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Jacob Rosenberg Oct 2018
I felt pain
But I am at peace

My mind entertained doubts
But I feel clarity

I questioned my self
But I received an answer

I have a future

The struggle of now
The struggle of the past
And the insecurity of my mind

Weight that has no place on my shoulders

I will grow
I will love
I will be strong

I will unabashedly be me
Jacob Rosenberg May 2020
The rain kisses the earth

A breath of cool air

Caught between two acts
And I’m just standing there

I whisper my thoughts
And the strength to proclaim escapes me

Who comforts my mind when nostalgias face hurts to look at

What purpose do I carry
When my hands can no longer create

What place do I reserve at my table when I can’t wake from my nightmare

From under the pergola I look beyond to a cloudy sky

And to a fractured self

So tired
Ashamed
So raw

Weight builds around a frame that once brought pride

Hair covers a face that never stoped smiling

Shadows dwell in a heart that used to be so open

Abba where have I gone
Creator why doesn’t the son rise up
Father what lies have built residence within my mind

God why am I lost and searching for your name
Jacob Rosenberg Feb 2020
Its on street corners that the wind bites the cruelest

Its in my mind that my pain is the greatest

My life so unique

In my understanding of the pain I lift my chin up high
I see the beautiful stars

I walk with a home to return to
a place to stop the cold from my skin

In the same air I know ill soon be out of
I walk until I see them

Curled on the ground
On an entry way they will likely be kicked out of

How dare I shiver

I see now that humility is begging for my hand in marriage

But I can't
You see

I'm trying to keep my hands warm
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
its late

my chest grows cold
where your head used to rest

time fades on
as my heart follows suit to my skin

I've almost forgotten your lips
and the way that you taste

curious what can happen during a single waxing and waning of the moon

for fear of empty words I stay silent

waiting on you

though I miss you dearly
I understand fully

hurry home my love

this bed is meant to be shared
Jacob Rosenberg Jul 2018
sometimes it finds you

on the hood of a car
or the end of a burning cigarette

carelessly in the eyes of a stranger
or the secrecy of a whisper

the steam of a coffee
and the companionship of a smile

a face to forget
and the broken continuity of a memory

the hard metal of a camera
and the expired film

interlocked fingers
and the feeling of her body

shameless as it should be
love is bound by circumstance and fear

of what I am not sure

yet broken by passion

it is good
it is kind
it is holy

it is mine
Jacob Rosenberg Jul 2018
my solace
my confidant
my brother

I have made mistakes aplenty
I have cried into the night
I have lied through my teeth
I have sinned and never asked for forgiveness
I have sought and never found

but regardless you remained steadfast

I doubted your path and ambitions
I was lost in myself
and denied you

I am emotional

you are gone
a least in presence
and I long for another bond

you chase the lead your heart feeds
you sought wisdom and were not forgotten

I've seen your blood
your tears
your struggles and shortcomings
successes and failures
your family is mine
and mine yours
death could be the only separation

so live on

be the man you've fought to be
be the man that your lover needs

and continue being closer than blood to me
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
to be captivated by your eyes and chase the sun

to pick up the fragments and make a beautiful picture

the beauty of a craft not limited by another agenda

the surface of the sea and a sirens serenity

and to curiously follow a leaf taken by the wind
tossed and tumbled in a beautiful dance
skating from life to adventure

how does one catch a leaf that has gone with the wind?

simple

be the breeze that carries her along the way
Jacob Rosenberg Feb 2020
She's more than moved on
She's buried my name in a dark place along with the others

I feel it well in my chest
The same pain I told her to let go of

The fractured self is such a curious example of naivety
My soul presses into the memory
My heart sheds tears that only she has seen
And my mind doubts the perfect things I told myself

The air struggles to find the bottom of my lungs
Vision blurry while I look at my reflection

So softly I whisper the truth that used to hold me at night
So tentatively I allow my steps to guide the walk I hold in such high regard

My words now are not that of wisdom and somber reflection

But of a cry into the night

And a denial of tomorrow's light
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
her smile

her faith

her heart

words dance and stumble around my head

to capture in whole who you are to me
words would never satiate the reality

the unyielding passion
to
your hand on my chest

your breath on my neck

the still of the night that we share with closed eyes

beyond what is written
you are my once in a lifetime

ever waiting on a forever with you
Jacob Rosenberg Jul 2018
I am introspectively stuck staring into the glass

and with pangs of question in my heart

why does this face look so familiar

have I become the liar

or am I darker

cast shout into the void

I have become dangerously poised

yet regardless of how long it will take you

you're fearful to live a life comfortable with the noise
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
a black highway road guides my body as my mind quietly wanders

stepping onto the fragile
and pondering what lies beneath

allowing the shackles of restraint to fall free from my heart
inviting a relentless mercy

I am yours
and
you are mine

allowing the pain of doubt to melt away  

my king
I kneel before

allowing the truth of love to permeate

my staggered faith
ignites
and burns for him

chasing the creator is no monetary venture

weak still I lean on you

blessed to wander under your hand
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
The curiosity of insecurity

To witness the diminishing of ones self worth
With the hands of a pure or vile heart

To question morality in the face of false assurance

The hot lump of wisdoms coal burns my throat as I speak with icy truths

I cut my cheek with my razor tongue

I spit on my own shoes

My hair is in my face

Inward pronating toes as I feel my posture change

Shifting and ******* with my shirt

The eyes that peer hold the most power over me

God forbid I trust in the opinion of my lover

“Made for me”

But with so much to fix

White knuckles grip my palms
Wild greens catch my psyche

I will stand in the mud

Sing out of tune

Walk with a goofy gait

Smile in my crooked way

Embrace my family

Laugh as loud as I want

Kiss your forehead

And dance in the lightning storm

I’m thankful for my fear
It blesses me with open eyes
A heart that breaks and reminds me of a life to live

To kneel before my God

Insecurities in hand

Take my sorrows from my calloused palms
Jacob Rosenberg Jul 2018
I will become a stranger to you

I will cry

I will pray

I will love the memories
and remember the laughter

I ruined everything
and I have nothing to say

a decisive cut

you're bleeding

I'm shouting with hands over my ears
a blade from my mouth
pride permeating my heart

my soul mourns who I have become
my mind is dull
my shirt is *****
and my reputation untrustworthy

I still am a liar

I cannot embrace humility

she has a cold grip
and my vice is warmth

a platinum change
its simple

Forget me
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2017
The jazz drops
Your voice stops

The ***** i have left to give
Somewhere else

Go look for them

The company i used to keep
Stale
Selfish
And the same beat
Stomp your feet
Its the end of the week

Find the *****
Pick up the pipe
The time is right
Tell that ***** shes a ****

do you really think i was put on this planet to be liked?

*******
Jacob Rosenberg Dec 2016
homeward bound
i will walk to the ends of things split
the tip of any iceberg
the bottoms of valleys long

and i will stand for you
you will be my greatest adventure

may i call you darling?
may i please hold your hand?

you see chance has been calling my name
she told me to whisper in your ear

"i am not falling anymore... i am in love with you"

but that sound?
what comes towards me?

the failed echo of my voice has shouted back
i am coming to a dark truth

i have been speaking to the valleys i have walked to for you
the mountains Ive climbed
and the distances Ive driven

sickly i allow my voice to haunt me
and truly now i can tell myself

I am alone
Jacob Rosenberg Dec 2016
a complex mind finds the soft complex of the simple
watch the same moon
what color is it?
what lies can you pour for me to drink?
the everclear percentage
a disappointment in whats to be hidden
the wisdom of your decision
the fools ransom
the jesters plea
creativity lost amongst dying intimacy
rhymes beckon my name
i become addicted to their cry
i am not to blame
buts its not my name that caused  your fall
please don't bother at all
**** your words and monotonous pain
you simply replicate the dancers flame
poems to find fever in the form
all the times i fought for you
there was never a doubt in my mind
maybe it should have been a story for a simpler time
one without reason or rhyme
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2017
Forgive me but whats your name?
I know we once loved

Your face?

Yes i remember
The features of a dove

The old folks told me your name
The piano rang in the background

But for some reason your face just never comes round
Maybe ill remember after I'm in the ground?
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
Surreal

I can feel it in the back of my skull
The struggle of taking a breath
The curiosity of my heartbeat

What is my soul holding onto

The restless unease
A drive that stops at dead ends
A hand around my neck

Words that have been spoken to soon

It has a name

I fear to speak it

To speak life into the void that I dance with so effortlessly

I call upon my father
so humble and so kind

Fear to speak the name of the devil

Pride to call the name of the creator

Guide me
Lead me
Protect me

My savior
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2017
cheats have it easy
they don't speak what they do
**** they just do
they are the silent

fakes have it easy
they pretend yet never say anything
they are way better looking too

crooks have it easy
they get to do whatever the **** they want to
and get a pretty window to look out of upon getting caught

liars have it hard
we speak with out spaces
so as to keep truth from sneaking through the cracks

unlike all the others
liars are not branches
we are not the roots

we are the trunk of every bad choice
once you make the liars vow
you can choose to grow down any of the sinners paths

but i then beg the question who will fix my crooked branches and aspen trunk that claims the name birch?

the sun?

**** no

the sun allows me to grow
to be twisted and mangled like the facade i am
not to mention its just a ******* ball of gas

the water?

**** no

the water gives me new flavor for my lies
lets me grow wider and fat on my mistakes

the other trees?

**** no

the other trees strangle me
shade my sun and drink my water
they are why i lie

the earth?

**** no

the earth is the whole reason i am an aspen claiming birch
why hold me
why birth the water to nourish me
why circle the sun to grow me
why plant the other trees to **** me

the sad truth is no one can fix you and your ****** mistakes
you just have to grow the way you are exposed
climb the way the vine does
seasonally find new ways to be different

i do not give a ****
i know who i am
serenade the fools with talk of perfection
but i will graciously pass
i am human
i am gifted
indefinitely spew the sap of hate
i am wonderfully made
i am divine

i am a liar
Jacob Rosenberg Dec 2016
a gentle look of affirmation
eyes so beautiful
yet lost in the requiems march of time
don't lie.
A soft hand on the shoulder
a gentle kiss
the warm air on your cheek
reminiscent of an ambiguous time.
I took one path but found my story fell like a stone upon your chromatic life.
A long drive to the finish was only a perception in my mind.
My eyes were closed.
I never thought I'd wake up to the sound of your sorry voice and confused gaze.
Lay on your side and ill refresh your memory.
Did you really get comfortable in my pain?
The ache of my story was your cool glass of water.
A late talk is actually an early step in your game
I call foul play
but pawns never had a say with a queen.
My ostensible look
the facade of my game
a true story with no linearity
a heathen.
Concealing sadness
stay beyond reproach
yet careen into the oblivion that is love.
The shivering isles of our commentary.
The dark scare of being tucked in by a stranger.
The translucence of a foreigners eyes
my monotonous speech to your ever prevalent change.
Her persona.
a wave in the ocean.
The scarcity of oxygen.
The dearth for love and yearning of coitus.
Degradation of my psych
the wasting away of my body
a pleasant atrophy
your love kept on the fringe.
Decay like wood among a termitary.
I beg for your love to permeate the confounds of a yearning soul.
Jacob Rosenberg Sep 2018
Behind your eyes is a mind that captivates me
Inside of you is a soul that inspires me

Every breath of air you take
Every kiss on my cheek
Every prayer you whisper  

You are proof that God is real

You are the best drug
Im addicted to the feeling

Chase the wind with me

Praise the king with me
Kneel while we pray

Laugh while we cuddle
Cry when we struggle

Sing songs with the wrong words
Do cartwheels in public

I want to see you be you

And I want to fall in love every time
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2017
Lips that buzz would sure make her happy
Stay a few inches above her ******

Lips that buzz would sure make the best music
But make sure the beat sticks

Lips that buzz would share the best news
To bad its all gossip

Lips that buzz would be pretty ******* funny to watch
**** shame nobody would know your name

Lips that buzz would definitely play the best brass
****** you're an atrociously late ***

Lips that buzz?

Mine don't do that anymore
Guess I'm stuck with a sour set of memories and a ****** poem
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
broken fears sat tasteless on my tongue

inspiring fear filled words
and pain inducing thoughts

through the best sides
and the worst sides of me

her compassion is unyielding

her love has proven to have no true boundaries

her words have broken my heart as a result of my actions
but no matter the context of the words
they have always been the remedy I was searching for

she is my once in a lifetime

my intended one and only

slow dancing in the rain
while laughing late into the night

my good morning kiss
my late night lover

my forever
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
he speaks the truth
yet its a falsehood

she earnestly listens
but is deaf by perspective

fact becomes fiction in the mouth of a man who can't keep his lips shut tight before the ears of a stranger

wisdom is sought and falsely found

spewed like a healing cancer
and sought out by those who only half heartedly seek the truth

truth as it stands remains the truth

lies bob and weave like a boxer in a thrown bout

humble your tongue

you and your words are not gods gift to the planet

be silent

speak truth
speak wisdom
speak life
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
in its solitude
a rose silently wilts

with ostensible vision
the skulls watch with lifeless eyes

the paper on which they both decay pays no mind

ever stead fast they become something they never anticipated
that being
dead and lifeless to the ones they left behind

begging a curious eyes attention to the direction of their new story

peering introspectively at their fragile
yet striking forms

they question to no truth

the rose will darken a heart and rot
as its their nature

the skull will turn a blind eye and to dust
as is its nature

and the paper will still pay no mind

because in that moment of its weakness
the history of their decaying shells are wiped from its canvas

immortalized in forgotten words
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2019
a morning away from me

my eyes search for your delicate silhouette

the figments of my mind
for a brief moment
become a reality to my dreary witness

broken
upon the flickering light

tears fill as I look at a sun you have already seen

soft wooden panels warm my feet
blue walls occupy my peripheral
blurry hills dot the horizon

yet my gaze lies stead fast on your first words to me

not to be lead astray my forever

you are my greatest adventure
alone I whisper our truth and secret

I love you
Jacob Rosenberg Dec 2018
blatant disregard for the accepted norm

challenging the negativity thats been allowed to become cyclical

loving shamelessly and fearlessly in the face of a depreciating statement

I wake up and ask God if I deserve a heart as true as yours

you have become my secret keeper

my confidant

my good morning
and good night

my tears

and my I love you

I can see forever in your gaze
and feel passion on your lingering lips

I find myself on my knees
where I stay and thank God for your every blessing

don't forget words like these

because only you will hear them
Jacob Rosenberg Sep 2018
Clouds fall apart in an all familiar blue

Her hand on my shoulder

The sweetest of affirmations

Her lips

The open road

Beach hair and sandy toes

True love and loving companionship

The adventure of no true destination is the song of my soul

But to share that same soul

That is why I love you
Jacob Rosenberg Feb 2020
Crooked wooden tables hold the story of a thousand travelers

Heavy eyes allow for pause in the flow of a coffee shop
Whispers break through the cancellation of sound

Close to you

Finger painted emotions are showing on my van goh face
I relieve the stress

Concerned looks

I know how familiar that smell is
It simply comes with the tide of this year

The taste of wine on your lips

My problems rest easy like his hands on your hips
Gentle glances at the marks on their skin

Unspoken words dance on a ******* closed mouth
I contemplate voicing
But bid farewell instead

I grin with crooked teeth and smile

To dwell on this color of life

Through this inflection I now see the canvas that my life is being painted on

I love the strokes and curves

I now ready my hand

With love
Prayer
And preparedness

Forever loving where my soul will guide
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
Country roads and old trails
Skin and scars
Her body and her breath

Love letters and kodiak film

Ashy sunsets
White walls
Blue eyes

Joy from the lyrics of a heart song
Peace in the buzz of fresh air
Sleep in a touch

Why dream at all when you’re my favorite thought

Love divided among the few

Cherished by us two
Jacob Rosenberg Oct 2018
Shadows of leaves passing along the white marble counter top

Gentle Reflection over tea and milk

Somber thoughts
Peaceful tranquility
And Loving hearts

I understand now

To be found and to find
One that will share your heart and soul

To be in harmony with your creator

To bring tears to your eyes at the thought of who she is

To live this blessing of a life
And share it with the same mind

Our love is once in a lifetime

Let’s chase this breeze together
Jacob Rosenberg Jan 2017
tides come and go
people live and die
memories are like a parked car
made to be filled with love making

days gone
friends forgotten
stand by my window sill
forget why we have names
true we were never friends

days gone
monotonus religion
jazz looses tune
**** its luster
my life spins

fluid fills a strangers eyes
tears from her cheek
she was a goofball
he was Asian as ****

my life filled his ears
my friendship founded in the first impression
bagpipes make you cringe
sunlight makes you wince

your breath ******* reeks
you were ****** for weeks

why did you hate me
was it simply to spite me
maybe you never liked me

but at least you never lied to me
spit balling
Jacob Rosenberg Dec 2016
time and distance
merely ambiguous excuses
a rose in your window sill
ambitious but broken in gesture
a love song
your name fell flat amongst a sharp tone
an altruistic chord i sang
truly, truly fell to disdain
a call from the dark shadows
you withheld light
a change in tone
a style to frown
and yet more form and dissonance
a distilled fever
a vessel of love now a cacophony of disappointment
hate burns in a heart tethered by jealous love
circumstance has deteriorated a chance at a shared joy
please don't leave
please don't go
the gentle touch  of your lips
the only song i know
a turn of your head
a phenomena turned Greek
a system to terminate
the irate sound of a lovers fate
Jacob Rosenberg Aug 2018
Grey light filters through your window
Exposing a blue that I have been yearning to see in you

So softly you take a breath

To kiss your forehead
To grip your hand

Holding tightly to the fingertips

Nothing but truth has escaped my forsworn lips

To dance

To laugh

To live

A blessing in the most curious way
Jacob Rosenberg Apr 2020
Delicate hands soften a classical sound

Love in the air but not in the heart

A tragic and impressional soul left behind
Staring at a weeping reflection

A time from before mine holds my melancholic thoughts in warm hands

Whispers and the early morning song remind me of my solidarity

This peace

Id be a fool to look on the life I’m living with doubt

With disdain

A jazz tune weaves simplicity into my words
Casual jubilee into my thoughts
Careless expectations
And a broken memory to fill my dreams

The darkest house is a lonely house

And I refuse to live in the shadows of my choices

The life I lead is uncertain

But still I dream

And still I look forward to the whispers and early morning song

— The End —