it’s been so long since i’ve written about you.
maybe i am too preoccupied on what’s happening daily

but yes, let’s take it as a positive note

however, there are still days where i crave your presence
how we talked nonchalantly

i miss you, really.

it still hurts that i've lost you
but not only did  i lost you,
but i also lost the guts and courage to talk to you.

you assured me nothing will change.
but the change i’ve seen and felt is drastic.

i can’t talk to you in a free and careless manner anymore.
i can’t consider you my safe space now.

don’t get me wrong, i still feel safe with you.
but not like i used to.

I attend college in an apocalypse
I'm planning for a future that doesn't exist
Paying these grandiose establishments
So they can give me a piece of paper
A modern day participation award

The poet lives two lives.
One on the outside,
And one in their mind.

When you look in their eyes
You could see an abyss.

If you looked long enough
You could sink into it.

But most people don’t see it.

Take the time to read the words, though,
And you would know for sure.

The poet lives in two different worlds.

My grandpa
             Words he gave
                            To me once upon a full moon
“Son” he said
            “When you go into this life”
“Remember, that love is a language “
             “So find, my son, find someone”
                     “Who speaks your language “
      “So you don’t have to translate your soul”
                                   Hmmm.