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2.9k · Dec 2010
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
Twas the night before Festivus
so what of the restofus
is this just George's Holiday?

We all have our grievances
and some may have strengths
but for others it is just one more day.

The airing of grievance does dinner adorn
let's gripe at the world
giving each one his turn.

In so many ways disappointment you bring
and of your shortcomings
all now we shall sing.

When dinner is done
dad wrestles each one
till we pin dear old dad to the floor.

For feats of great strength
are witnessed at length
as is custom from now ever more.

And what of the tree? I sent ours a packing
just a shiny new pole
I find tinsel distracting.

Then it is stories of events that I spin
of how Festivus Miracles
reunited old friends.

It comes once a year bringing way too much fuss
the common man's Holiday
for the restofus, it's called Festivus.
2.2k · Feb 2011
For Whom the Phone Rings
Karl Stewart Feb 2011
No man is disconnected,
Alone by himself.
Each has a cell phone,
A part of the network.
If a tweet be lost into the ether,
Twitter is the less.
As well as if an update were.
As well as if a Facebook page of thine own
Or of thine friend's status were.
Each man's blog informs me,
For I am involved in social networking.
Therefore, text not to know
For whom the phone rings,
It rings for thee.
spin off from:
For Whom the Bell Tolls
(No man is an island) by John Donne
1.9k · Dec 2010
Let It Go
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
sometimes you need to kick ****
and sometimes you need to let it go
sometimes you just want to kick ****
but you usually let it go
it doesnt seem to pay
kicking **** these days
it's a shame too
because sometimes
it just seems like the right thing to do
but for now
i think i'll let it go.
1.8k · Sep 2010
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
!is it me?
mirror to mirror
reflection of reflection
self same to same self
reflection of reflection
mirror to mirror
?me it is!
front to back to front
read it how you like
1.8k · Sep 2010
Fridge From Hell
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
all that glitters is not gold
and all that's fuzzy is not mold
I should not eat, I'm pretty sure
things from the fridge that have grown fur

once a month it gets cleaned out
once a month i must give shout
to all who use this fridge of mine
they think that milk will age like wine

but it does not I'm here to say
is the smell pleasant? I say nay nay
with curds aplenty and sour smell
just one more thing in this fridge from hell.

the ham i see it is not new
it has rainbows of green and blue
the orange juice fizzes when opened up
is that brown stuff really ketchup

and in the back behind a bowl
a swelled up box, that's very old
its sides have bulged as it has swelled
I'm afraid to look in this fridge from hell
1.7k · Nov 2010
Seeing Deeply
Karl Stewart Nov 2010
love is only for giving
it cannot be held
it will elude you if you try
but give it and it returns tenfold
love is like reflections
reflections go on forever
when i was a little kid
i used to go into my grandmother's bedroom
where there were two mirrors
and i would try to count the reflections
i knew they went on forever
but i could never get there
it was mind boggling to me
i thought if i stood just right
got at the right angle
i could see the end
but i never could
now i love someone
and in them i see reflections
i see love coming back to me
and it goes on forever
i finally found out
how to see deeply
it is by feeling deeply
1.6k · Nov 2010
Adult Supervision
Karl Stewart Nov 2010
in my head there is a playground
a place i fool around
but leave me there without a care
and in trouble, i'll be found

my mind it thinks so many thoughts
both near and far they are
sometimes it stays right here at home
and sometimes wanders far

sometimes i get in trouble
much to my own derision
i should not be  in here alone
without some supervision

adult supervision is what i need
when with my thoughts alone
without direction i will go
to places not condoned

so help me God from up above
i need you here with me
and in my weakness, you'll be strong
my strength will come from thee

you are my father, i am your child
protect me from these visions
i depend on you for all i do
my adult supervision
for Luis
1.6k · Sep 2010
Prisoner of Attitude
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
If only I had listened
when told I should cheer up
I would not be imprisoned
In this attitude that *****

happiness is ninetyfive percent mental
I guess I'm almost there
I've been called totally depressed
so I have five percent to spare

I share with you all of my thoughts
so I'm not the only one
to be mired in these ruts
I want to share the fun

they say misery loves company
so why am I alone
i gripe and moan and I complain
i drink until i'm ******

And when I find some lucky person
who is dumb enough to listen
I drag them down with my long frown
and share with them my prison
1.5k · Sep 2010
This Funny Business
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
I'm in this funny business
Where emails I do send
Then sit and wait to learn my fate
Have I made a friend

And if they call I do my thing
And see if they agree
I tell them all about myself
And how this thing's for me

If it's for them
Then we both win
We start out on our quest
For in this funny business
Strangers are our guests

We tell them of the business
And how it makes you rich
Sometimes they say its not for them
And that is such a *****

But freedom's not for every one
And this is true today
They have to want it for themselves
And not for what you say

You pull that rope if they hold on
And bring them to the fold
But push that rope and off they run
The frustration gets real old

You cannot want enough for both
They need their own belief
But when they want the same thing too
You feel as though relieved

You move along at your own pace
You learn and grow and thrive
And in the end you've made some friends
Who are healthy, wealthy, and wise.
1.5k · Nov 2010
Hamlet for Today
Karl Stewart Nov 2010
Like most modern day workers, Hamlet enters the break room and immediately starts to complain...

Ah, to be, anywhere else indeed, that is the question
whether it is nobler in the mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of the office and its misfortune
or by running away to a place of reverie
avoid them?  To quit; to work no more;
and by work to say we slave;
the heart-ache and a thousand bills,
the debt of life accumulates, and must be paid,
perchance to pay, ay, there's the rub
for in our solitude what income may we gather,
When we have shuffled off this workman's toil?
Must give us pause, there's the respect
That makes calamity of so long a respite.
For who would bear the whips and chains of work,
the owner's wrong, the supervisor's derision,
the pangs of bonuses lost, of pay grade frozen,
the arrogance of management and the spurns
that advancement not to unworthy gives,
When we ourselves might our fortunes make,
with hands bare? who would burdens bear,
to toil and strive under heavy load,
but the dread of something after employment,
the undiscover'd freedom from wealth springs,
sojourn not, confounding the mind,
and makes us rather bear the jobs we have,
than strike out on quests we know not of?
Thus circumstance does make cowards of us all;
and thus the common site of current workplace
is cast in hues of thoughts depressed,
and ventures of great risk and merit
with this in mind are cast aside,
and lose the force of momentum. Resist now!
the multitude of coworkers, in their mockery
be all my folly remember'd.
1.4k · Feb 2011
Turtleflies n Toenails
Karl Stewart Feb 2011
high up in the jubjub tree
the turtlefly hangs all day
wings made of shell give blazing speed
he flits where ever he may

unconcerned of falling down
he flies from branch to branch
and if he misses his perch just once
he bounces when he lands

but missing twice is not so nice
unless he spreads his wings
for bouncing is so ******* him
a cracked shell really stings

he makes his nest on fork-ed branch
and lines it all with fur
and decorates his jubjub tree
then sits and waits for her

his mate you see is not like he
but rather large indeed
she is the three-toed elephant
and can barely climb his tree

upon her back he lands so soft
she barely knows he's there
he walks up front to her great head
and never moves a hair

so when she hears his tiny voice
whispered in her ear
she thinks it is a thought of hers
and has not a thing to fear

he says come up and sit right here
upon our wedding bed
if only you would do as asked
I'd paint your toenails red

so up the tree she begins to climb
with visions in her head
of wedding bells and turtlefly shells
and toenails bright and red

forgot did she since she was three
she's had a fear of height
and grasping branches with her toes
she climbs up in the night

in the morning with sun's first light
the jubjub tree looks bare
with toes of red, she blends right in
you cannot tell she's there

her toes you see, resemble three
bright cherries in a row
unless she moves her ponderous bulk
the elephant does not show

she hides up in the jubjub tree
while turtlefly flits around
she holds so tight that from day one
she never goes to ground

so if you see, those cherries three
can you trust your eyes
is it cherries in the tree
or the elephant in disguise
1.4k · Sep 2010
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
Let's get together
find a common ground
let's get together
with our shared likes found

We always can agree
on one or two or more
things most people argue
are things we both adore

We like the things each other likes
and hate the same things too
and when the world is closing in
it's always me and you

We really stick together
like mud on pants of white
life tries to pry us both apart
but we hardly ever to fight

Cuz we are bonded at the hip
together we shall go
through life’s trials and traumas
I count on you, you know

If ever comes a day
when parting we must do
we will hold each other dear
my heart I give to you

Best Friends Forever
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
In twilly frills on noobly's gump
the framly is known as Wally Frump.
And Wally feeds the grimmly worm
bits of scritch and crumbly kirm.

the grimmly worm was quite a find
Wally almost ate him but changed his mind
now grimmly worm's a pet of his
so too grimmly's cousin liz.

lizzy slithers smear and drag
with liquid eyes of black nishcrag
leaving trails along the walk
of slimy glosh that smells like plock

framlies are a quirky lot
with mogly toes and breath so hot.
beware of Wally's heated breath
where one small wiff means certain death

so when you enter twilly frills
on noobly's gump among the hills
beware of Wally's breath so warm
of lizzy's slime and the grimmly worm
1.2k · Aug 2010
Ever Notice?
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
Ever notice,
Email never arrives,
At the time it says it did?
Maybe they don't really want you to know?

Ever notice,
Your Pc time,
Never matches your watch?
Is it really all relative?

Ever notice,
Minutes left to process,
Don't always count Down?
Are they saying it will take longer than we first thought?

Ever notice,
You need a child in the house,
To help program the time in your appliances?
Where did they learn how?

Ever notice,
Adults cant seem to remove,
Child proof lids?
Why can children?

Ever notice,
How we are stressed out,
But the dog just sits there licking himself?
Does he know something we don't?

Ever notice,
they put a switch on lighters,
to prevent you from lighting them?
Maybe we're not supposed to use them?

Ever notice,
They put throw away lids,
On returnable bottles?
Would they be oxymoronic containers?

Ever notice,
The car breaks down,
Right after the warrantee runs out?
How do they engineer that?

Ever notice,
When you unsubscribe from spam,
They always send one more email,
telling you  you unsubscribed?

Ever notice,
I say Ever Notice a lot?
Until now,
I never noticed.
1.2k · Mar 2012
Cross Eyed Raspberries
Karl Stewart Mar 2012
Cross eyed raspberries
a signal for truce

he's breathing my air!
as I hyperventilated

but she never suffocated
so I figure she was wrong

her air was her air
even if she didn't know it

It was still fun trying
picking on her was great sport

fighting with my sister
was a hobby for me

being the only boy gave me advantage
I was never the one blamed

and if I acted hurt
she always got in trouble

it wasn't really fair
but she was bigger than me

I loved relentless picking
but when we each had had enough

cross eyed raspberries is what we blew
a signal for truce
1.2k · Feb 2011
Calls in the Night
Karl Stewart Feb 2011
in the evening as shadows come out from hiding
the whippoorwill calls in the night
ethereal haunting cries of loneliness
do I project? perhaps it's just a bird
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
I am not ****** all the time
sometimes I'm bright and gay
I am not always feeling down
at least not every day

Sometimes I wear a great big smile
sometimes I have a frown
sometimes I'm feeling really good
sometimes I'm really down

So if you see my smiling face
approach me if you dare
but **** me off and you will watch
as I yank off half your hair

I'll hit you like a big buzz saw
I'll chew and spit you out
so don't approach on my bad days
days when I sit and pout
I'll have to work on a happy version of this.
1.2k · Sep 2011
Karl Stewart Sep 2011
unconsummated love,
insistent yet unquenched.
there is a bitter sweetness
that is at once wonderful and
connected as we are
by the stuff thoughts are made of.
touching hearts that remain solitary,
fleeting yet substantial, sometimes
it is more real than reality.
holding on too tight, I loosen
my grip to find...
everything and nothing.
1.1k · Jul 2011
Those Dolls
Karl Stewart Jul 2011
Mother In Law has a huge collection of dolls (creeps me out)

Those dolls,
always watching me
with their beedy little eyes
following me where ever I go
they are in every room
I can't get away from them
they sit there with smug looks
those dolls
always watching me
creeps me out
I swear I saw one turn its head
why does she have this infernal collection
I think she is out to get me
I am quite sure of it
she even has a pair of them in the guest bath
sitting there drinking tea
both of them strategically placed
so they can watch me
always watching me
those dolls
creeps me out

the life sized ones are bad enough
but she has dozens of little ones
every time i visit my mother-in-law
they are someplace else
and yet, I have never seen her move them
does she even know they moved?
they follow me
and not just with their eyes
they follow me
room to room
place to place
and they all smile
oh you can't always see it
but I can tell
I am not paranoid
I am quite sure they are out to get me
they talk amongst themselves
i swear I have heard murmers when alone
I can't stand being alone in that house
the constant rustling
she must hear it
why can't she hear it
I am not crazy
I can't be crazy
can I

when alone
i think one of them tries to talk to me
it is on the edges of consciousness but it is there
just barely audible
i cant believe no one else hears it
what was that
did you hear it
tell me you heard it
i am not crazy
I can't be crazy
can i
those dolls
always watching me
creeps me out
1.1k · Oct 2010
Strong to the Finish
Karl Stewart Oct 2010
running in place
with a frown on my face
do you think it would help keep me trim

I know one thing for sure
as I squeeze through the door
I don't want to go to the gymn

I won't say im lazy
but some say I'm crazy
I do not like to workout

sitting on my duff
is usually enough
to thoroughly wear myself out

I walk down the halls
and stare at the walls
and then I must sit for a spell

my muscles and tone
have shrunk to the bone
my strength has gone straight to hell

and work as i may
this weakness still stays
I cannot seem to get strong

if I had my druthers
I would blame all others
is that really so wrong

I eat the wrong things
like fried chicken wings
and soda and chips and some pie

I truly love food
and when in the mood
I even eat onions and cry

I must now behave
for my life to be saved
to this world I wont say goodbye

I must eat my spinach
to be strong to the finish
just like my hero popeye
Karl Stewart Oct 2010

it should have been her little brother
who's dead body she was dragging
after just having killed him
and eaten his heart
blood still fresh on her lips
gore and flesh clinging to her fingernails
Instead it was just her little rag doll
torn and tattered
from years of too much loving
blood simulated with the lipstick
she found in her mommy's drawer
amazing how gory looking
spaghetti can be when hanging
from the shirt of an old rag doll
who knew where this new game would lead
a game she quickly became addicted to
in those quiet moments when all alone
times where she would re-enact heinous acts
only imagined in her fertile little mind
which would not have been bad, in and of itself
if only she had left the neighbor's cat alone
but she bares the scars of that misadventure
cats not going quietly, armed as they are
brother had better watch his back
the cat was just a warm up
a way to try out thoughts, hone skills
others would make her list
of not always failed experiments
heaven help the birds
that were too slow to evade her traps
and neighbors started complaining
of pets gone missing, no evidence at all
if you don't count the freshly turned earth
in her small backyard
a quiet neighborhood, really
peaceful in fact
little did they know
how much peace was being disturbed
in the little girl's basement
normally a sanctuary for children
who have free run of an overly large house.
not so this one, more like a mortuary
a collection of improvised instruments
of pain, mutilation, disection
experimentation, torture
and even death
it should have been her little brother
that she was dragging
all his teasing, all those years
brothers can be so cruel
but now there may be a way
to exact revenge
not that what he did was so out of the ordinary
I mean what little brother hasn't
pulled his sister's hair, or
called her names
but does this justify the plans
being spawned in her twisted little mind
of how she will lure him to the basement
trick him with a promise of some treat
stolen as she often does from mother's pantry
how she will tie him up and gag him
how she will take delight watching the terror in his eyes
as she approaches him, tool in hand
which one will she start with...
just then the alarm goes off
oh look, it is time to get up
and get ready for school
she loves school
especially the new creative writing class
she can hardly wait to get started
on the Halloween assignment
been dreaming about it all night.
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
Walking into the room
Not a word says he
With hood on his head
Can he actually see

He moves real slow
With deliberate intent
His energy conserved
His time well spent

While waiting his action
I think my last thoughts
I wish I'd done better
I should not have been caught

I'm innocent i swear
I did not do it
He's heard that before
He still just keeps to it

He knots the rope
It fits round my neck
I'll go for a swing
Why not what the heck

This moment's repeating
He's tying the knot
He's slipping it over
He did that I thought

The trap door feels solid
I hope it stays shut
I hope it malfunctions
I hope i stay put

In all of my years
I thought me so wise
I never thought this
would be my demise

To swing from a rope
and hang till I'm dead
please give me a gun
I'll aim at my head

I'll go any way
I'll go with great speed
don't end it like this
Please please there's no need

I hate that **** rope
as it slips o'er my head
time keeps repeating
So why aren't I dead

It takes way too long
they want me to speak
I don't have any words
I can't even squeak

My courage has left me
I face all my fears
My knees they buckle
My eyes full of tears

But show me no mercy
this deed you must do
Give me the rope
and lets see this thing through

Now hanging for crimes
Not committed by me
The torture has ended
At last I am free.
Not sure where this one came from...I just wrote it down.
885 · Dec 2010
Life Is Good
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
sun is up
though hard to tell
light fog hanging low
looking out over the water
I see waves gently lapping
the rocks of the jetty
sitting, listening, being
enjoying the sights and sounds
of life on the waterfront
closing my eyes
i can hear the waves
slowly advancing and retreating
the wind blowing rigging
on the boats moored nearby
the pitiful cries of gulls
looking for a scrap to eat
barking from the sea lions
laying on the buoy
damp chill
too cool for shirtsleeves
salt smell in the air
occasional odor of fish
wind is freshening
boat is rocking
life is good
846 · Sep 2010
I Am Not Finished
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
I am not finished,
just a work in progress.
It is all I will ever be.
Ever changing, ever growing.
Developing, evolving,
for better maybe for worse.
I am not done.
This is not what I want to be.
I am what I am,
but for a moment.
Then I am something else.
I can hardly tell, myself,
what I might become.
But becoming is what I am.
Ever changing, ever growing.
With my dying breath,
I will say,
but I am not finished.
828 · Dec 2010
For Lack of Support
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
I could not wait
the day had grown near
it was time to get started
junior high school was here

I was real tuff stuff
big in my own eyes
till the day came
to get school supplies

my mother was saying
while approaching the door
I think we'll go shopping
at the department store

I did not know why
or what we needed
but mother's word
was always heeded

so to the car
and off we go
time to shop
soon I would know

we went to boy's clothing
much to my surprise
a funny place
to get school supplies

I looked up and asked
for then I was shorter
she said you have gym
and need a supporter

I thought to myself
as I missed her meaning
I will not be going out
for cheer leading

or maybe a jersey
is what she could mean
is gym held in clothes
that support our school team

so we walked up to
a nice looking lady
mom showed her the list
the lady said maybe

they talked about size
as they looked at my waist
then both of them chuckled
and turned with great haste

she said he's a small
if I had a guess
is his father real small
mom frowned but said yes

the lady looked sad
as she looked at the floor
and said its alright
he will grow I'm quite sure

so reaching into
a shelf on the wall
she pulled out a package
and showed it to all

much to my horror
as my eyes read the box
I was so embarrassed
twas a strap made for jocks

my mother just smiled
the lady did too
go try this on
it's sized just for you

i said with bravado
as i puffed up my chest
I think I take large
or medium at best

they both laughed again
as they nodded and smiled
said large is for men
and you're just a child

i went to the room
looking down, I was shy
i thought I'd stay there
at least till I die

they called in behind me
and said like they know
don't get undressed
don't take off your clothes

just pull it on over
your pants we don't care
does it bind, does it chafe
does it pinch you down there

I said it's just fine
my voice just a squeak
when we got home
I hid for a week

I never did know
if it fit me OK
I threw it out
that very same day

I took gym that year
and to my delight
I looked at the others
not a **** strap in sight
Karl Stewart Feb 2011
Giving Blessings
From His Own
The Giver gives
But remains unknown.

The masses ponder
upon his nature.
Yet cannot begin
To imagine his grandeur.

From where did he come?
Was he here at the start?
I can't comprehend Him
I'm just not that smart.

My faith is firm
Or that's what I say
But sometimes I wonder
Am I easily swayed?

With all of my doubts
I stumble along
I pray Him great praises
I sing Him great songs.

Not sure if He is
Not sure if He's not
I continue to pray
On Sundays, a lot.

Just hedging my bets?
Or playing along?
I'm not sure I believe
I'm not sure I belong.

I've seen many things
I could not explain
I've witnessed his greatness
Yet suffered great pain.

I want to believe
to be zealous and all
but He seems so big
And I feel so small.

Not sure I know
As I wander this way
I'm not sure what I've seen
I'm not sure what to say.

I have seen some blessings
I have witnessed some pain
I have seen his nature
but don't know his name.

Giving Blessings
From His Own
The Giver gives
But remains unknown.
went back and reread the original
thought it could be improved a little
790 · Sep 2010
On the Other Hand
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
once in a while i am happy
and once in a while i am not
on the other hand i don't give a ****
i've been feeling that way a lot

they say it takes only six muscles to smile
and fortytwo muscles to glare
but it takes not one when feelings are shunned
to look like you just dont care

if caring is an art form
then outside the lines i draw
i dont even try to ponder or pry
how you feel, if you feel at all

your problems are of no concern
my indifference may seem out of place
i dont really care if you're here or you're there
so please get out of my face

and if i should say do you feel ok
an answer is not what i seek
i'm merely polite and my tongue i should bite
your answer is yours to keep

please dont be offended
by what i have said
i dont wish you ill
i just wish you'd drop dead

with you i am not dissappointed
with your welfare concerned i am not
on the other hand i dont give a ****
i've been feeling that way a lot
781 · Sep 2010
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
I'm on a diuretic
And one thing is for sure
The only thing i cannot pass
Is the men's room door

I drink a lot but that's not good
I cannot take a trip
Cuz when I go, I really go
Not just little drips

Don't block my way
I'll knock you down
To get where I must go
Diuretics rule my life
And they run the show

My legs look great
They do not swell
There's no more water weight
But that was not always the case
My ankles would dilate

I do not use adult diapers
I'm in control you know
Unless of course
There is no place
To go when I must go

Getting old is so much fun
But when the day is through
I know my place
In this big world
It's in stall number two.
752 · Oct 2010
Revelation Defied
Karl Stewart Oct 2010
an empire in decline
has a certain instability
so much so that
theories are often fallable
divided, such nations seldom stand
united in cause and
with an economy of purpose
such decline is not certain
yet the solution is
seldom obvious
often subtle
currently defying revelation
words used: Instability, Decline, Economy, Fallible and Subtle
745 · Aug 2010
In Late Autumn
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
In late autumn,
When leaves have turned,
And the air is chill,
Thoughts turn to growing up in PA.
Walks through the woods,
In early morning.
Catching a glimpse of a white tail,
Hearing those birds that haven't left.
Smell of smoke,
From chimneys nearby,
Smells of leaves starting to decay,
The look of bare trees.
Impossible to walk quietly,
So many things that snap and crunch.
Twigs and leaves everywhere,
Couldn't sneak around if i wanted to.
Down by the pond,
Wondering when will we be able to ice skate.
Looking for tracks,
I see rabbits, raccoons, deer tracks everywhere.
Up hills and down,
I loved the mild exertion.
Flat as a pancake here in sunny FL.
No change of seasons,
At least not worth noticing.
Only two here, Wet and Dry.
Always hot,
I miss seeing my breath.
Too hot most days to even go out,
I miss being outdoors.
When I have my drothers,
Whatever that is,
I think I'll move farther north.
I don't want to go as far as PA,
I just need hills,
And streams, and ponds,
And, of course, a change of seasons.
Why is every body of water here,
Called a lake or a river?
We had puddles, and ponds,
And streams, and creeks.
I miss all that,
But not enough to act, yet.
I think of these things,
In late autumn.
It isn't even autumn and I am thinking like this.  Told you I can't tell the seasons here.
723 · Aug 2010
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
Buns sliced
Chicken grilled
For haiku, is this too simple?
721 · Oct 2011
The Choice Is Hers
Karl Stewart Oct 2011
Watching the roguish young man

walk towards her with languid grace

she swoons with possibilities

only imagined.

His actions speak in tones

of pure sensuality

as with a soft feathery touch

he reaches out

and runs his fingers through her hair.

Spinning her around and leaning in,

their eyes connect as

they gaze into the mirror.

His sonorous voice fills with promise

as with scissors in hand

he quietly asks,

How would you like it cut?
This is the result of a list of words provided by a friend. The words are:
roguish   sonorous   feathery   scissors   tones
709 · Sep 2010
Hold the Door
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
Lunch with the girls is fine with me
We chat and laugh and dine
We talk of this and talk of that
And have a good old time

Sometimes there's one, or maybe two
Sometimes it's three or more
And every time we go to lunch
I try to hold the door

But chivalry is dead you see
And sometimes others whine
They fight to hold the door for me
And claim "the turn is mine"

I thought it was OK to hold
The door for other's too
But if the door for you I hold
You want to hold it too

Equal rights is what you say
Sometimes I would agree
But not when holding doors for you
A gift I give for free

If chauvinist is how you see
The person that I am
I guess I better place this rose
In someone else's hand

I was raised in times gone by
When men were gentle-men
And women were so many things
But mainly ladies then

You'd hold the door and you'd be told
That everything was fine
You'd hold the door for young and old
And never hear them whine

You never had to hire defense
And prove your motives pure
You knew there'd be no consequence
Because you held the door.
Karl Stewart Oct 2010
i sit here with tears in my beer
as i sip from this cup called despair
the lights are real low, the music is slow
and stale smoke hangs in the air

nowhere to go and nothing to do
i will sit here the whole night long
i don't care any more, as i stare at the floor
and i hum an old country song

if i was an old country song
would i bring every body's mood down
or make people smile, if just for a while
as i cut up and act like a clown

if i was an old country song
would any one come sing with me
would they shed a tear whenever they hear
my tale of sweet misery

last call is finally near
i've sunk to the bottom i fear
i am actually thinking of loving and leaving
the old lady who's missing one ear

but she does not look all that bad
i am drunk and that is awful sad
i am really quite sure as we walk to the door
i'm the best offer that she has had

as old one ear looks up at me
it is rejection i'm shown
i see her head shake and my leave i must take
once more i'll be sleeping alone  

if i was an old country song
i would want to be happy and free
i'd kick up me heals to laughter and squeals
at least that is how it should be

if i was an old country song
would any one come sing along
would they shed a tear whenever they hear
my life as told in this here song
maybe not
701 · Jan 2011
She Found Me Quite Fair
Karl Stewart Jan 2011
i was standing outside
not trying to hide
just trying to make a phone call
a woman approaches
and the subject she broaches
has me completely appalled

she says do you dance
and given the chance
would you mind dancing with me
i find you quite fair
and the gray in your hair
is a major turn on you see

and your evening my friend
perchance you could spend
most of it drinking chablis
so when we go home
and I have you alone
i wont look quite so homely

so inside the bar
i had run off quite far
when i saw her looking my way
her head she did swivel
as she started to dribble
and i tried to get far far away

i tried to blend in
and i started to grin
as a waitress came to my side
she said get behind me
and said that she would see
if she could help me to hide

i was so relieved
and could not believe
i made it, if just by an inch
this lovely young maid
had come to my aid
i was caught by surprise by her pinch

my **** was her aim
my attention to gain
she said that she wanted me too
she said that i owe her
and i could run nowhere
so dance with me one song or two

so then dance i did
from the other i hid
this is not such a bad life
the waitress in question
i forgot to mention
was none other than my sweet wife.
based on a true event lol
697 · Dec 2010
God Smiled
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
standing here, arms wrapped tight
eyes closed, swaying slightly
listening to the sounds of each others life
there is melody in your breathing
rhythm in your heartbeat
wonder in your eyes
and beauty in your spirit
to say you complete me
would not begin
to explore the depths
of my feelings for you
there is a peace
in your presence
that comes over me
except that our souls
are somehow
God has smiled
on me, with
693 · Dec 2010
Ode to a Day with Laura
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
wa wa
wo is me
down in the dumps
sad as can be

let's have a party
you can come
we will all frown
and have no fun.

a pity party
just for me
we all will cry
just come and see

don't get too close
don't give me love
don't comfort me
I don't want hugs

I'd rather feel
bad for a while
so I can cry
and never smile

cheer me up
and I'll be mad
i'd rather sit
and feel real bad

down in the dumps
sad as can be
wa wa
wo is me
692 · Sep 2010
my spel chec is broakin
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
my spel chec is broakin
and I reely cannut rite
my spel chec is broakin
but my wurds com owt alrite

my spel chec is broakin
I hope my thaughts com thru
my spel chec is broakin
as I em riting this to yu

my spel chec is broakin
I em trying reely hard
my spel chec is broakin
ant I em such a card

my spel chec is broakin
maybe I will lirn som day
my spel chec is broakin
but u rede thees wurds I say

my spel chec is broakin
but I can rite OK
my spel chec is broakin
I rite gooder evry day
just feeling silly
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
Now I lay me down to sleep,
I pray the lord I never meet,
the boogey man who lives under my bed,
I hate that guy,
always keeping me awake with his snoring.
675 · Aug 2010
She Is, I Am
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
Your life will never change
By doing what you've done
You must change yourself
Even if it is no fun

Step out of your comfort
Step out they all say
Step out and try
You will grow in this way

You must talk to people
And hear what they say
You must push the edge
You must find your way

But I am not ready
The time is not right
I feel so timid
Paralyzed with fright

And then there's my tongue
It gets ******* in knots
And so does my stomach
the words I forgot

Why does she push
I'll just shy away
Why does she push
Always wanting her way

She thinks it's her way
Or the road you may hit
She thinks she is right
And you should never quit

But we're not all the same
We're not all out going
Some only sit
While others are rowing

I'm sure I'll do fine
I'll give it a try
I'll push myself further
Don't ask me why

Sometimes it's easier
To just go along
To show her the dance
And give her the song

It's our future she's building
Or so I am told
She is a go getter
She is really quite bold

So let her meet people
And I'll show the plan
She is what she is
I am what I am

They say we are partners
We each have a part
Wish I'd known mine
Right from the start

She is a woman
And I am a man
She is what she is
I am what I am
672 · Nov 2010
the Dash
Karl Stewart Nov 2010
when God has finally called you home
and all that's left is a cold gray stone
two dates are inscribed there upon
when you got started and when you were done

and in between your death and birth
is a little dash to show your worth
in that dash is the time you spent
it is who you were and where you went

when you were born is not your fault
so to your credit you count it naught
and when you died is just a date
twas not your choice but just your fate

your life we count, for what it's worth
by the time you spend upon this earth
the time you are given is all you get
so waste it not, have no regrets

do not be sad with hands a ringing
do not cry when you should be singing
be up, not down when times are rough
reach out, help others when they've had enough

do something of worth with the time you have
in every moment, in all things, be glad
strive for excellence at whatever your task
and live for others while in the dash
inspired by Alton Maiden's poem of the same name.
670 · Dec 2010
Train of Thought
Karl Stewart Dec 2010
rails running down the line
always together
converging in the distance
becoming as one.
our lives are in sync
always moving forward
often remembering back.
parallel our course
as together we proceed
onto the horizon go we.
neither one as useful alone
as both working together.
with ties that bind us
one to the other
we stay in gauge.
to be of any use at all
neither can wander far.
if either of us strays
the other is diminished.
united we swore
an oath so solemn
and together we must go
if we manage to go at all.
668 · Aug 2010
From a Creative Mind
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
From a Creative Mind,
Spring Words Full Grown.
Almost as if they were their own.

Am I the author,
Or just a scribe,
When writing words into this libe.

I do not know,
I do not care,
these words come from I know not where.

If they come,
I thank the mage,
And write them down upon this page.

But if they stop,
Can I force them out,
Can I create, I have my doubt.

From a creative mind,
Spring words full grown,
They definitely are their very own.
First posting...
656 · Feb 2011
Do You See Me?
Karl Stewart Feb 2011
Do you see me?
Do you really see me?
Everyone can see
just not the me that is me.

The me that I see
when looking inside
is not the same me
that others would spy.

The me that I know
and the me that I show
may be different sometimes.
It depends where I go.

I am not a chameleon.
I am not in disguise.
I just think it unsafe
and perhaps it's unwise,

To reveal who I am
till I know who you are.
It is personal to me
so I keep you quite far.

Till I know I can trust
in your kindess of heart.
I can't tell this at first.
I can't tell from the start.

I must know you quite well
before I will show
the me that's inside,
the me that I know.

But to those whom I know
I sometimes reveal
the me that I know,
the me that is real.

So if you see me
you still may not know,
if it's me that you see
or the me that I show.
656 · Sep 2010
Lunch (2)
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
Sliced buns laid open
grilled chicken seasoned just right
Lunch to be savored
tried to follow 5-7-5 for haiku (thanks Jessie)
653 · Sep 2010
For Your Approval
Karl Stewart Sep 2010
Submitted for your approval
a story from lord knows where
a scene so bizarre and other worldly
out straight will stand your hair

your vision has not gone fuzzy
it's the world that's gone awry
your hearing is also working
but the sound is like a lie

don't always believe what I show you
and none of what you hear
I lie and scheme and spin my tale
in your heart I will strike fear

if not for other reasons
at least come witness my part
my story will fool the weary
and scare the faint of heart

do not be surprised if you see a change
your face will twisted stay
you hunch your back and drag your leg
come here, and walk this way

be skeptical and spot the lie
you must always discern
listen with your ear and heart
and in you truth will burn

then your eyes they will not fool you
seeing sharply is what you do
the world will then stay in focus
and the words will still ring true

submitted for your approval
come hear me if you dare
my world is odd and oh so strange
out straight will stand your hair
638 · Aug 2010
Given the Chance
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
If given the chance,
To sit or dance,
I know the choice I've made.

With trepidation,
And faint of heart,
I sat there in the shade.

Get up and out,
Move past the doubt,
And move my lazy duff.

I've had my fill,
Of sitting still
Enough is finally enough.

With choices made,
I leave the shade,
And step into the light.

I dance,
Whenever chance comes near,
My choices now seem bright.

I've leaned way out,
And grabbed the ring,
I know it's the right choice.

So when given the chance,
To sit or dance,
New courage gives me voice.
622 · Aug 2010
From The Heart
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
From the heart,
These thoughts come forth,
In plenty, their numbers abound.

To inform or just amuse,
To make clear,
Or just confound.

To bring a smile,
Or maybe a frown,
Toothy grin or eyebrows down.

It's fun to dream,
The day away,
but somber thoughts do come my way.

Sometimes joyous,
Sometimes sad,
Sometimes good and sometimes bad.

Sometimes late,
When darkness nears,
Thoughts grow meek from unknown fears.

From childhood dreams,
To reality present,
Thoughts grow stern and become unpleasant.

Once all grown up,
Serious possessed,
We loose the joy that innocence blessed.

Come back, oh joy,
And bless my thoughts,
Unhappiness I care for, not.

From the heart,
These thoughts come forth,
In plenty, their numbers abound.
618 · Aug 2010
One Fish One Frog
Karl Stewart Aug 2010
One fish, One frog,
One cat, One dog,
Two kids, and two of us.

We are happy,
And we do fine,
Aboard our custom bus.

There is no room,
For toys and things,
We're amused with what we find.

Please don't feel bad,
Cuz we're not sad,
For what we left behind.

We left our house,
We left our jobs,
We both left the rat race.

And when we said,
We quit our jobs,
You should have seen their face.

We're happy now,
And oh so calm,
While tooling down the road.

We don't look back,
And that's a fact,
We've hit the mother load.
616 · May 2011
A Warrior's Lament
Karl Stewart May 2011
when once again
I've found my friend
and together we share what's new

I thank my stars
as I've traveled far
I have a friend like you

for with my friend
time and again
I find we do agree

on many things
and what life means
it's eye to eye we see

arm in arm
at risk of harm
together we shall go

into the night
we go to fight
against our common foe

but if the end
does come my friend
still sweet it's taste will be

for I've laughed and lived
and fought and loved
beside a friend like thee
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