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Kaylee L Sep 2017
I used to hit to get high or hit to get by.
**** I'd hit just to lie next to another lie just to feel my next cry and wonder if it hurt to die.

I used to hit to get high or hit to get by. That love was where my motivation lied. I wasn't looking for a single love but multiple feelings of maybe appreciation or the approximation of someone wanting my affection or attention.

I used to hit to get high or hit to get by.
3 4 5 people in and out of my room never seeing the naked truth or naked you that one who said loved should see. All I knew is I wanted to be what they need and who they see without the loyalty.

I used to hit to get high or hit to get by.
The rush was amazing. The divide was encasing as the sin and lies overwhelmed and the curtain started raising...

I used to hit to get high or hit to get by.

I saw and sobered. Not from love but the addiction itself. I sobered from the urge that made me want more, in fact this love I felt was more in depth. In fact it crept and wept sweet tears and happiness. All I wanted was the one; I saddened less. I was what she needed along with the loyalty. I asked about her needs and wants and acted accordingly.

I used to hit to get high or hit to get by but now I comply to loves law. Abide in her soul. A love and devotion I am no longer able to control. Our love is almost story tale told. I no longer wait for another to unfold.
Kaylee L Feb 2017
I've Always had a Love for words
but when I try to write about you, I'm at a lack thereof

You Make a poet go quiet
I'm Used to my mind being so loud
But now I Flourish in *silence
Kaylee L Nov 2016
It's amazing how we don't wear our mental scars on our visible skin but if you look hard enough you can still see them.
It's amazing how once you see them, if you touch them you can feel them, not in a physical sense like feel the cut but in a physical sense where you can feel the pain
and It's crazy because I look at your scars and compare mine and they look the same and I know the pain and it's really a shame that we're both victim to this game and there's so many to blame and all I want to do is heal yours and soothe the soreness when we both have open wounds yet they're all flawless and make us who we are and gorgeous and baby I just want you to know this
I'm sorry for the pain you've endured and your scars I want to kiss so I kiss your head and tell you that I love you.
Your place is your place and it's right here in my heart. You have every right to be upset if I do wrong, though, I promise not to tear you apart. I promise to put you back together from your previous falls and how those scars remain to this day but I promise I won't take advantage of your mental pain and I'll never let you slip away or bring upon you rain.
I promise you with me, it's okay, and it might not be today but I'll heal all and keep you safe, promise to leave those scars shut and never add to your collection and keep those scars a memory which you never recollect on.
Kaylee L Oct 2016
Wrapped around her finger
Metaphorically and physically
The way she looks in my eyes
Heavy breaths exhaling desire
Light reflects off the sweat on our skin
I take a hit off your hips
Inhale your passion
Trace your curves with the tips of my lips
Grip your throat delaying your breaths
A sudden gasp as I explore your love

Follow me into ecstasy
Kaylee L Oct 2016
i try to keep myself humble at all times. Although my insecurities eat me alive some times. i could have all the confidence in the world and have it drain instantly at the sight of someone/something.

I try to remind myself that everything i ever wanted could be taken away by a cute lightskin ***** with a fade

I try to remind myself about how my girl and i even came. That it very well could happen to me. How easily a cute white girl came and took someones world away from them and claimed it as theirs.

I try to remind myself that no matter how good things are, it could disappear because the cutest white boy could easily steal my sunshine.

I try to remind myself that all i was was a side piece until i smooth talked my way into her heart and put stars in her sky when she asked me why i wanted her.

i try to remind myself that any cute lightskin ***** with a fade can do the same.
Any cute white girl can take my place.
and even the cutest white boy can be her new saving grace.

I still try to hide behind a false happy and act unbothered like my mind doesnt wander back to the hell i kept myself in in the past years. that cute white boy was me at one point. that cute white girl was me at one point. That cute lightskin ***** with a fade started all this **** inside me about the insecurities i posses and why ill never feel secure in a relationship.

I try to remind myself to never let my wall down. How i took from them, they can take from me. I don't see myself as much and that's why i am so guarded cause i feel as though it will happen. That cute white boy came through the drive thru to tell you what i tell you hourly and you felt the need to let me know in those words. I know you're beautiful. The world knows it too. i just want to be the only beautiful and cute to you.
Kaylee L Oct 2016
Sober night
Coldest life
Can't light the pipe
It's only right

Take a shot for me
Kaylee L Aug 2016
If I call you will you still answer?
I found myself wanting to cry numerous times today and I don't know who to send my prayers to.
Baby you're a prayer too.
You're a beautiful soul
Do you know what you're getting into do you know who I am? What we can do?
If you're down im down hold my hand and we will walk right through
All the judgement and despair are you ready cause I don't care.
I can't fake shake or try to get you to relate to the feelings I got for you
I'm really all about you.

I'm not sure who you been with before and what hurt has been put on your heart or more
I'm not trying to replace a home you once had but I promise I'll be the best one that you've had.
Believe every word I say for I'll never lie to you.
When I tell you I'm yours, I'm yours. I'll never lie to you.
I'll abide in you.
Let me get inside of you.
Your mental not your jeans your heart is what I mean our love will be serene and clean more like a dream it seems , I'll never leave please believe

Im falling for you. Stumbling over your words like curbs. I haven't put my hands out in front of me yet.
If I fall will you catch me? Gentle landing no plea
Agree to clean the debris don't leave or thieve
We've achieved in disbelief all that we can be in our beautiful ****** up reality

If I told you I loved you how would you react. Every time I think of it I get anxiety attacked. My hearts so compact I forget what it lacks when it's cracked and when I look at you it retracts and counteracts and leaves me in disbelief that one day you might love me. That today I might love you. I know this seems out of the blue but I'd rather be true and honest like I promised.
I'll keep my promise. All of them. Honest.
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