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Feeling dizzy like
I may have took to many shots and thinking
My ideas are better sober
Better when my head is clear and I know
What I shouldn’t say
But I never really know so
Maybe the truth should have its day
Im feeling dizzy and
I’m  praying to a god who doesn’t listen
Who may not even exist
That you might just miss me,
That when I am most afraid all I want's
For you to kiss me.
I remember being seven and scared,
The ground trembling to the sound of
A smash and the tinkling of broken glass,
My feet bare on the old wood floors,
My heart beats fast as the house sways
My eyes peeled listening to the awful things they say,
Hate resonating in the old bones of this house
I scrabble to the safe corner of my dim room
And papers start to scatter, and my favorite pen hold my
Trembling hand,
And years pass and pages burn ,
I learn to un-hear the awful words I heard.
I buried myself in books and
Sentences, in syllables in a million beautiful words.
I lost stray poems like bits of myself,
I forgot entire chapters of repeated
Life lessons and tried to unlearn
What the hard parts of life teach us.
Escaped to the far reaches, where hopelessness was
Dreadfully close but could never quite reach us.
I would have loved to read,
All the words I spread on empty white sheets,
All the lessons I’d have left for my older me
Stacked in high mountains on those old wood floors,
I would love to explore the lost chapters of myself,
I morn there loss like my childhood identity.
Perhaps every last page
was just one step closer to serenity.
I wonder how many notebooks I would have to fill,
If thoughts of you would exceed the life of my pen.
Probably, but then again I might get trapped in
all the things we never said.
I might get caught inside my head,
revisiting all the things that made me feel
like I was silly to think you would want me,
A brokenness that haunts me,
I'll set down my God forsaken pen
And stop writing.
I will remember how every conversation lead
with hard question
is accused of my want of a fight..
I have been fighting
All the hard parts alone.
I wonder how many note books I could fill
About feeling on my own.
I wonder how many notebooks I could fill
with all the parts of you, you never let me know.
 Jul 2011 Jessie
PK Wakefield
do i
      (with under you
        r skirt
          i pluck you
           snarling
            little fairy
             my fingers
              nimbly gowned
               in your flesh
                and wetness
                 completely
                  slipperying
                   )
                        reckon swelling
                       eve falling lushly
                       her stink
                      on
                    U
                       string
                    fervently
                   pumped
                       into right
                    between your
              lips
suddenly
              !
 Jul 2011 Jessie
Sylvia Plath
Lady, your room is lousy with flowers.
When you kick me out, that's what I'll remember,
Me, sitting here bored as a loepard
In your jungle of wine-bottle lamps,
Velvet pillows the color of blood pudding
And the white china flying fish from Italy.
I forget you, hearing the cut flowers
Sipping their liquids from assorted pots,
Pitchers and Coronation goblets
Like Monday drunkards. The milky berries
Bow down, a local constellation,
Toward their admirers in the tabletop:
Mobs of eyeballs looking up.
Are those petals of leaves you've paried with them ---
Those green-striped ovals of silver tissue?
The red geraniums I know.
Friends, friends. They stink of armpits
And the invovled maladies of autumn,
Musky as a lovebed the morning after.
My nostrils prickle with nostalgia.
Henna hags:cloth of your cloth.
They tow old water thick as fog.

The roses in the Toby jug
Gave up the ghost last night. High time.
Their yellow corsets were ready to split.
You snored, and I heard the petals unlatch,
Tapping and ticking like nervous fingers.
You should have junked them before they died.
Daybreak discovered the bureau lid
Littered with Chinese hands. Now I'm stared at
By chrysanthemums the size
Of Holofernes' head, dipped in the same
Magenta as this fubsy sofa.
In the mirror their doubles back them up.
Listen: your tenant mice
Are rattling the ******* packets. Fine flour
Muffles their bird feet: they whistle for joy.
And you doze on, nose to the wall.
This mizzle fits me like a sad jacket.
How did we make it up to your attic?
You handed me gin in a glass bud vase.
We slept like stones. Lady, what am I doing
With a lung full of dust and a tongue of wood,
Knee-deep in the cold swamped by flowers?
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