The pain I feel every time I see you with someone else
The sorrow I feel when you get close to them
The jealousy raging when you flirt with them
The untold feelings for you, eating away at my heart.

The uneasy feeling when I'm around you
The want to cry in front of you to make sure you would stay with me
The feeling I get in my stomach when I see you
The need to have you, controlling my mind.

The pure joy I feel when I see you
The genuine smile you give off when you laugh
The silly things we do together when were by ourselves
The love I have for you, controlling me.

The desire to confess my love to you
The fear of rejection and abandonment
The words I want to hear from you
The words are 'I love you too.'

breathe
breathe
you just have to breathe
its simple, even babies can do it
so why cant you?
a string tightens around your neck
heart racing,
breath scarce
you dart your hands up
to reieve the pain
yet, where is the rope?
there is none
for it is your own mind
tightening your hair round your neck
yet your hair is draped across your shoulders
not a piece misplaced
your throat on fire
spine tingling
head spinning
trying to just
breathe

open your mouth
call for help
and water spills in
yet your nowhere near water
your mind, its playing even more games
your mind is an assassin
plotting against you
trying to **** you
you let your hands rest
the fingers far beyond numb
and the worst happens:
someone sees you, drowning in air
comes up to you
asks the three words you dread the most
"are you okay?"

you swallow, seeing stars
faintly shake your head
eyes fuzzy, in and out of focus
but somehow
as your hair tightens its grip
and the water trickles into your lungs
you mutter, stutter
"i'm fine" and mannage
with blue lips
purple skin
and red, tear filled eyes
to give a smile
full toothed
praying for this to convince them
that you infact are
even though your drowning

the person nods, patting a shoulder
flashing a smile
and moves on
so you can drown in peace
struggling to breathe
your lungs full of water
throat on fire
tighter than ever
you can feel your hands now
you look down and see your shaking
hands clenched
knuckles white
palms bleeding
but you keep your head up
smile on
your pretty purple face
beautiful blue lips in all
and keep walking
as you turn from dying to dead
a walking corpse.

"What are you?" might be asked
But no one will ever know.
For if I trust you enough
My love for you will grow.
Because, dear, I live in the sea
Something no one should show.

So I dress up in a gown and mask,
Letting the sea breeze blow,
Yet, you never came my love
So I shall let my secret go.
Into the sea I jump
As you walk down the path to me
Watching as I flash before your eyes,
Becoming oh so free.
Running-screaming- you call my name
But I cannot hear -- oh, how far down must I be?

That day I lost a lover to land
And she, her lover by sea.