I sold my soul for pocket change,
I thought it would make me happy.
I betrayed the ones who loved me,
I've always been against them.

I'm destructive to no end,
Drinking until I'm angry.
Gambling until I'm broke.
Screaming at friends until I'm lonely.

I push away anyone who wants to help me,
Their pity parties push down my pride.
Tears are my true friends,
Sore eyes and broken hearts are my allies.

I'd like to think I had a tragic backstory,
Something I could point to or blame.
Though I know the truth,
If my story had ever been tragic,
The problem began with me.

We drank beers till it got late
Until it got a little early
Talking about things that we hate
We slept on the couch with the tv on
Until everyone got up and we had to go by 8:00
In the van, sleeping in the back
The windows down, opened by a crack.

I climbed in the back of your window
You broke my desk past the APT's curfew
I led you out, we began to shout
"This is the life is about!"
We lost track of time, with $12 Wine
By 4:00 we were totally *******
We carried each other back to your place
We stumbled over the cat sleeping on the carpet
Didn't realize it until it departed,
Out from under our feet right into a fixture
It crashed and broke a bottle of liquor.
I don't care what you think, we know how to have fun,
We make out and drink, until we see the sun,
Retreat to the fire escape to the roof and pass out until 1:00.  

I don't know what I'd do
I don't know what I'd say
Without someone like you
To be in the fray
When I get in a fight
When I'm drunk in the night
You'd help me see this through
I need someone like you.

I want to get into a fight and lose.
I want to go to a bar and get rejected.
I want to live on the streets and struggle just to see the next day.
I want to take risks that will be my ultimate downfall.
I want to lose, knowing it can't be worse than this.
I want to feel as bad as my heart aches.

Fear not little one,
Everyone has a purpose.
How quaint you must feel,
Like destiny ripping at your wired circuits,
Looking for meaning.
Looking for purpose.

It's not just you,
We're all wired that way.
Don't lose heart,
Your work, though minimal, has purpose.

Know that there is meaning in everything we do,
For there is a master plan, working itself out.
Even if it seems useless, faint, or unimportant,
Don't lose hope,
Do not faulter,
Don't stop or stutter,
You do more than pass the butter.