We all squeezed into the trunk
My hipbone pressed against yours
You looked down at the photo on your phone
And a soft lock of hair fell over your forehead
I wanted to push my hands into your hood and through the waves of mousey brown

The air was full of our laughter and bass-heavy music
And camera flashes and the smell of teakwood
Our feet dragged easily over the wet pavement
Pushing away orange leaves and awkwardness
There's this boy...I really like his fluffy hair and the way he smiles at me
They voted him in
They voted him in
And I cried
They voted him in
And I cried
They voted him in
And I cried
I screamed
I tore my hair and scratched my skin
I ripped myself to shreds
I wailed to *** or Yaweah or Allah
Or the empty sky
Who swallowed my pain indifferently
And I put myself back together on tear soaked bed sheets
What else can I do
They have all the power
And I’m 17
For gods sake I’m only 17
I’m feeling a little helpless lately
I wrote a poem when I died...
Another at my birth.
A brand-new sonnet when I cried.
And again when there was mirth.

A song for my confession...
A story for my pain...
A painting for depression...
And nursery rhymes for rain.

My creations live inside my heart.
I keep them there in shame.
Yet you looked around and saw my art,
And smiled all the same.
Today I am having a Day
And not in a very good way
My skin's breaking out
I might just drop-out
**** my life, I'm hitting the hay
Um, so...I'm having a Day if you couldn't tell. Shout out to anyone who's ever felt like they're going to ******* explode because they're so stress
I'm a lonely girl
I can say it in cute pink beads and
In tumblr tags and
In curly cursive hand writing and
In a giggle

I'm a lonely girl
I can say it in poetry and
In music and
In pictures

I'm a lonely girl
I can say it in therapy and
In late night talks and
Into my pillow
Alone
While my tears and mucus soak my pillow
I want you to love me
I want you to touch my skin
I want you to feel how soft it is
How warm
How it smells like me
Like cotton and perfume and desperation
I want you to breath me in
I want you to bottle me up
To take fistfuls of my hair
To take fistfuls of me
And love them
Even though I don’t love me
Even though
I want you to burn up with love
And melt me
Distill me
And make me better

— The End —