Hey there old friend
let's startover again
Things have been said
Things have been read
I know I've said I hate you
That was a bad thing to do
And I know you don't care
so like...
Whatever right

We both believed the others lies
Neither one was originally untrue
I don't know cause I'm not you
But... did your heart break too

Ohh-oh-ohh I don't know
I don't care
I just don't know what to do
I really want to forgive you
But I don't want to leave the past behind
What the hell, what the hell
is wrong with me
Cause I know you see it
Or maybe you don't
I don't know
But I really hope you won't
Find out why
I...
I can't seem to make up my mind

Can't help but tell the truth
I can't decide how to feel about you
Just like an angel I've fallen from grace
but the lies that we told are just all over the place
What the hell, yeah what the hell
Why did you follow me when I fell
Now what the hell is wrong with me
I still don't know so just let me be alone
But I still want you here
So just go away
I can't make up my mind
Please I want you to stay

I want to forget what you look like
Let me take your picture so I'll never forget your face
I can't stand your voice now
Can you record a song for me
I'll never know where we went wrong
But the memory of it is still fresh in my brain
I hate that you lied
But I love how you told the truth
You messed with me and can't forgive that
But I can forgive you
Except I don't
and yet I really do
I can't tell you how much I hate you
but maybe that's because I don't
So please get out of my life
And promise to talk to me everyday
Don't I know
how do I feel
feel how I do
I
Don't
Know
Unless I...
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Everybody wants
to be like Bukowski,
that drunken
drug-induced
crazed-scholar
born on the edge of existence,
who tested the poetic boundaries,
who spewed forth sacred *****
from his mind of brilliant depravity
& who loved the starry nights
& the suckling robins
of the early summer.

And pray tell me
my fellow sojourners,
how does one get like that,
get strung out
on this living
kissing heaven
& embrace hell
without
the use of
tasty liquid-vices
& those ******
****** injections.

******.

I saw someone taking your picture today.
You looked amazing.
I'm glad someone saw your beauty and captured it,
because I've tried countless times in my words
and in my art,
but nothing I do can truly show how special you are.

In the wake of what happened
Sleep beckons me
With half-truthful promises
Of whom I may see.

Half frightened, I’ve spent
Minutes… and days
Fighting the slumber
That takes me away.

Half wanting and wishing,
I let shut my eyes
And pray for the darkness
Of my paradise.

Where you walk beside me
Whole and unscathed
And say through those lips
“I could not be saved.”

Yet stand here before me
With eyes like the sea
Tangible, touchable
And right next to me.

So how can I move on
Or even forget
When dreaming of you is
The last thing I get?

I dreamt before it happened,

It happened before I dreamt.

It ended before it could begin;

Began there at the end.

The past yearned for the future,

The future for the past;

But nothing comes from everything,

And everything never lasts.

If I was a mountain

That soared towards the sky,

With craggy snow caps

And stormy grey eyes-



Then you'd be the clouds

That swaddled my peak,

That silenced my thunder

When I tried to speak.



If I was the earth

The desert, in fact:

With arid dry soil

And mud, baked and cracked-



You'd be the rain

The downpour that soothed;

The balm to my bruises,

Relief to my wounds.



If I was the Moon

In the indigo night,

With stars as my blanket

And silver; my light-



Well you'd be the Sun

Just always behind

That lent me your glow

And caused me to shine.