I can’t stand your face marring my scarred reflection
Won’t you go back where you come from?
Are you here to help me or just observation?
An angel in a demon’s body

You’re from a perfect world
Why lower yourself
To my world of sorrow?
I’m from another place
I can’t rise above
Myself for tomorrow

Go away, I’ll keep all my lacerations
The blood is the only thing that’s true
I just cannot stand all your accusations
That’s why I’d rather be alone

You’re from a perfect world
Why lower yourself
To my world of sorrow?
I’m from another place
I can’t rise above
Myself for tomorrow

It hurts me so
To see the beauty of your face
It burns me so
For you are something I can never be

So stay here, you think you’ll bring me salvation
But all it does is poison me so
I’ll stay here myself and bring you damnation
For that is what I’m made to do

You’re from a perfect world
Why lower yourself
To my world of sorrow?
I’m from another place
I can’t rise above
Myself for tomorrow

You slipped right through my fingers
(I never really had you any way)

I could swear up and down you don't care for me. It makes things so much easier.

Flashback to you kissing my freckled cheek while I'm asleep. Telling me words I've save for later. I'll turn them over and over in my head like worry stones.

Flashforward to you sitting with me in a crowded place. "We're just friends," you say evenly. I try my best not to squirm. Because we were never just anything.

I knew I'd pay the price for this. But who was I to give up a body that fit so well into mine?

You dowsed my ribs in gasoline when you first spoke words of your affection. You consistently threw lit matches at me.

Now you recoil and Jesus Christ, how do I begin to put myself out?

Do I even want to?

You show me a match you've saved for later. I don't know if able to reconstruct myself for the hell of it just to watch it burn later

Don't think I wasn't destructive before you. I am, and I will be infinitely. I am thinking of how my smoke built up in your lungs. Exhale now. Doing what's best for all involved parties.

"Do you know what it was like being around you, knowing I couldn't hold you?"

In that moment I'm certain somewhere in another life I would have loved you. Because all I ever wanted was the kind of romance I could write about it. The kind of sadness and longing that settles behind your ribs. If it had been a book I would've dog eared us and wept. But this is my life, real life and I can't just this back on the shelf.

I love the girl who is too young to smoke cigarettes but lights them anyway. She sits on the high school bleachers at 9 on a Sunday night, gets tired of the smoke in her eyes, and tosses eventual death in the trash can.
I love the girl who has never enjoyed the taste of alcohol but feels like Holly Golightly when she holds a glass of Cabernet so she drinks it anyway. She sits in her grandfather’s lounge chair on a Monday night, plays the songs he taught her on the *****, neglects her English essay, and leaves the red remains in the bottle.
I love the girl who cannot stand the sound of my guitar, but pretends to like acoustics because she knows the music brings out the best in me, and that even if she asks me to stop, I will play anyway. She lies on the floor on a Tuesday night, wishing she were in another town too small to be called a city, listens to melodies that remind her of where she is, ignores my creations and leaves my heart in her hands as she finally falls asleep.

i've always been know as an emotional disaster,
my thoughts never necessarily made sense to me.
my thoughts sometimes drive me to insanity,
my thoughts sometimes stress me to no end,
i'm sixteen years old with grey hairs and a beard.
i feel as though my soul is aging faster than my own appearance is.

John Keats
John Keats
John
Please put your scarf on.

Yellow
Yellow is the colour of bananas when the're ripe.
Yellow is the sound of a bell ringing behind the door.
Yellow is the feeling of warmth when you're praised.
Yellow is the smell of sunflowers while you play.
Yellow is the taste of an ice lolly on a hot summer day.
Yellow is the colour of think cheddar cheese.
Yellow is the sound of any kind of music.
Yellow is the feeling after a great meal.
Yellow is the smell of buried treasure somewhere underneath.
Yellow is the taste of pineapples drowned in thick syrup.
Yellow is the colour of kids whizzing by.
Yellow is the sound of your friend laughing.
Yellow is the feeling you get when you're sleeping.
Yellow is the smell of the number 25.
Yellow is the taste of cookies waiting to be eaten.
And yellow is a colour that is vibrant and alive.

I've tried to put it down, but it seems this pen is glued to my hand,
No pulse, no heartbeat, similar to the Tin-Man, but I do my best to look alive when I can
At the end of each day I'm still tryin' to figure out who I am,
All this contemplation leads to a lot of frustration and I become a frustrated man

How much can one loss cost when there's no ocean to drown in or swim across? For now, I'll forget about it and just drown in my thoughts

Joseph, Joe, Jo-ey,
or how about just Mr. lone-ly
Call me what you want, but
you'll never really know-me

I'm on an over populated planet,
yet I still feel alone with no home and I can't stand it
Why am I always so cold, tough, bold , maybe you can help me understand my role

It's like amnesia in my brain, still tryin' to write and read my own name after losing my favorite game
So for now just call me anonymous, cause I kept fallin' after I thought I hit bottom so I guess I'm just bottomless,
None the less I must confess, I cheated death, while gambling with my life as I was penniless

Truth be told, I sold my soul and I'm growing old,
So I remain standing alone in the pouring rain, hoping one day it will wash away all my sin stains

Of course I strayed the course and I'm all sorts of original, this world is elliptical,
I'd rather be a corpse than be typical...

-J.A.M