And here it comes again
The lack of breath
Cold fingers
Blurry thoughts
Even if I know I shouldn’t feel like it.
I do.
It’s not an obvious jealously, though.
It’s a terrifying thought of loosing all definitions of love.
All over again.
I’m so afraid I want to run away.
And maybe disappearing is a solution.
After all, if I won’t be here, the love will be just paused, not dead.

It will wait for my return.
You, with a dozen of roses and a soft smile.
Me, healed, ready for a new start.

Why did I want to stay close to you so desperately?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because we got addicted to things that are bad for us.

The way we go
It's so calm
The life goes on
The time stops

We are constantly trying to find peace, love, happiness
Now I know - You can't find it, Let it go
Look around and enjoy

The life is here not there
Today not tomorrow
Don't waste your time
Smile, laugh and walk
Enjoy the way we go

If one day
Far or further in the future
I will be able to love him
At least half like I loved you
I will be happiest girl alive

First LOVE

was my imagination
very fine worlds creation

yesterday for ever
today NEVER

You saw me cry and ask
Would you like some coffee?

And with every next sip
Of black, bitter coffee

I was forgetting him
And making space for you

Just because I seem strong doesn’t mean I can be left all by myself.
Just because I wasn’t crying doesn’t mean I didn’t care.
Just because I wasn’t writing you doesn’t mean I didn’t want to talk
Just because I left doesn’t mean I didn’t want to stay

When I say it’s okey, it wasn’t, can you finally get it?
How could you take your soul away from me?
Leaving me with empty whole
That hurts every morning

Was it love if I’m so replaceable?
Just because I seem strong, doesn’t mean I will survive your lost.