into two thick parts
each of them to hold
your tears that filled up carts

it’s not like I don’t miss you
I just didn’t think this would be
such a chaotic lane
but I’ll shout your name
one last time standing
on the trembling cliff

like the state of my life
where my ground was tamed
and I was within your story
but you ran out of ink
and never stayed

I was only four
A chaser for dreams
I held my colored fist
Pacing to find the scenes

Since I was eight
I started losing friends
Crying on playgrounds
Burying my head in the sand

Twelve years have passed
Silenced by women at decks
Obey or lose your badge, miss
Says the man who swallows pills

When I was fourteen
I got lost in worthless daydreams
Sharp razors looked so serene
Petrifying my mortal craze

I thought when I turn eighteen
I could magically reappear
The hallways were soundless
But the sirens woken my mistakes

Now i’m twenty one of age
Living on an empty land
I fluster my body inside a cage
I smoke to wean my soul’s pride

Will I live past this age?
I replenish with rage
Years pass and nothing change
Who knows if today’s my last day