I've never really been homeless
but I lived right next door forever and ever
or so it seems
I've never been hopeless
but I've seen my light
go dim for a while
as I while away
without any dreams
I've never really been lifeless but I've had times
I could have lived
a little bit more
I never really felt worthless
but I've had those times
I felt like my life could have
had a bit more in store
never have I been homeless
so I have no idea... how
it really must feel
even though ...oh ohhhoh
I always lived soohohhhoh close
to that edge-  it's not
the same....
    because
it's not real...so how
do you feel?

I can't say that I don't care
That I fell into disrepair
but it seems that I am there
and it really really is nowhere
nowhere that  I want to be
holds no views I want to see
I need to find a remedy
I am sick and I am tired
of this life in which I am mired
I don't have to be admired
just want to have a voice for choice
is all I have ever desired
choose the way you want to live
choose how much of you..
... you want to give
don't try to always relive those parts  parts of you....
... that you decided to give.... away
at last
to the past
I can't say that I don't care
that I once fell into..... disrepair!

I paused to stare
across
-the void of emptiness
where I have tossed
so many promises that I
have made
all the memories and people
that time will fade
then the fog always seems
to appear
obscuring all there
that were just here
pushing me to move along
telling me that I was
some how wrong
To even give the past a chance  even taking a single glance and what do I do
I'll let life intervene
rise up and come between
start slowly shrinking
to suddenly disappear
and then I walk on past
the empty
shadow that I cast
if I could I separate myself
from all those memory traps
Where I always seem to fall
I find that I cannot help myself  always I seem to pause
to peer across the distance void where I've always lied decried  , as, as full of emptyness
when I truly knew
exactly what it is that I see
every single one of those
scattered memories
Like  mausoleums
inviting me to come on In ,,
While inside my head
Voices telling me to move on
before I release some  inner peace
Soothing out all the inner pain and ever-present nerve
  So away I go to avoid
Any  piece of mind
I don't believe I yet deserve.

Stopping by the grammer store
I  bought a few pronoun bars to strengthen up my descriptabilities
A variety of verbs
To alter the activities
My proclivities ....
...in danger
of being denounced
renounced by pronounced
Excommunication exultation
Forming on the vestigages of
The voice once possessed
Now seemingly at rest
Unsuitably impressed by
The nothingness of
any redressed grievance
When sentenced to question
Ones own viability ...
reliability or inspirability
Without pardon ...
I left with a full bag
of prepositions as i wandered and wound my way  home  ...
Never knowing of the hole
Where in my wake
i left a trail behind me during
before and after ,up against
Over and through ,near ,for among and between here and there i lost them all but one
Hanging half out without knowing where at

Sometimes I fear that our only hope
is those who can are extending the rope
to see how far the degradation exists
while keeping copious and up to date lists