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 Sep 2012 jeremy maxwell
Quinn
it's funny that they call it plan b
because usually it's more like plan d
and even then, you're not really sure
that it's such a good plan at all

and even though the pharmacist
in wegmans doesn't flinch,
you still wonder what she's thinking
and the wondering goes on a long while

i watched **** tattooed men
make me drinks with 80 proof whiskey,
and tried to forget that i ******
someone i didn't give a **** about

that maybe, just maybe,
cells had begun to multiply,
but maybe they hadn't, and i
was feeling like ****
drinking my 10 dollar drink
for nothing

the next morning i woke up,
red lipped, wild curls framing
a face that spoke of last night's failures

i stood in front of the mirror
and i captured the face of a girl
the morning after
 Sep 2012 jeremy maxwell
Quinn
i am ******* dying
to be something other
than a ***** hiding from
her own shadow,
twisting herself up in
senseless wants

maybe if i tattoo my skin
or gauge my earlobes
or pierce my nose
or wear band t-shirts no one's heard of
or go to shows and head bang alone,
then, yes,
then, i will be unique,
oh ****,
there's a tumblr for that,
actually, there are a thousand tumblrs for that,
moving on...

how about i try
wearing black and
hiding from the light,
pulling away until
i only come out at night,
speaking to no one
but the notebook i carry
everywhere with me,
ah, ****, that's been done too

here, here, how about this,
i'll enter the mainstream,
get my degree,
even work a job from seven to three,
marry a **** bag
with no sense of life,
have some kids,
and pretend i take joy in being a wife,
and then, when i'm having
his colleagues over for dinner,
i'll lose it and **** them all
with a butcher knife

as i backflip over
our ten thousand dollar
dining room set
they'll oooh and aaah,
and somehow forget,
that i'm ending their mediocrity,
instead they'll think,
what yoga studio did she join?
her legs are so much more
defined than mine

and as they all lay bleeding out
over their
steak tartar,
i will smile and smooth my
perfect blonde hair,
and wait
to join the leagues
of the unforgettable
tonight i looked up into the night sky...and i saw how lucky i am to be alive.
how is it we can see so much in the dark? i saw myself looking back at me.
too far for my own mind to follow.
i thought of spinning around in circles...of history repeating itself.
i thought of seeds sprouting and people dying.
i thought of my body and it's weakness. i saw my strength and resilience.
i thought of living long after i leave this place.
returning to dust and earth. sinking into the deep and floating off into the nothingness.
i thought of the wondrous nothingness. so enormous with purpose.
too far for my own light to follow.
to venture as far as to fade into future and pass into past.
i saw myself looking back at me.
i saw my eyes weathered with age and wisdom.
i saw my heart playful as ignorance. foolish with curiosity.
i knew that from this moment i would not fear death.
for i saw in the dark that i shall never perish.
i saw my return to the night. my return to the dust.
the beautiful beginning end. i saw it begin so long ago.
i knew all along that i could not fear life.
i saw in the dark that i shall always shine brightly.
i saw the gorgeous truth of the extraordinary coincidences.
i thought of my mother and her strength and care.
i thought of my father's photograph... and the life that he lived in my pocket.
i saw him looking down upon me. shining brightly as i would.
i saw myself turning in circles.
i thought of turning...turning...turning into him.
this is such a beautiful place. such a lovely breath of air.
so enormous with purpose.
each one will venture as far as to fade into future and pass into past.
i thought of the last inhale.
i knew at that moment that time has been kind to me.
i thought of holding my breath.
i dreamt of keeping the last thing this world would give me.
i saw myself shimmer like light on the water. i saw myself leaving and coming back.
i knew that in the briefest of moments i would last for eternity.
i saw myself in everyone else. i saw us all fighting for air.
i thought of us spinning around in circles...of history repeating itself.
tonight i looked up into the night sky...and i saw how lucky we are to be alive.
 May 2012 jeremy maxwell
Quinn
desperate men with beard ridden faces
and unique t-shirts with caps on their heads
watch girls move with precisely practiced motion
thrown off by a kilter from the drinks that they mourn

stares that long with a linger that forces
a sharp startling shiver up pale weak spines
keep girls on fences surrounded by sharks
one wrong move and all you'll see is blood

this game that we play with each other is daunting
but fun if you wear your poker face right
and i start to believe that i'm floating above it
when i'm the one who's been dealing hands all along
 May 2012 jeremy maxwell
mEb
Upon his glottal’s larynx spreads a lingual deformity. Isolation as a result from tuggo disaffiliates. Misshapen promontory in the direction of upper-body inflammation. Not only above torso alone, location;head/injury;mouth/main informative;tongue.
The boy’s tongue was permanently horned. A horn of 18 inches shy, where taste buds formulate, he owned a lone spike. He wasn’t abraded by the unfoldment of onlookers around. His irregular attachment was a main confidant. Criticized, he was not welcomed by towns near. Citizen’s were baffled and disgusted, ridiculing him daily, he did not impale with grieve over appearance. Enmity he wanted and craved. Among the works of flesh, square inch niches, repugnance revealed. Revenge, revenge. Vindictive spirit shelled so timely and calm. Remaining this state of sumptuous integrity made him stronger each go about. These goes were so stimulus, adding to the *** of hatred. Deep into the tundra’s most vile he intruded. Went so every month or few, for weeks at a time. For this sheet of rigid earth so contiguous to the town made the worried weary, the skeptical seared, and the nautical not so knitted with directional sense. This was his consummation of gathering. The place of being a being. The dry winter amid eight months was restricted, so the moment a due mustn’t be bothered. He had his reason of validness for course. A rich succulent from the bearings of plant life on cliffs. Repelling an obstacle such as was ludicrous for even one born the ever so adequate and society defined norm. Now having a tongue with a horn, some sought might as well die to be reborn. He had to, to stay alive. The liquid, which sit so treacherous, was the mold to mouth medicine. To speak at all it must be attained. Not only a curdling death trap waiting to swallow, the boy had to get a plentiful amount for the hard hitting winters collied. His tongue could swell like the storms, loud crimson on the esophagus. To die of asphyxiation was his dodge of ultimatum.
While passing by a local television in a thrift shop-
“Today’s Newscast: Blizzards, moving in at speeds of 94 mph. Predicted to cover like a blanket for 12 months. Ice Age relative people, this one is gonna be big! Stay indoors at night, the barometric’s indicate that from 9PM to 4AM temperatures as low as 28- will stouten for the next year. Once again people, stay indoors at these hours, get your needs when available. Back to you Ronda with the quintuplets birth today!”
Plucked and grit witted he stood. He felt the trepidation of abhorrence swaying in orbit around him. How to emanate from this delay? At least five clones of self did not exist for him. Merriment struct pro, while the cons derived from which they know. Exultation when despondent, how greatly that gift could gab. Despoilment of that, he weighed options out. To altercate thick snow or simply, let it go. Afraid to die unrivaled, the off cutting is wisest. Since his first second to now he’s flourished with his horn. Obliteration to the occulted manifestation mannered as an antique replica of anyone catching him by twice by day. Remove it, remove it, remove if you want life in your years that follow. Remove it, ever so. Remove it, cut and sew. Cut and sew. Remove.
This plateau poisoned place stay calm, anticipating climate of tempest bold reaches, anyone who was anyone was not so. Negative degrees. How could he retaliate the opposite, while acquiring a surgeon field hay day buck builder? Eruption turns the wave of cons. An only equal precision, deciding, tonight is the night. To assemble the tools, publicly was questionable, no more, through. He will emerge to the lands and people a new man, sustained, and hornless. No more. From scratch he will vender what’s needed. Wood was chiseled under the last moon viewed for three sixty three days ahead. Uprooted vines of old pine will hold the bark tight. Breath revealing around the outsides of his appendage. Like a fork in the road, which way can you go, for him air strides both. Scuffling fearful towards the pike of the tundra, he is where wanted by none. A be all end all as you could alleviate ones slightest sympathy, the courage it takes, ****** immense. His sweat was not seen, but there it consists. One hand grappled around his earthly dagger, tongue positioned in an outward arrangement. Travail glowing all over him as an aura unlanguid with no disruption veering. Abound now, without great weight on his shoulders, he’s lived. Ascending keen eyes towards the blood bath around his feet, going both ways around the fork and road. After relinquishing his steady gavel, the checking of his pulse is counted. 5, 6, 7, 8, seconds, still life to live. For the very first ritual to come, placed in his mouth, the tongue. The rigid roof so unfamiliar and new he bestowed in his joy of such a common flank. The tundra felt warm as he inside let over pour. Once more a milder gasp as he vociferates to the last moon for the year. On his peak, and favored place of being, he let out his tongue. Sharp inclement so hawkish and frosted he felt. The lilliputian of no pain, heeded by first snow to wane.
this was inspired by the album art of Morgul;

http://black-legion-shop.de/catalog/images/Morgul%20-%20Sketch%20Of%20Supposed%20Murderer%20-%20CD.jpg
 May 2012 jeremy maxwell
mEb
body stillness in the guru lake
a breaking flake of stables and horse flies
decomposing mouths and carcass, mouths and cries
sand bags on his feet, she flees

now recovered from the guru pond
fast evaporation
bloated disposition
no goal of death position



(laughs)
In the great garden of the lie of Jesus
There lived a great lion
and he saw a caterpillar slowly walking by and he said,
"Hello there, kind sir"
and the caterpillar replied,
"*******, *******"
and the lion was sad
and the caterpillar looked at the lion for a second
and he said,
"Aw, I'm sorry dude, I was just ******* with you."
she's the girl that drinks too much coffee


the girl with the long skirts

she's the girl that looks through you, blankly
(when she's looking into the thing you don't want her to see)


she is the girl with sticky fingers.


the girl with honey love colored eyes



she's the girl that wonders who wrote all that mean stuff on the bathroom wall
who is becky?
why is she a gootch?

...what is a gootch?


she's the girl that has hair like
silk
halfway down her back

it covers up her spine
which pokes through her sweaters

and sometimes her overalls.


she's the girl that gets up early and stays up late
because she thinks sleeping is a waste of life



she's the girl

that begs you

with a single look

to love her



for as long as you can

and when you don't anymore,

let go


she's the girl
that will

understand.
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