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i have this bad habit
where i stress myself out
over stupid things
to the point where i cry
and it's always on days
that already were awful
anyway... trees by twenty one pilots and tolerate it by taylor swift are really good songs to cry and sing in the car

also i don't even know why today ****** in the first place it just kind of did probably because it's thursday
snow melts
day become longer
sun sets later
sun rises early
spring is around the corner
and i'm slowly getting better
as the weather gets warmer
tbh i've had a rough time recently but i think i'm getting better
the good thing
about having a bad day
is that the sun always sets
and when the sun rises
in the morning
you get a chance
to start over
well you know i'm slowly getting there (also this is irrelevant but I got to roll the windows down driving home from school today because it was 55 degrees instead of -23 like it was for the past 2 weeks)
Karly Codr Feb 19
a really bad habit to get into
is retail therapy
you know, buying things
when your mental health *****?
well i've been stuck in that habit
for a while
and today after school
i went and spent sixty dollars
on things that i didn't even need
at least the scrunchies that i got were cute. oh and i got some more pens that i don't even need anyway because i have plenty. also i don't know why i was so willing to spend that much when i need to get fabric for a pair of pajama pants that I'm gonna make and fabric is expensive as hell
Karly Codr Feb 18
i try not to get my hopes up
for something
that could never happen
but no matter how many times
i tell myself
that i can't get my hopes up
i do
and i end up getting disappointed
every time
there was a possibility that i could get a full ride scholarship to the school that I've been wanting to go to for at least 3 years, but I didn't get it and now i'm disappointed in myself because even though it wasn't my decision, i didn't do good enough to get the scholarship
Karly Codr Feb 17
thick loose curls
fall to the mat on the floor
i haven't had a real haircut
in three years
i would always get anxious
and cut hair off myself
because something happened
or i would get worried about something
and feel the need to cut my hair
and I could never bring myself
to get it cut by a professional
it was so uneven
so even though
i only got 7 inches cut off today
i feel like i'm starting
to know myself again
7 inches might seem like a lot but my hair was at least 2 feet long so 7 inches wasn't a lot considering how uneven it was at the ends and how unevenly layered it was so anywayyyy

i know that getting a haircut may not seem like that big of a deal but like it really was and i'm really proud of myself because i've finally done something that i've been scared of doing because of what my hair looked like. I could never wear it without it being in a ponytail because of how uneven it was and the person who cut my hair didn't say anything about it, she just cut it off it feels like a weight lifted of my shoulders because i can wear my hair loose again i'm like really proud of myself (this was long sorry it needed an explanation)
Karly Codr Feb 10
have you ever tried
to open a car door
and get in the car
at the same time
because i tried to do that tonight
and smacked my face into the door
after work
so now my eye is swollen
and probably brusied
so that's fun
my face hurts (insert laughing/crying emoji here)
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