if i believe
in death be sure
of this
it is

because you have loved me,
moon and sunset
stars and flowers
gold crescendo and silver muting

of seatides
i trusted not,
                    one night
when in my fingers

drooped your shining body
when my heart
sang between your perfect
*******

darkness and beauty of stars
was on my mouth petals danced
against my eyes
and down

the singing reaches of
my soul
spoke
the green-

greeting pale-
departing irrevocable
sea
i knew thee death.

                              and when
i have offered up each fragrant
night,when all my days
shall have before a certain

face become
white
perfume
only,
          from the ashes
then
thou wilt rise and thou
wilt come to her and brush

the mischief from her eyes and fold
her
mouth the new
flower with

thy unimaginable
wings,where dwells the breath
of all persisting stars

that's the summer the war starts
the blood runs thicker
the nights go colder
but we're still so poor
so we huddle for warmth

that fall we must contribute to the effort
"all able over 18
must enlist"
but you're still so young and I worry so much
you join anyways

we thought it had been a cold summer
it was tropical compared to winter
your growing body wraps around mine
you're getting taller
(but I'm still not that small
you're just so
tall)

that spring the birds sing
the ground breaks and even though
the flowers are coated with blood
it's still
the most beautiful spring
I've ever seen

I used to give you cigarettes as if they were flowers
I used to tell you that loving you was like plucking a flower
And you wanted to plant yourself as one in me  
Not knowing that you were doing it as if
you were putting out a cigarette on my chest
Because, to tell the truth,
Loving you was like lighting up and not smoking .

I still pine for us.