Everyday is growing harder and harder to bare, sometimes it seems like the most difficult task in the world to run a brush through my hair.

Each and every day is the same, wake up, work, home, it's enough to drive any person insane.

But I always knew I had an escape, it was you, your arms were like these two big protective capes. Shielding me from the harshness of the world, all the awful things that go on. But lately I can't help but feel that you've been with drawn.

Have I done something to scare you? Something to make you back away, I can feel myself breaking down with each step that you take. You say you're not going anywhere, that you love me that you'll stay, but actions have always spoken louder than words so I can't help but wait for that day.

I need to fix myself, before its too late, I need to get control of my mind, of myself, before I seal our fate.

So once again I ask you before it's too late, just give me a chance, give me a new slate. I need some time, I need to feel love, I need to feel like this big messy world isn't against me, I need; well I need you, I need us.

In you I found someone I could share the silence with,
And that meant almost everything.

Before I could even count, you were drinking from that bottle.
Becoming stranger and stranger to me after each and every swallow.

One, Two, Three,
The time went on, and before I could count to ten you were already gone.

Four, Five, Six, Seven,
Before I knew it I was eleven. Still though nothing had changed, that bottle had always been around; it was really nothing strange.

Eight, Nine, Ten, Eleven,
Thats all that she could take, she kicked you out the door; said she had made a mistake.

Twelve years was all it took.
To drive us all away.

But atleast you have your bottle, right?
To this very day.

What do you think it’s like?
I mean the other side.

Do you think it’s stunning and beautiful?
Filled with a light divine?
Do you imagine infinite happiness, a world filled with blue skies?

Can you see the love, feel it in your bones?
No more heart ache, tears, or painful moans?

Is the wind always calm, the clouds perfectly white?
Do you think there are always beautiful starry nights?

Or do you think it’s dark?

Not a single soul in sight, do you think you'll hear the screams, be immersed in the blackest of nights?

Do you think you'll feel the cold, hear the lonely cries from hollow eyes?
Do you think you’ll suddenly remember all your broken dreams?

Will there be constant storms, battles in your mind?
Do you think you’ll constantly be scared and never know the time?

Will those dark nights go on forever, with you wandering about?
Always looking for someone but never having them reach out.

So what do you think happens when you reach the other side?
Will you float in eternal glory?
Or will you crawl and hide?

I used to see you so clearly;
your smile, your eyes, your walk.
The way you sipped your coffee, the way you talked.

I used to reach for your hand; on the good days and the bad.
But now when I go to reach there's nothing there, its rather sad.

I'm loosing my memories of you, there slipping from me.
I no longer remember your eyes, or the way you like your coffee.

I no longer reach for you; I'm walking alone now.
Somehow I've moved on, although I don't know how.

I find myself smiling and its no longer because of you.
I find myself laughing, grinning, going on without you.

Its really very sad, they said this would happen.
Now all i have left is a heart with a scar and a lesson.

Isn’t it funny how the memories we used to love to get lost in are the same ones that **** us a little more each day.
The memories that you always told yourself you wouldn’t dare forget.
The memories that made you tingle, made you smile, made you blush.
Those sacred memories that only the two of you shared.
Those memories that used to bring you the up most happiness, are now that ones that break you.
The single thought of them shatters you over and over again the more you think of them, because now they hurt.
They’re not happy memories anymore.
They’re memories that you want to put at the back of your mind.
That you want to forget. Because they remind you of what you had.
They remind you that you’ll never get those feelings back, those moments back. That person back.
So you wake up each day and try your hardest to block them out.
But all they do is hit you.
Hit you like a freight train reminding you of that terrible mistake you made.
And that no matter what you do or say, those memories will never become happy again. You’ll never get lost in them again. You’ll just dwell on them. You’ll accept the pain, and try each day to remember to forget.