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4.3k · Sep 2013
Care
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
My darling,
I would care to be your lover
And give you every pleasure.
I would care to be your sweetheart
And sweet to you forever.

I would care to give you my body
If you are careful with me.
I would care to bring you ecstasy
Mine is in watching yours increase.

I would care to be all you desire,
And then even more.
I would care to show you the stars
From the living room floor.

I would care to surprise you,
Entice you, delight you.
I would care to run free with you and please you.
Would you care for me?
3.6k · Aug 2013
I Don't Believe in Love
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
I don't believe in love anymore.
I believe in emotion,
But emotions aren't real.
The don't mean anything.
I don't believe in love.

I don't believe in that ideal of unconditional love.
If it was truly unconditional
You would still love them when they don't love you,
No matter how long.
It doesn't happen, I don't believe in love.

We love someone because of how they make us feel,
Not just who they are.
We fall, we hurt, we spin our stories.
We create our own demise.
I don't believe in love.
2.9k · Sep 2013
Want
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
I want a lover.
Someone to share an intimate touch.
To bask in their presence.
To feel their body.

I want to bring a man joy.
To see the peaceful smile grow
As I gently stroke his chest,
As I kiss his lips, his cheek, his ear, his neck.

I want to feel him hard against me
As my hand moves down his torso.
Closer and closer to his ever growing ****
And down the side of his groin and upper thigh.

I love the smell of a man's body as he gets more and more aroused.
I breathe it in as I kiss his chest
Quickly flicking my tongue over him here and there.
As I move down, touching, kissing, licking.

Finally I'd put my mouth to his hard ****.
I kiss the tip, quick flick of my tongue
Then kissing the shaft.
I give a lick from base to tip, while caressing with my hand.

I revel over how ***** he is for me
As I slip my mouth over his dripping tip.
Oh yes, release that pre-*** into my mouth
As I slide my lips down your **** and **** you.

And I release, pause, stretch out the pleasure.
I gently glide my fingers from your ***** to tip
While looking deep in your eyes, smiling.
Both of us enjoying each other's pleasure.

You would roll me on my back
Reciprocating the thrill I just gave you.
Gently stroking and caressing my breast, torso and wet *****.
Kissing and licking, increasing my excitement.

And the thrill as your head goes between my legs.
You lick my ***** and it pulses.
You **** my **** and I get even wetter.
My muscles tense with the thrills shooting through me.

You love my arousal as much as I love yours.
Your licking and ******* makes me so wet.
I am more than ready for your **** inside me.

You know it.
You slip your tongue inside me instead.
Bringing me to the edge before you raise up.
You slowly slide your body over me.

Your hard wet **** is perfectly positioned
To slide into my waiting ***** as you move up my body.
The feeling of having you inside me
Is more exciting than anything else.

As my warm ***** drips over your ****
I tighten and release my muscles
To milk every last drop of *** from you.
Waiting for the look that makes me hornier than ever, your *** face.

I love your pleasure, and knowing I affect you like that.
As you push deeper and harder into me
My once loud moans and cries of 'Yes' and 'Oh God'
Become muffled, caught in the breathless ecstasy.

Yes, yes... YES!
You ***, squirting your beautiful *** deep inside me.
I few flicks and I ***, dripping all over your twitching ****.

Oh yes
Pos *** bliss
Hold me
And let me smell our powerful ******* on you.
Yes I do realise the many flaws in this, not really a poem, but you should see how messy my writing got about half way through.  And typing was interesting!  So yeah, not great form, grammar, text etc.
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
To the ones who have a brain
And know how to use it.
But when a passion kicks in
They seem to lose it.

To those who are smarter than that.
Those of us who know better,
But don't do better.
Blinded by passion.

Those of us whose brains keep tapping us on the shoulder
As we wildly run after our hearts.
Knowing the heartache we're running towards
And powerless to stop it.

Here's to the ones who can converse about
The origins of the universe, time theory, and physics.
Who can't string two words together
When all they can think about is touching who they are talking to.

"Oh... the power and the passion"
Oh the power in the passion.
The power to sweep you away regardless.
The power to take over the body and mind.

"Where the heart leads, the mind will follow"
Perhaps begging the heart to rethink
(Oh foolish mind).
Where the heart leads, I will follow.
Oh foolish, intelligent, me.
1.9k · Dec 2013
Apart
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Looking around on a sunny day
Barbeque sizzling, music playing
People talking, laughing.
It's a great atmosphere and I think
"This should be food for poetry"

And still I draw a blank
And I wonder why.
Maybe it's because
I don't really feel part of it.
New job, socially awkward.

I go off to the side
To sit down and write
Looking on from the outside, my norm.
I even brought magazines and poetry book
Downstairs to the barbeque.

I guess I created this
Carrying my barrier of books in front of me.
Easier than trying
Easier than feeling awkward and stupid, again.
But I know I'm not helping.

I have moments of feeling secure.
A confident, capable woman.
Me and my 'moments'
Some moments I would love to 'live in'
Some I do my best to avoid.
1.9k · Dec 2013
Focus
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 24*

Watching the Kardashians on TV at work
He says 'Oh I hate them'
'Isn't she engaged to so-and-so?'
Really? If you 'hate' them why do you follow what they do?

I'm not particularly fussed on the Kardashians
For that reason I don't know
What's going on in their life.
Really not interested.

Because I don't know about them
I don't know them well enough
To decide to hate them.
I guess some people enjoy negativity.

Continuing comments on the people involved
Why are their lives so important to you?
Perhaps if you hate them, avoid them?
Sure it's none of my business

But I can't avoid your opinion
I would be happy to do so.
Please keep it none of my business.
Just like the Kardashians
1.8k · Jan 2014
Spartans
Kitty Prr Jan 2014
Work warriors
Power through your work
Claim your prize
A certificate trophy
A bonus reward.
At work we are put into teams and my team is called Spartans.  Slow poem day lol.
1.5k · Dec 2013
Free Falling
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 4*

Falling is just like flying
Until you hit the ground.
Hit rock bottom.
Maybe that's why they call it falling in love.

Feels like flying
Or a bit like dying.
Stomach in your throat
At the sudden drop.

Exiting and scary
Where is this going
Am I soaring
Or am I crashing?

Spinning around.
Which way's up,
Which way's down?
Don't let me hit the ground.

In his arms,
Is he my superman?
Will he catch me as I fall
And keep me from harm?

It's out of my control now
I fell without warning.
Surrender to the trip, wow
Sensations overwhelm me.
1.4k · Dec 2013
Heat
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 12*

Heat radiates through me.
the heat of summer
The heat of an unventilated apartment
The heat of passion

And I love it
And I hate it
The powerful burning
Intense and overwhelming

the strength of the heat excites me.
No release from it exhausts me.
But if I had to choose
I would choose the heat.

It stifles the mind
and intensifies the body
Enhancing every sensation
Making me aware of every part of me.

Rather overwhelming heat
Than cold death
Where sensation is drained
As your body goes numb.

In this heat I am truly in my body
I honour it as I search for relief
Trying to escape it and revel in it
At the same time

But it's ok
The heat will come again.
1.4k · Jul 2013
Worship
Kitty Prr Jul 2013
I would be your goddess
To draw you in, captivate you.
Worship me.
You are my *** god.
I adore you completely.

The sacrifice of your ****** pleases me.
I reward your worship by giving myself to you
As I take you.

I give so much more than you will ever know
I give it gladly, freely.
Your goddess isn't just the goddess of ***.
I am also the goddess of Love.

We won't mention that.
You can't take  my love,
You can take my body.
I know you can't love me,
But you give me your body.

I find bliss in the intimacy you come to me with.
I feed on your desire for me
And revel in your lust.
Your essence is beautiful
Should this be marked as explicit since it mentions the big 'O'?  I am not sure.
1.3k · Dec 2013
Doubtful
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 16*

Second guessing
Unsure of what I'm certain
So doubtful
When I should know better.

Old insecurities
Raise their ugly heads.
Years of growth
Fade away in a moment.

But it's just a moment
This too shall pass
We all have days
Of feeling unsure.

I am a strong
Confident woman
Not the scared, insecure
Girl I used to be
1.3k · Jun 2013
Mistakes
Kitty Prr Jun 2013
Mistakes were made.
Getting involved with you was a mistake,
Falling for you was a mistake.
Choosing not to see you again because it's wrong was a mistake,
And starting to see you again is a mistake.

Ahh sweet mistakes.
The imperfections that make life so beautiful.
I will gladly make mistakes with you.
My intellect shouts 'this can only end badly'
I don't care.
Each moment with you is beautiful,
I choose to experience every one to the full.

Tomorrow can look after itself.
Today, my sweet mistake, I am yours.
1.3k · Dec 2013
Pressure
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 8*

Pressure creates urgency
It can evoke action
Or cause immobility

I wait til the edge
Of my deadline
And make myself do it

Sometimes it flows naturally
Forcing me to stop second guessing
Then there's today

Late for bed
Keeping others up in our bedsit
Waiting... Blank

**** pressure
Can't focus
What am I doing?
This is my poem for yesterday.  I did write it yesterday, just didn't have to to put it online.
1.3k · Oct 2013
Your Choice
Kitty Prr Oct 2013
What is your desire?
I can give it to you.
Do you want my naked body ready for you
Or some **** lingerie to tantalize.

Do you want to take me to the bedroom,
Or if you can't wait, **** me on the couch.
Would you like to get a little public?
At the movie, restaurant, beach, car wash.

Do you want to pleasure me with licking,
Or do you need to **** me right now.
Hot urgent hard ***
To release all that *** built up in your *****.

Do you want to give.
Do you want to take.
Or both, full pleasure.
Your desire is my pleasure.

I am Lover
All you want, need, and desire.
I love to make you ******.
Your hot sexuality makes me ***.

I am Lover
In every way.
I give you myself
Tell me how you want me.

Do what you want to me.
Where you want, when you want.
My body is yours
Every inch of it.

My lips are yours
I will kiss how you wish.
My tongue is yours
What shall I lick.

My hands are yours
Eager to touch you.
My neck is yours
Should you want it.

The curve of my breast is yours
Please do enjoy them.
My large pink ******* are yours
Make them hard if you want.

My *** is yours
If that's what you like.
My wet ***** is yours
Your pleasure is my pleasure!

My legs are yours
To enjoy or guide.
Without direction they will wrap around you.
Take your fill.
Now just because I am 5 foot nothing doesn't mean that with "Every inch of it." I am any less generous than taller women lol.
1.1k · Sep 2013
Divine
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
*** is a divine act.
Done right, it is beautiful and wondrous.

The intimacy between two people.
Knowing each other so fully.

Exploring every detail of each others bodies.
Enjoying each others  bodies.

Giving yourself completely to each other.
Receiving and giving pure pleasure.

Whether it's long and slow
With plenty of foreplay.

Or an intense ******
Full of fun and excitement.

*** is sensual
Beautiful
Fun
Intense.

*** makes me happy
(It's scientific - endorphins)

Human contact is beautiful.
Skin on skin.

Touch... Kiss... Stroke... Lick
Wrapped around each other.
One inside the other.

And the ******
The only thing powerful enough to stop the divine act of ***.
1.1k · Sep 2013
I am not a Poet
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
I am not a poet.
I have read many poems.
Beautiful, touching,
Clever and meaningful.

I don't use lovely analogies
Or powerful descriptors.
I write lists.
Clear, concise ideas.

I don't leave space
For the reader's interpretations.
No open wandering paths
For them to meander along.

Everything is clearly defined.
With passages precisely laid out
To direst the reader to
EXACTLY what is being said.

Sometimes when a poem wafts into my head
It is more poetic.
But then as I put pent to paper
Only the skeleton remains.

Even this poem
Had a better feel in my head.
Yet another thing to feel
Inadequate about.

I am not trying to wallow
In self-pity (yet again).
I am just not a poet.
I would like to know what I am.
1.1k · Sep 2013
Note to followers
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
I am not sure how things work here so I thought I would let my followers know that I have written a poem which I have marked 'explicit'.  I guess you will have to make sure your settings allow those poems if you want to read it.  Bearing in mind what my ones I don't mark like that are like, be warned, it's practically pornographic (and I might be writing one even more so soon, although I am not sure you could call it a poem).

There's 2 there now, and I was right the second one is more pornographic.  I am not usually quite like that, really, well, anyway...

Ok, now there's 3, I am starting to see a trend here. Hopefully I will be back to normal soon.
1.1k · Dec 2013
Happy Birthday Daughter
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 21*

Today was my daughter's birthday
She turned 20, my how she's grown.
We went out for a nice lunch
And bought stuff at her favourite shop.

Ont the train, I was on my way home
She on her way to work,
She asked me to go have a frozen yoghurt with her.
I love just spending time with my daughter.

I am glad she turned into
The kind of adult I like to be around.
She's intelligent and funny.
An awesome combination.

I love her zest for life.
Her honesty and her wit.
I love her open-mindedness and her intellect.
I love that we can laugh together.

It's such a blessing to have an adult daughter
Whose company you enjoy
And who wants to spend time with you.
She's so outgoing and fun, she keeps me young
My poem-a-day poems seem to be getting less and less poem-y
980 · Nov 2013
Safe as Houses
Kitty Prr Nov 2013
Safe
As  houses
That   used   to
Mean...    something
Stability, security, reliability
Safe   as  houses.  Then  there was
Katrina,                       Haiyan
The                                Christ-
Church         ­                    earth-
quake,                                   the
Japan            tidal-            wave
Land-          scapes­      flattened
For              mi l es.              Safe
Secure         houses              now
Nothing.......b....u...t..........rubble
­Sticks
  and
     tiles
             laying
             f  l  a  t
          across
the ground.
Yes relationships,
i n v e s t m e n t s,
g o v e r n m e n t s,
p l a c e s,   can   be
Safe     as     Houses.
964 · Dec 2013
Ready
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
I am ready.
I have been ready for a while now
Ready and waiting
For you.

I am ready to feel your arms around me,
To smell your scent, to feel your presence.
To know your strength
And your passion.

I am ready for whatever you bring.
As long as you bring it to me.
Bring yourself and all you have within.
If you give it to me I will take it all.

I am ready to give you myself.
I give you my love and my passion.
You have it already.
I am ready for you to truly know it.

Are you ready for me lover?
Are you ready to feel my passion,
That goes hand in hand with my emotions
You can't have just one.

Are you ready for fire and ice
That burns and soothes
Are you ready to feel my gentle warmth,
Roaring heat, and at times my chill.

I can't promise you much.
But I can promise you will know how I feel.
If you don't, just ask
I will always be honest.

Be gentle with my honesty,
Tender with my heart,
And passionate with my body.
And you will find me just as gentle, tender and passionate.
962 · Jan 2014
Deep Pressed
Kitty Prr Jan 2014
Not so much a black dog
As a slow grey mist.
To a degree, brought on by circumstance.
But there's more to it than that.

When it's all too much
And all I want to do is lay down
Sleep... Escape... Stop.
Sleep feels like a hug.

I know that's not the way to deal with it
And exercise relieves mild depression.
But when something makes me sad, angry, confused,
Sleep feels good, the drift in makes me happy.

Short-term gain over long-term benefit.
I know better than that.
But my emotions rule.
I need to find the strength to take control.

Writing this during my breaks
On a beautiful sunny day
I want to sleep.
Want... desire, a force that's always too powerful for me.

The ideal solution would be
Desire what I need.
I need to process that thought.
Here's hoping I desire to.
937 · Sep 2013
Dirty
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
Talk ***** to me.
Let me know how your body aches for me.
I want to know your every desire.
Tell me whenever I make you hard.

Tell me every time you *** thinking of me,
If I can't be blessed to be with you.
Tell me how much you want me,
What you want to do to me.

Make me know your desire and passion.
Make me know your uncontrollable lust.
Tell me how much your hard **** is dripping.
And make my heart race wanting you more and more.

Hide nothing from me.
Come to me as naked in words
As you would in bed with me.
And ***.

When I know your desire
And feel your passion,
When my ***** is wet at the slightest thought of you.
Then come to me in person.

Don't leave me wanting
And I will make sure
That your desire is fulfilled
And your passion satisfied.

With you hard throbbing **** deep inside me
And the muscles of my ***** stroking your shaft.
We release ourselves to each other and to passion
And our crescendo reaches new heights where even dreams won't go.
Sorry poetic form becomes lacking in the emotion of the moment, so to speak.
930 · Dec 2013
Sweet As
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, number 22*

How much of my choices are my own?
Physiological compulsions
Societal pressures.

How much of my choices are my own
I muse, as I grab another sugary treat.
My own personal addiction.

It's not respected as an addiction
People smirk,
Or quip 'Oh yeah I have a sweet tooth too'

'No, no' I say
'It's medically proven
To have the same reaction in the brain as *******'

I can see them thinking
'Yeah right' as they smile and say
'Oh really?'

But the pressure to partake
'Just this once won't hurt'
Really?  Do you say that to alcoholics too?

Are people quitting smoking
Expected to smoke for a day or two,
Because it's Christmas, Easter, Birthdays...

How much of my choices are my own?
When you can't actually live without
Some sort of sugar.

In a society where anything with a hint of processing
Is likely to have some refined sugar
And the more convenience the higher the risk.

How much is my choice?
When managing my addiction is more about
Keeping sugar to a bearable level.

An addiction that can't be cut out completely
As my hand starts to shake at the mere thought of
Having to 'quit' again.
926 · Nov 2013
That's Fantastic!
Kitty Prr Nov 2013
Isn't it fantastic,
What fantasies are made of?
Where the mind might wander
And lurk without discretion.

Fantastic flight of fancy,
We fancy to be reality.
but fantasies sit awkwardly in the real world.
Not quite fitting right.

The corners dig and poke at life.
Fantasy insisting on what isn't practical.
Fantasy requires; more time, more money, less commitment.
conflicting needs that can't work.

Reality insists on choices.
You can't work less and have more money.
You can't love two men
And have everyone happy.

Reality rubs at the sharp edges of fantasy.
Wearing it down with compromise
To fit into reality.
But the mind is limitless, able to conceive the fantastic.

Wouldn't it be fantastic?
Wouldn't it just.
892 · Oct 2013
Blind
Kitty Prr Oct 2013
"Love is blind" so he must love me
Because he fails to see
How miserable I am, sad and alone
He has no idea, laughing on his own.

The happier he gets, the sadder I feel.
Alone in a crowd and down at heel.
"Love is blind" and he can't see
The broken heart inside of me.

At least he's happy, one of us should be
But why isn't some happiness allowed for me.
I guess it's easy to be happy with no needs to fulfill.
If I could stop needing, but it's not chosen by will.

So hurting and alone, needing love and touch
I take what I can get, to my scraps I clutch.
I'll talk **** and know the power in my words
Enjoying their effect and the desire that returns.
I thought I would try rhyming for a change.  Yes I know 'words' and 'returns' is pushing it lol
884 · Dec 2013
The Juggler
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 6*

I need to cut my toenails
I need to wash some clothes
I need to do some dishes
I barely blow my nose.

I need to get more sleep
I need to exercise
I need to find time for me
I need to close my eyes.

How do I make it work?
Sleep more
Exercise more
Do less
Do more

I have to MAKE myself do things
So life's not just eat, sleep, work
Sure I might have some time
But sleep is all that comes to mind.

Don't burn the candle at both ends.
Don't over do it.
Take some time to look after yourself.
But live life to the fullest?

Make sure you're healthy and exercise.
Have a hobby for balance.
Don't pack your days morning to night
It's not good to always be busy.
876 · Dec 2013
Fucking the Prime-Minister
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 13*

**** John Key
Why not, he has pretty much said '**** New Zealand'
We say we don't want something,
He says we are 'uneducated and ignorant'

Well guess what John Key?
You're responsible for the state of our education system.
We arrange referendums on important issues
He states he has no intention of abiding by the outcome.

******* John Key.
You **** us
You **** our environment
You **** our economy.

***** the masses to promote the elite.
The poor get poorer
So your rich mates get richer
There's one talent you do have.

You don't have a talent for handshakes
Or earning respect
But you know how to keep the poor down.
Take away everything.

Cut their benefits so they can't survive
(Just ask the food banks)
Make getting quality education harder without money.
Take away support systems.

Well you know what?
The poor might get knocked back,
Start to believe there's no point in voting,
Feel powerless... for a while.

But remember
As you make the number of poor grow
They  will realise they are the majority.
They will rise up, so...

You're going to be ******
Not sure this is actually a poem
858 · Jun 2013
My Lover
Kitty Prr Jun 2013
My lover is silent.
But oh those sweet sentences that fill my mind.
The words he never spoke,
That fill his mouth from inside me.

My lover is no longer.
He touched me and left me,
As lovers do.
And now all I have are the strings I pull
On the lover in my mind.

Hello Lover, I remember you.
I remember every part of you.
I hold you, you won't get away that easy.
You are mine now.

You can control your silence.
You can't silence my mind.
I can't silence my mind,
It's my solace and my torment.

Goodnight Lover,
I will see you again in the morning,
Whether I want to or not.
Whether you want me to or not.

There you are.
853 · Sep 2013
Bad Stuff
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
Heartache
Heartbreak
Loneliness
Loss

What did I lose?
It was never mine to start with.

Heartache
Heartbreak
Loneliness
Need

Deep aching need
(Heart-aching)
"Know the difference between want and need"
My fathers words ring loud and clear.

Fair call Dad.
I can live without romantic love,
Without intimacy
So that would make it a 'want'.

Heartache
Heartbreak
Loneliness
Anger

Dr Phil "Anger is a surface emotion,
There is always hurt of fear underneath"
Hurt!
(=Heartache and Heartbreak, can't have three the same)

**** you Cat!
You over analyze!

Blah, yuck and horrible stuff.
Feel like crying.

Heartache
Heartbreak
Loneliness
Loss.
845 · Dec 2013
I Need To Be Me
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 23*

I wore my pretty dress to work today.
In the past I thought it was too nice for work
But I wore it yesterday, and really liked it
And that made me think.

Why would I be uncomfortable
Wearing something I like?
Am I really worried about being different
Or 'looking silly'?

I'm not fifteen anymore.
I don't have to dress down just because others do.
I don't have to 'dumb it down'
Because I want to fit in.

It's ok not to laugh at a joke
That's just NOT funny.
I don't have to fake it
Even in a team culture environment.

It's ok to be me,
And it's NOT ok for ANYONE to make me feel otherwise
Not even myself.
I need to be me.
814 · Nov 2013
Maestro Please
Kitty Prr Nov 2013
The maestro plays
And the puppet dances.
To do the maestro's bidding
Is his will.

The maestro plays
And the puppet dances.
The creation develops as
Creator watches.

The maestro plays
And the puppet mesmerizes.
Bringing the maestro
Along for the ride.

The puppet dances
And the maestro plays.
Creating to the rhythm
Of the puppet's moves.

The puppet dances
And the maestro plays.
As the creation
Creates the creator.
785 · Dec 2013
Crap
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 5*

Crap day
Crap day
Crap day

Crying stings my eyes
Even that's not going right for me today

Yesterday I breathed
And wondered if that's enough.
Today I breathed
And could almost wish I hadn't

**** today.

Wouldn't have minded a **** today actually
Another thing that didn't go my way
Thanks for pointing that out.

Now could just do with a hug
And some decadent food
Yip great coping mechanism, I don't care.

I will probably care tomorrow.

Oh well, today is crap
I will ignore consequences
And tomorrow will look after itself
Pretty much stream of consciousness, don't have the energy for anything else.
783 · Sep 2013
Flow
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
Desire rises up like a tidal wave.
Yearning to reach out to another.
The strong flow washing over me,
And within me.

Pushing out, reaching...
The object of my desire is barely known
Surely you can't warrant such an intense reaction,
So soon, so incomplete.

But it flows, I can't hold it back.
I flow.
Wanting more I drift where the current leads.
Giving into desire, but unable to fulfill it.

Such a waste
All this beautiful passion
All the thrilling things that could be done.
Oh what I would do with this desire.

Every drop wasted
Every morsel untasted
Every ****** act, a ghost to lay to rest
With an inadequate eulogy played by my fingers.
Sorry I have been in a very particular state of being lately, sorry if I am starting to sound ******.
765 · Sep 2013
Nerves
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
Why do I get so nervous?
I am a trained actor,
Not great, but in character
I  can face an audience calmly

But as myself??
When I stand in front of
The most casual audience
My legs shake.

I become insecure and nervous
(Trying to hide it)
Even somewhere completely relaxed
And free of pressure.

Why am I not ok with me?
What am I so scared of?
I don't think I'm that bad really,
But maybe deep down inside I do.
My work had a talent show for fun because someone was giving away concert tickets and I read one of my poems.  I was a wreck!  There were only 2 serious contestants (and I still didn't win), and there was no pressure.
764 · Sep 2013
Lessons
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
I want to learn...
Other languages.
To play the saxophone.
To be happy without the kind of love I want.
To be happy without ***, and ok with that.

I want to learn...
To dance in the rain
(**** glasses!)
How to make men desire me uncontrollably.
To stop contradicting myself.

I want to learn...
To draw and create beautiful art.
To dance - ballroom, latin, rock 'n' roll.
To feel secure in myself.
To find a way to live which satisfies
My multiple personalities with conflicting views.

I want to learn how to be happy regardless.
And I don't want to have to,
For some people it comes naturally.
I WANT THAT!

I want to learn...
How to let go of wanting
(But I think I might like it).
Or how to get what I want.
Or to want what I get?

**** it, this is too introspective.
**I just want wild ***
With a tender, passionate Lover!
NOW!
Sorry about the ending, it was giving me a headache and my brain rebelled.
762 · Sep 2013
Broken
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
This is all I've got,
Broken and true.
This is all I've got,
A heart broken in two.

A broken heart
Broken Mind
Broken words
On the line.

Will you take all I have
Broken pieces for you.
Will you take all I am
Broken and bruised.

Would you want me and love me
Knowing the mess that's within?
Would you kiss the broken tears
And help me love again.

This is all I've got,
Clumsy words that clang.
No soft Analogies
Just my crash bang.

This is all I've got
You get what you see.
Not pretty veneer,
'Everything's sweet here'.

A broken spirit crying out
Left dying on the floor
Trying hard to be strong
The weak men abhor.

Waiting for the escape of death
But the broken heart beats on
Aching with every pulse
Bleeding love onto the floor.
757 · Aug 2013
Expectations
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
You know what I expect?
I expect to stop wallowing in self-pity.
I expect to stop feeling miserable just because some guy
Doesn't feel about me the way I feel about him

I expect to get over you.
And I expect to stop beating myself up for it.
So what if I fall quickly,
And make myself get over it when I have to.
That Doesn't make me a bad person.
That's just who I am.

I know who I am.
I know what I have been through
And how much I stuck it out in the past.
We aren't a couple, I'm allowed to move on.

It hurts, I expect that's reasonable.
That's 'getting over' not 'being over'.
But sometimes it hurts less.
People still make me smile, and laugh.
I can be happy without you.

I expect I'll make the same mistake again.
I don't want to,
But I don't know how not to.
I expect my expectations will be my downfall,
And for now, my strength.
756 · Oct 2013
Help
Kitty Prr Oct 2013
I am not coping
Stress
Panic
Fear
It's all too much.

Where is my support?
Sitting next to me using your laptop
You don't notice I'm drowning.

You used to be so supportive
You helped me cope and be strong.
Now I have found my inner strength
You have taken your strength away.

I can cope so much better than before
But not completely, on my own.
Just because I Can cope
Doesn't mean I should have to.

I don't want to cope!
I want to curl up in a ball and cry.
I want someone to hold me while I cry.
I am so tired.
755 · Nov 2013
Time
Kitty Prr Nov 2013
Take time to smell the roses,
Take time out for yourself.
Take time... but time is not
Yours to hold on to.

Time slips by
Even if you could time travel
You still age
Your own time slips by.

Your only choice is now.
The only time you 'have' is not.
Make your choice now,
And remember, your next 'now' holds the consequences.
I don't think this one is very good, and it feels incomplete.
750 · Sep 2013
I Touched
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
I touched myself late last night
At the thought of a man's arms holding me tight.

I touched myself thrilled at how wet
My imaginary lover made me get.

I touched myself yearning for more
Knowing I can't have all I yearn for.

I touched myself and let desire grow
Being swept away by passion's flow.

I touched myself 'til ****** came
And left me wanting the man with no name.
696 · Jun 2013
Desire
Kitty Prr Jun 2013
I have feelings but no words.
I want you
I ache

Yes I know where I stand
I have always known.
You love her, I am just a bit of fun.

And I love him,
You're supposed to be just some fun.
But **** you're lovely,
And **** you're interesting.

**** you're intimate,
Beautifully intimate.
You look, and touch, with meaning
And I want you.

I will try not to love you,
Or try not to say it.
How do you keep your distance
And be so intimate?

You arouse such intense feelings in me
I stopped seeing you so I won't love you.
Maybe it's too late.
But I still want you.

I want to just put it down to desire,
Pretend I never felt anything more
And be with you again.
I want you to look at me, touch me, make me feel.

I want you.
This one's messy, I meant it when I said I have no words.  Everything after the first paragraph is a bit forced.
695 · Feb 2014
The Shape of Brown
Kitty Prr Feb 2014
A tan makes you thinner.
A tan makes those curves seem firmer.
It'll disguise your stretch marks.
White is "pasty".
It's ok, you don't have to bake in the sun.

She looks down at her milky white skin,
Passed down through her mothers line.
A natural English rose.
All those years of battling the sun in her youth.
The only colour she got ranged from pink to searing red.

So a spray tan it is.
Now she has that "healthy glow".
In the mirror she sees all the tricks of the eye.
Now she looks how she's "supposed to".
She fits the shape of brown.

Her skin covered in the chemical concoction.
Does it look too fake?
She doesn't know, but that's ok
No one else knows either, this is the norm.
And she fits the shape of brown.

She looks at her stretch marks.
She used to be uncomfortable about them.
Her adult daughter liked them,
She called them shiny, silvery.  Now a light brown.
But she fits the shape of brown.

She fits into the shape
That society has molded her into.
She fits into society.
No longer that big white sore thumb.
She fits the shape of brown.

One size fit all?
This was inspired by the song in my head when I woke up.  Unfortunately the song was a lot better, but I could only remember the one line "She fits the shape of brown"
693 · Sep 2013
Lead
Kitty Prr Sep 2013
Would you guide me when I need you?
Would you let me lead when I can't go where you need?
Could I trust you when I'm blind?
Would you trust me with your heart?

Take me and lead me.
Take me and thrill me.
Take my body and I will give myself to you.
Take my mind and sweep me away.

If you can, take my heart.
If I dare, take my heart.
There I go again, willing for love.
How do I truly give up on that?

Will you hold me,
And make me believe I'm safe?
Will you believe in me
As much as you make me believe in you?

I want to feel safe
And feel love.
I want to be able to
Give someone all my love.
681 · Aug 2013
Lost
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
I am lost chasing what I can't have
The love of another
(The love of my own).
A great fortune
(Hope of fame now long gone).

Lost in the swirling cascade of emotions.
Lost in love, lust, attachment
(One, some, all?)
Lost in loneliness, sadness, worry.
The fog of emotions building on each other.

Feeling lost I hold tight to an anchor.
It drags me down.
Drown, or flounder lost and confused?
If I let go what do I have?

Holding on to a man I don't have
Holding on to an emotion that's not real
Holding on to a relationship that's
Stable, 'loving', and unfulfilling.
664 · Aug 2013
Immersed
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
Lost in love,
I'm all alone and drowning.
As I breath in the warm, liquid form.
It's warmth soothes, as my lungs burn for air.

As I replace unrequited love
For air as my life force
My heart ache for what it's not getting.
Lack of love, lack of oxygen.

Not nourishment fills me.
So I live on my love within me which I can't share.
I feed on myself fulfilling my own need,
Aching and loving as one.
651 · Dec 2013
Stolen
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 2*

It's all fun and games
Until someone loses a heart.
Take it from me.
Well, he did.

Great fun, good times
Next thing you know...
You turn around and
Someone's stolen your heart.

I only took my eyes
Off of it for a minute
And it was gone.
Possession is 9 tenths of the law.

The law of attraction.
I liked him,
I love him.
**** didn't see that coming.

Or maybe I did.
I couldn't have stopped it if I had.
Pickpocket skill level 100
Item: 1 heart.
650 · Dec 2013
Inkspiration
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, day 10*

Why can't I write poetry
About things that matter to me?
Or am I really that shallow that all I care about
Is my own feelings of love, passion and loss
Or how tired/busy I am.

I haven't written a single poem about
Feminism, ecology or politics
Or even Star Trek or Doctor Who.
No Red Dwarf, cats or Cat from Red Dwarf.
Heaven knows I've thought about it.

I've thought "there's more to my life than that"
"There's more to me"
"I should write abut such-and-such"
And then sit there
completely blank.

My cat looks at me, sniffing the air
"How could you possibly not write about me?"
And walks off.
His brother lying on the armrest
The world revolves around him in a different way.

Well be more inspiring boys!
Help me out here!
Okay can't blame you
If even Star Trek and Doctor Who aren't doing it.
Plenty of ideas, so few poems
634 · Aug 2013
Nothing
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
Men don't love me, I know that now
I can make them want me,
But not truly desire me.  No matter what they say.
And they definitely don't love me.
They don't need me.

I don't really mean anything to any of them.
I play my role as a *** toy (not *** Goddess)
And it eases those needs.
That'll do.

All I have left are the voices of my lovers inside my head
Saying all those things the lovers never said.
Their comfort destroys my soul.
Their joy makes me cry.

Those voices bring me pain.
But I go back to them again and again,
To hear those beautiful, hurtful words.
'I love you', 'You are everything',
'It's okay, I've got you'.
631 · Aug 2013
Waiting to Stop
Kitty Prr Aug 2013
I have been kicked in the guts so many times.
Not always intentionally.
They probably don't even know.
But it happened none-the-less.

Some might say I should have learned by now.
But 'learned' suggests intellect.
I have the knowledge,
I can see what's coming, but I don't avoid it.

Each time I think I have been battered enough
To not have anything left to be able to go there again.
So now I know no matter how tired and battered I am
I have all this to look forward to again.

It might be someone new,
It might be someone I thought I meant something to,
Reminding me, in someway,
How they didn't really.

I can't numb my heart,
Definitely not long term.
I can't stop wanting, loving (or thinking I do)
I can't stop the intensity of my emotions.

I even want to feel, as much as I dread it.
I love the passion, being alive.
Maybe even the fear of what's to come.
Something like Barbra Streisand's 'Being Alive'.

If only I could feel that
And have someone feel it about me.
The emotions aren't the problem
Being in it alone is.

But that's the way it is,
Always.
Just fifty or so more years
Of this to look forward to.
Kitty Prr Dec 2013
Poem a day, number 17*

Time of peace
Day of rest
In this time of 24/7
Who really gets that?

If you are blessed
With a day or two off
You spend the weeks before
In a manic frenzy

Fitting in shopping
And organising
Around work
And schedules.

This year our Christmas
Will be the 22nd
The one day we all have
Enough time off.

Then Mr will rush out
To work that evening.
I will prepare myself
For work the next day.
Missed my poem a day yesterday so I did two today.  (not sure if it counts but I am going  with it)
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