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Kerdell Dec 2021
In this heart of mine,
I left no space to love me.

In this heart of mine,
I gave to all, even to those who weren’t in need.

In this heart of mine,
So beaten and sore.

This heart of mine,
Knows no warmth, not anymore.
Apr 2021 · 94
letters' to Peanut.
Kerdell Apr 2021
Some days, we pretend to be someone else hoping that maybe its the right person to be for everyone else.

Other days being yourself isn't consistent in giving off the vibe that you once felt.

Really I'm outspoken with thoughts that could make you melt, but

Restraint is sometimes better than playing the cards that we've been dealt.

You have been good to me in ways that I've overlooked, so now I'm fishing for forgiveness, with the first letters as my hook.
Apr 2021 · 760
A lovely cliché
Kerdell Apr 2021
He love you because you listen, i love you because you learn...he loves you because your beautiful i love you because you're bold...he love you because you kept his secrets, i love you because you told. He loves the pain you accept, i give love till you unfold, he tears your heart apart, i collect the pieces and make them whole. He imprisons you with lies and promises, i remove loves' blindfold. I'd die before he---BANG....there goes another Hero, added to loves' death toll.
Just having  fun with my thoughts.
Apr 2021 · 189
Love, Conservatively.
Kerdell Apr 2021
If I had died to save you, would you care?
If I wanted the last drop of your love, would you share?
Had I offered a day in my shoe, would you wear?
Let's say I returned the pain you gave, could your bare?

Have you ever cried so hard and not shed a tear?
Shivering in the warmth of my sheets because you're not here.
Suffocating together but would rather die with you near,
Now we no longer talk and it grinds my gear,
Because you PROMISED that no matter what, you'd always be there.

Isn't it tragic how the life we dreamt about isn't there,
No goosebumps, no blushing, not even a dull spark in the air.
Our love seems shattered, stained and beyond repair,
Didn't see it coming, I loved blindly, unaware.

I gave my soul for you in hope that my heart, you'd spare,
Now you got me kneeling, religiously running to GOD in prayer.
Praying that, some day soon, this pain just disappears
So that I can be happy, at peace and love again, without fear.
Jul 2019 · 150
Her dying wish
Kerdell Jul 2019
As the air flowed through the room, emotions filled each crevice, the color stained walls seemed gray, shadows of sorrow grew where the lights died, the distinct and loud sound of her inner drums drowned the silence which was slowly creeping out.
This was the moment;
Her pain was felt.
Mar 2019 · 151
Love Died Here.
Kerdell Mar 2019
“ nothing that last forever is real, real always grows sick, withers and die some day”
Jul 2016 · 312
Untitled
Kerdell Jul 2016
Just like the candle, my light die sometimes.
Constructive criticism welcomed.
Jan 2016 · 398
Painted Shell (unfinished)
Kerdell Jan 2016
Your mask fits well. Almost seamless, hiding the cracks that you thought made you seem-less in his eyes. The critique of a million tongues carried no voice , all but one. One with a voice so agonizing , so torturous so raw but tolerable- under the mask. You whisper your pain in the winds while drying your tears in the silk of the morning sun.
It's only a rough cut..should have the final within a few days or more...you're honest critique is welcomed :)
May 2015 · 646
Optional maybe?
Kerdell May 2015
People never listen to your noise, But could always hear your silence!
Mar 2015 · 28.2k
Lust
Kerdell Mar 2015
Lust or lost in the idea of wanting something I don't need... I can't breathe without it...I greed..  I crave.... Hmmm... Lust.....I squeeze so hard ..dust..it turns.. I yearn to have it.... Want but don't need.... share never.. A hot cold sweat.. Maybe a fever. Lust.....it's changing me...Help
Feb 2015 · 726
Talking Mirrors
Kerdell Feb 2015
I SEE YOU! Hiding behind that beautiful excuse of a smile, craving attention and importance, voicelessy crying for help. I see, YOU! Running after shadows of love. Soul tired, hopes up, heart torn, mind...Lost... I see you. Powerless in your own world, chained to the comfort of being wanted and not needed, comfortable. Not happy... I see you. A thousand scars telling the story of a battle; yet to win... I saw you. Who am I? I am You.
Funny how i actually wrote this while looking in a mirror...hahaha
Feb 2015 · 787
Lost?
Kerdell Feb 2015
All that I seek is somewhere
Somewhere is all that I seek
Feb 2015 · 490
Untitled
Kerdell Feb 2015
We are all guilty of trying to mirror the love we see
Not sharing the love we know
Could love still be called 'true'
Make your own sense of this
Feb 2015 · 360
Lady Of The Night
Kerdell Feb 2015
There's someone in my bed,
the image is blurry, so i can't quite tell
i'm leaning over hoping to get a smell, Ooh!
the Moet and lavender is strong
The drums inside my head, so loud,
Where was i last night? Did i do wrong?
the draft creeping between my legs through my sheets
reached out my hands felt i had nothing on beneath.
Oh my! my manhood feels sore and my back burns like i fell in cactus's
the uncertainty of my situation was becoming more clear
but never before my bed was something i share.

feeling uneasy and strange
lying in bed with someone but can't remember their name
or who it is.
ciphering through my memories.
Ah! then it clicked, I remembered why they were still here
I sought my billfold, paid my dues
Then.
The someone disappeared.
#*** #short
Feb 2015 · 330
Imperfect Perfection!
Kerdell Feb 2015
intoxicating my mind, are your lies, Tantalizing my thoughts like... honey on my taste buds. Pulling me apart bit by bit, but painlessly. Painlessly...numb was i, needing to be loved and cared for, thrown out in the cold, naked.... Naked and lost praying for us to work rather than a way... home?...To who? Dreaming more than i live just to blind myself of this, somewhat, ****** up thought of being without you. But I ******* hate you!! But i love you... Being trapped in a place with no walls, addicted to your poisonous love and enslaved by your promises...feeling so uncomfortable yet happy. Because you said 'you love us'.... Us? sounds like hell huh? but only to those who don't understand what it means to love a TRUE human and not true love. Not true love. If we walk away from our problems, we won't pass them, so i'll stay and we'll get stronger. Not for today or tomorrow... BUT FOREVER!!!
I'm an amateur writer so pardon me if it does not capture you! :/

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