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Ivy Leigh Mar 20
Has anyone considered
The sticker on a window
The kind that is gel
And also removable

They come and go
With the holidays and seasons
They hold a memory
And at least have a reason

Now that I’ve gone from home
And the memories faded
I wonder what happened
To those gel window stick creations

If they still put them up
Wherever they are
I hope their visitors are near
And my love is never far
Ivy Leigh Nov 2020
I close my door,
to open the window,
to keep it from a,
pressure permission,
I was unaware,
that the window was broken,
or it does not close,
and I didn’t now lives open
, I would have closed it,
  and left a draft,
it let the leaves in,
but crack procrastination lasts
Ivy Leigh Jul 2020
Something predictable
like a drunk slander
or a high whisper
might set off my visitors
viewers and my hinderers
to tell me I am not better.
I shiver
barely thinking of her
thinking she could be better.
I thought myself better
than the treatment
I give out I take less
but it tastes bad in my mouth.
Another vision of more missed clout
better life in than out
outside just letting people grow
just giving what I know
and not vibes to affect the flow.
Just tell me what I owe.
You never gave a **** before.
I will live up for things that don't show.
Call me before I blow.
07/15/2020
Ivy Leigh Jul 2020
So much runs through my mind.
The longing I've felt can't be filled
with someone else's stares.
I close my eyes to opportunity
and ill-spend motivated moments.
I hurt.
I lose myself in friends and boredom,
boring the god while she watches over me,
I give out vouchers for spending time with me,
beg for greetings more than I am sorry
and "hope your not missing your mommy"
She's better now somewhere thats green
her favorite color I think
smells a lot like her jealousy
forever rejecting sobriety;
that now lives on in me.
I can't bring myself to say
the things I keep dark in my sleep.
My shadow self speaks now
and hides from lucidity
lives in my hearts painfully
and never lets go of me.
They live on my back and only moves
to avoid backstabbing.
Why does it hurt so
I can't see my future?
Where is the sound
leading to passions that lure?
I cannot see farther
than a fire that flows.
I cannot love harder
than my trust can throw.
Where is the person to be with me for real growth?
Someone amazed without pity
a "what-if" in full glow.
07/13/2020
I am really hurting. My heart cries so much while I try to make everything okay. I am healthy. I am independent. Where did my little motivation go?
Ivy Leigh Apr 2020
It has been a bad day.
I took a nap in the morning
and was on my phone all day
I kept hitting on the pen
and avoided food in every way,
I did everything to keep quiet
sleeping helped keep hunger at bay.
I didn't do a lick of reading,
but went to an appointment even though I wanted to stay.
The only thing that made me feel better
is when I masturbated in the shower,
but I day-dreamed my ex-boyfriend
and that his **** had super powers.
12/17/19
Ivy Leigh Apr 2020
I felt like crying
But I held it back
And I didn't try
Because I thought I'd regret.
I want to feel good
When I'm making "like" to you,
I don't want to test you
And I don't want you to feel blue
There were some things
That I did have on my mind
I was distracted
And could have been unkind.
That does not mean
I don't want to talk to you
No matter the problem
The answers can never be few.
So please just see me
We'll calm each other's minds
And remove the sounds hollow
Eroding the cliff behind
Ivy Leigh Apr 2020
I'm depressed
I'm a mess
I'm afraid to send that text
When you said
I could spend
Any moment with you to mend
Oh my heart
Needs to start
After hours spent apart
I miss you
Yes it's true
But I'm looking for a cue
That doesn't have to do
With the constant need to *****
Baby you're all I need
And you even make me scream
But beside all the ***
Where will you take this thing next
So I need a little change
That wherever you go
You will loosen up the reigns
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